I'm a sophomore in college and I met this cute freshman chick at a small party. I asked her out on a date before xmas break and she said yes. We walked around the city a lot, I bought her dinner, we got dessert somewhere else, walked her home, and kissed her good night a couple times. We had a really good time and had tons of stuff to talk about.

The next day we left for xmas break for 3 weeks. To let her know I was thinking of her I texted her once a week over break and also called her on xmas to wish her merry xmas.

we got back from xmas break and i asked her if she wanted to go out again and she said yes. we went out again, walked around the city (diff area), I bought her dinner again because it was only the 2nd date even though she offered to split it. we went back to my place to watch a movie on my bed. we made out off and on the whole time using tongue and i was dry humping her...in a subtle fashion though haha. i didnt try to go past that because i didnt want to make her uncomfortable. i even said i dont want to make you uncomfortable so let me know if i do too much. she responded "k". it was 2am and she said "i really dont want to walk home cause its gonna be so cold out!" so i offered to walk her home and did. we made out good night.

a week ago i was at a party with my friends and i invited her and her friends out to it. it was a huge dance party and i was completely wasted when she arrived. i kissed her when she got there and we talked for a little bit. her girl friend grabbed her and said lets go dance so they did. i was talking to my friend for a bit then i look over at the dance floor and shes grinding with some guy. i was completely shocked because she seemed like a really nice girl. i go over and pull the guy off and get in his face. hes like "yo! sorry man, i thought she was single!". i turn to her and im like what the f***? she tells me she doesnt want to be in a relationship. im so shocked i ask her if we can talk in the bedroom so we can actually hear each other.

we sit down in the bedroom (keep in mind im still so drunk) and im like are you serious? she says she doesnt really want to be tied down and doesnt want a boyfriend because shes just a freshman in college. i told her i understand that but that she should have told me instead of showed me by grinding with some guy at the party. we talked for a bit more with me drunkenly explaining how disappointed i was in her and she apologized over and over. we walked out to the front of the house and we hugged good bye and i left cause i was so pissed.

i told my friends the whole story and they were all shocked i didnt try to have sex with her the 2nd date and they said thats def what she wanted. in retrospect it def seems that i should have tried but at the time i thought she wanted a relationship so i tried to be respectful and show her that i was a decent guy (huge mistake).

i want to have sex with this girl now. i put too much time and effort into it to get nothing out of it. i texted her yesterday asking her if she wanted to come over to just chill and watch a movie. she said thats sounds fun but i have a test tomorrow i really need to study for, maybe another time if thats cool. so i said yeah id text her later this week and made a joke about her studying. she responded hahaha and made a joke about it in return and i didnt respond because the last thing i want to do is come off as clingy.

what are my chances of actually getting this girl over here? she MUST know what a movie entails because she knows we'd be watching it on my bed with the lights off like before. i made it clear in the text that im not trying to change her mind either.

what do you guys think? do i have a shot? im not going to text her at all unless it is asking her to come over. i know i got too jealous and possessive too quickly and that probably scared her off so im trying to reverse that. i think im gonna text her tomorrow and ask her if she wants to come over because tuesday nights are best for me.

any advice?

edit: also when she was over the 2nd night she was cuddling with me and was really into it. she would look up and smile and she also talked in an annoying baby voice a few times. i found that really unattractive but i figured it meant she was really in to me.

ok so i know how u feel cuz i was with this girl and we both were in our freshman yr of college and everytime we met up and her tongue was invvolved it also involved us dry humping at her dorm, my house or at the bathroom of the club or at a park even... but we never actually fucked, in the middle of us being half naked at her dorm room she still didn't want to fuck but it pretty much seemed to be, (and i think i had a bigger chance of doing it earlier), so she gets up and says that if we actually fuck then we should be in a relationship and that crap, then last week we went to a club as friends, and she started hooking up with this guy in front of me right after we stopped seeing each other as "hooking up" which pissed me off, i didn't deck the guy or anything i jus grabbed my boy and we chilled a outside of the club and jus ignored her for like a week till she started sending e txt msgs saying how she's srry and all that crap

personally it pissed me off how i was so close and we still didn't fuck


now your case....
u should've jus fucked her on the second date, or atleast tried to

ok number 1: your in college bro, im in college also and trust me, 99.9% of college girls dun want a relationship so don't even bother

number 2: you shouldn't have done anything while she was grinding on him even if she was ur gf, you dun want to be the guy that doesn't let his gf/ hook-up buddy, talk to another guy because he might steel her away, as a matter of fact you should've jus watched her and got with another girl at the party, jealousy goes a long way my friend

number 3: i think that your pretty much screwed sideways and she jus told u that she has a test tom morn and she couldn't come meet u for a movie at ur house because she doesn't want to get closer to you and have feelings involved cuz she still wants to fool around

number 4: i know how u feel when u say that u want to fuck her even after all of that, but bro u gotta realize that there are a ton of girls out there who are probly even better.

number 5 you shouldn't have acted the way u did because u guys weren't in a relationship and technically u both could've been seeing someone else and it would've been ok cuz ur NOT in a relation ship

Number 6: i think that you fucked up to bad to get in bed with her again.... jus treat her as ur friend and see other women u never know what might happen down the road

Dude if she is your girlfriend she should not be with other people. That is entirely the point of being in a relationship. It does not make sense to go around fucking other people but have a "girlfriend/boyfriend". That is an entitlement of importance. It says, "hey that girl/guy. Is mine. I love her and she loves me and we are together and its us." If that security isn't there she isn't/he isn't your relationship partner they are a fuck buddy.

