Sister’s best friend has crush on me but flaked! My plan



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PostPosted: Tue Jan 19, 2010 7:44 pm 
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Someday... someday I too will be analyzed by kasabi. But for now, I thought it was hilarious that R.Swerve's idea for enticing her with a fun time (as per kasabi) was to write her a five paragraph essay and leave her a voicemail saying he wanted to talk. That sounded so not fun I stopped reading there. No offense, I'm just an a-hole.


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PostPosted: Tue Jan 19, 2010 11:57 pm 
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The email that I wrote her is particularly embarrassing. I really spilled my guts and wrote some pretty stupid stuff in there.
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So what?

The other day, I was walking around Barnes and Nobles. After some careful inspection of the aisles, I ripped a fart that would make an 800lb gorilla proud. Within seconds, a pair of cute ladies walked by and kept on walking. I turned and saw both of them IMMEDIATELY bring their fingers to their nose.

So what?
This doesn't help. You're comparing apples and oranges. Do you have a 20 year history with either of the girls from Barnes & Noble? Will either of these girls continue to be in your life? You think these girls are cute but do you really KNOW either of them and REALLY LIKE either of them? If I embarrassed myself in front of a complete stranger or even someone that I've only known for a brief period of time, I would brush it off and quickly forget about it. In fact, I’ve had really bad gas for the past couple of weeks and I’m sure my coworkers have noticed. Doesn’t really bother me.
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Think of a girl that you had a HUGE crush on when you were younger. Imagine that you ran into her today and she was 400 pounds with 10 kids, what a disappointment! I feel like I’m the 400 pound women with 10 kids, like I've really disappointed this girl who had a HUGE crush on me. WHEN I really get my act together (I know I still have a ways to go), will she realize that I was just going through a really bad phase in my life (a divorce) and wasn't acting like my usual self? Will I be able to get the frame back that I once had (her dream guy)?
Quote:
So what?

You're a beautiful man . . . I mean that. You have a big heart. But you don't ALWAYS have to play "big brother". You don't always have to be strong, take care of your kid sister, and be there to entertain the young kids ALL THE TIME. Jeesh, do you really feel the need to improve your sister's friend's fantasy perception of you? Don't worry, your sister won't think any less of you. If you have always been the way you are now, your sister's a lucky girl.
I know my sister doesn't think any less of me. Initially, I was concerned about what she and her friends thought but I'm over that. I'm only concerned with what the girl that I like thinks. I am concerned about her perception of me because when you're crazy about a girl, it's a lot more fun when she's crazy about you too.

I have been getting some tail and will continue to
Quote:
Go out and get yourself some tail.
I recognize that I still have oneitis but I'm not going to put my life on hold for this girl. I will continue to pursue other girls in the meantime, but ultimately I would like things to work out with this girl.

Also, thank you for the kind words Kasabi. I appreciate them.


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PostPosted: Wed Jan 20, 2010 12:04 am 
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This doesn't help.
Come on . . . do you want me to list EVERY embarrassing story that I have for you? EVERYBODY has got them.

So FUCKING what . . .

Start laughing already . . .


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PostPosted: Wed Jan 20, 2010 1:18 am 
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Do it! List them all. Start with the one where you sodomized that model until she lost control of her bowels and you both started spewing uncontrollably. I love that one! (Tucker Max)

Oh! Serious question. Why is texting "Boooooooo" to show disappointment a bad idea? It's not very intellectual, but it concisely gets the point across. How are you supposed to punish a girl for flaking? (Punish as in to show her you don't approve and make her less likely to do it.)

And R. Swerve, you came here for help, let people help you for shit's sake.


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PostPosted: Wed Feb 24, 2010 4:29 am 
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Ok, now that I have been having some success with other girls and am no longer in such a needy state, all your advice and the reality of my situation is sinking in. My mistakes led me to believe that I dug myself into a big hole. This made me panic and behave even worse. I felt like I needed to run some flawless MPUA game and increase her fantasy perception of me to get myself out.

The reality is I’m not in a huge hole. I believe that she still likes me. I just need to get her to go do something fun with me. I’m sure we’ll have a good time so I don’t think escalating kino and k-closing will be a problem.

She’s been on vacation for awhile. My plan is to suggest doing something fun and low key a week or two after she gets back. I’ll act like I just want to hang out and won’t make it seem like a date or anything. If she’s busy, I’ll suggest a couple other times to hang out that would work for me. Sound good?


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PostPosted: Wed Aug 10, 2011 8:54 am 
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I haven't posted on this thread for a year and a half.

BRIEF RECAP:
After my long term relationship ends, I start to pursue my little sister's best friend who has had a huge crush on me since she was like 12. My life is kind of a mess and I don't know shit about game...so I totally fuck it up! I even end up writing her a gay ass love letterish type email. She rejects me and the roles are reversed. Now I'm the one with the crush.

UPDATE:
Over the last year and a half I have gotten my life together, moved to a new city, and have developed some pretty solid pua skills.

For awhile I kind of avoided my sister's best friend and moved on. I stopped acting like an afc but she was still pretty flaky. On several occasions she texted me out of the blue, then I would respond with a question or suggested getting a drink and I would get no response from her. It seemed like she was playing games and it turned me off so I stopped contacting her (my sis told me once that things never work out with her friend and guys because she's pretty flaky). Then I moved to another city and we started texting a little here and there.

