Quote:
Quote:
While I will not DISagreee with you - the reality is that "be confident" is the worst advice ever - while this is what many systems encourage, the effective systems instead give material and step by step processes to confidence. The reason for this is that to your average socially anxious/inept person, saying "be confident" is about as useful as saying "be a PUA" they have no idea how to do it and woudln't even know where to start.
It is a nice summary of the base of most PUA techniques, but it is over simplistic and not helpful to an AFC. (no hate).
Telling an un-confident person to "be confident" is like throwing a non-swimmer in a river and shouting "swim!" However I still think they are two good points. Just get some swimming lessons.
On the other hand, the best way to learn is to just do it and see for yourself. Maybe drowning isn't the best example haha, but as a guitarist, I look at it like this:
An instructor can teach you scales and notes and theory until they are blue in the face, but you won't ever develop your own style until you break away from that and just do it yourself. Think about your favorite few bands. Each of them has their own distinguished and recognizable style that cannot be taught. You've probably heard a new song on the radio before and have been able to figure out the band before the DJ tells you who it is. Style is something that is just felt. Everyone holds the guitar differently. I play barre chords using my
thumb because it gives my other fingers more mobility to improv. My one jam-session mate uses his
index finger to barre and that's fine because his style doesn't require his other fingers to move from a fixed position. Not one of us is better than the other... we just have different styles that we found work for us through experimentation and just playing.
So is the thumb better than the index finger? No. It all comes down to preference and style. I was taught guitar using my index to barre, but on my own time and through experimentation, I learned to prefer my thumb.
Summary: Throw those non-swimmers into the water... but give them some inflatable "water-wings" on their arms AKA give direction but allow each person to find his or her own style and flow.