Dumbass

alright from point of view your shown some serious insecurity....
first of all what u mean other people? cuz listen jus because your in a relationship doesn't mean that your gf can't go out at all with her guy/ girl friends without u, if u trust your gf then u should be ok with her jus dancing with another guy, im not talking about her fucking or kissing the guy.... in that case you never should've been with the bitch in the fist place

Yeah I know i fucked up. i was so drunk that night and she knew it so i think when i ask her over tomorrow im just gonna try to make light of it by saying something like i promise i wont be retardedly drunk saying stupid things this time haha

just to let her know that im not normally a possessive guy.

hmmm u can try but i think that its too soon, let some time flow by stay in touch wth her tho and invite her over like a few days later, when u hang out wit her try to ignore the subject if u can, and jus move on like that night didn't happen or if she asks u about it jus say that u were so drunk that night that u barely remember what happened haha

i think the time is perfect. this didnt happen this last weekend, it happened the weekend before and we havent really talked at all since then. plus we werent friends before i took her out on the date so its not like we see each other. i need to act now before she completely forgets who i am. she had a really good time hanging out with me with the exception of one drunken night so hopefully she realizes that.

Complete waste of my time.. here

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Friendzone 1-vt51424.html?postdays=0&postorder=asc&start=0

ooooo ok so in that case you right good luck bro =]

Read The Game by Neil Strauss, peruse some articles online, listen to some podcasts. Let it all sink in. Let us know how the next girl goes after that.

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Live Your Truth.

You definitely dropped the ball on that one if having sex was your goal. But are you sure having sex WAS your goal? It sounds like YOU are the one that wanted to get into a relationship with her. In that case, she doesn't seem like the kind of girl worth pursuing.

But if you feel you have to get something out of it (pussy), then you need to redeem yourself. Here is the formula:

Step 1:
Go out with her again to a public place as "friends". Preferably bring another female friend or get comfy with a random girl that you meet at the club, bar or whatever. Make your girl a little jealous. All this will cancel out your previous clingyness, desparation and nice-guy'ism. Attraction will start to build.

Step 2:
After you've gotten her attention THEN invite her over for the movie watch and close the deal.

i thought she was a girl who wanted a relationship. i guess i'd prefer a relationship but having a sex buddy is a very close 2nd . im just gonna text her tomorrow asking if she wants to hang out and that i wont be ridiculously drunk saying things i regret (in a comical manner). hopefully she'll understand that i was really drunk and being stupid because we had fun hanging out together otherwise. and if not, then oh well, ive done all i could to fix a mistake.

EDIT:

how does this sound? i want it to show her that i was drunk and seriously regret what i did while also making light of it by quickly changing the subject to an inside joke (the muay thai).

"Hey, you want to hang out tonight? I promise this time I wont be retardedly drunk doing/saying weird things I really regret. Plus, I need to try out my new muay thai moves on you haha"

your thoughts? i dont want to straight up say im sorry because i still feel she didnt handle it correctly. i just want her to know that im not normally possessive like that and that im fine with just the fun stuff and no relationship.

You're still supplicating.

Dude. The only reason I'm replying is that I really do want to help you. I think that everyone on this forum was once in a similar place to where you are now. So we can understand where you're coming from.

But you can't just come on a website and ask "What do I do?" without gaining the knowledge and appreciation of the principles behind pick-up. Seriously, do some homework. THAT is what will help you, and if will help you for life, not just one night or for one girl, FOR LIFE.

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Live Your Truth.

***update*** texted her around noon casually asking her if she wanted to chill tonight....i get this response:

"Hey so sry im just textin back I pretty much slept all day cuz I was up last night til 5 studyin for a test and I also am sry I keep bailing on you but I promised some my friends I would play intermeral basketball with them tonight lame I know but it’s a big deal to them they’ve like been planning it"

guess she just isnt comfortable rejecting someone flat out so just makes excuses. the night i met her, her girl friends were giving her shit for being really unreliable with plans. i should have realized to stay away then. she was really unreliable and canceled twice back when we were hooking up without asking for another time to meet. yet we still went out again after that and hooked up. shes just a really dumb slut i suppose. oh well, time to move on.