Recently, I went home to visit for a week and she pursued me pretty hard. She stopped by the house, texted me a lot, and tried to get me to meet her and my sis out. I met her, my sis, and another one of their friends out one night one night at a bar. My confidence was pretty high, given the fact that she was pursuing me. When I arrived, I sat down next to her and immediately put my arm around her for a brief period. We had a drink there and then went to another bar. We got a table and I sat down next to her again. As we all talked I was close to her and was holding seductive eye contact. I grabbed her hand under the table, let go, put my hand on her lower back a few times. Then my sister and the other friend left for another room in the bar. I immediately grabbed her hand again. She turned to me and said she was very attracted to me but didn't want my sister to be mad at her. I ignored this comment and started caressing her hand and forearm. She threw some tests at me and I just smirked and ignored them. I was kind of sick and told her that I wanted to kiss her but wasn't going to. I told her it would have to wait for another night. She was melting, getting very close, we were touching each other a lot. I put her hand on my leg, then on my dick. She came in to be kissed. She wanted kissed so bad whether I was sick or not. I kissed her. We made out in the bar, joked about how tacky it was, and made out some more. It was awesome. It was awesome that we were finally getting somewhere after all this time.

We then walked around the bar and met up with my sis and her other friend. They saw us making out. My sis gave me a little shit but in a joking way. We all left as the bar was about to close. My sis and her friends left in a separate car since they drove there together. When I get home my sis is there. I get a text from her friend saying she wants to see me. I text back saying I'll stop over her place. My sis asks me where I'm going and I tell her to walk the dog (the dog is in his cage in another room). My sister tells me not to go to her friend’s place. I leave and go to her friend’s place. All the lights are off. The front door is unlocked so I just walk in. I go to her room and climb in her bed where she is asleep. I touch her slowly to wake her up and we start going at it. I try to go down on her but she won't let me because she is due for a waxing the next day. I feel down there and she is not lying. She says to wait until the following night. I may have been able to pass this resistance but I didn't feel the need to. It was an awesome night. We kept alternating between messing around and joking around all night, and barely got any sleep. We had amazing chemistry.

The next night she stopped over for dinner, then I went back to her place and we watched one of our favorite TV shows. We started messing around a little. She said she wanted me to stay over but she really needed to get some sleep because she had work the next day. I was really tired myself because we were up all night the previous night. I elected to not try and push past her resistance and left. I told her to rest up because I would see her the following night.

Shortly after I left, I got a text from her saying she was questioning her judgment and kind of wanted me in her bed. Looking back, I interpret this as an invitation to let myself in and climb in her bed like I did the previous night. But I didn't. I was tired like I mentioned, but I also let my pride get in the way. I didn't want to go back there after she had just told me to leave. Instead I texted her telling her to rest up because I might have to wake her up the following night (lame).

The following night I text her asking if she's up for a drink. She said she's working late but definitely the following night.

The next night she says she's working late again and doesn't know when she'll be done.

The following night I try again but don't suggest drinks this time. I suggest something more fun and creative...ice cream and a scary movie! No response from her. I text her again saying it's my last night in town so I'm going to have to insist on seeing her. No response from her.

I have a few ideas on what happened:

First, I should have stayed over the second night no matter how tired I was. And after I got the text about her wanting me in her bed, I should have gone over and GOT IN HER BED! I shouldn't have let my pride get in the way. And things were going so well that I took this opportunity for granted. I forgot how flaky this girl had been in the past.

Why did she flake on me the following nights?

This is just my theory but I think she was protecting herself from getting hurt. She knew if we got alone again she would let herself get fucked and then I would go back to my new home on the other side of the country. And she knows I've been playing the field back here.

Another theory: A pua coach told me once that some girls act really flaky on purpose when they like a guy, in an attempt to get him more invested. They go back and forth between two ends of the spectrum, chasing him really hard and then acting really flaky. This girl definitely has a pattern of this behavior and after some time I expect her to start chasing me again.

I guess it's possible that her worrying about my sister getting mad could have played a role but I doubt it. My sister probably wasn't thrilled but she didn't seem all that mad.

Even though we live in different cities now, I wouldn’t mind seeing where it goes with this girl. We’ve known each other for a long time and have amazing chemistry. But I'm not planning on contacting her at all. I feel like I need to freeze her out and I expect her to contact me again like she always does anyway. I'm just not sure how I should react when she does contact me.

What do you guys think about what happened and where I should go from here?


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PostPosted: Wed Aug 10, 2011 5:06 pm 
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Quote:
I haven't posted on this thread for a year and a half.

BRIEF RECAP:
After my long term relationship ends, I start to pursue my little sister's best friend who has had a huge crush on me since she was like 12. My life is kind of a mess and I don't know shit about game...so I totally fuck it up! I even end up writing her a gay ass love letterish type email. She rejects me and the roles are reversed. Now I'm the one with the crush.

UPDATE:
Over the last year and a half I have gotten my life together, moved to a new city, and have developed some pretty solid pua skills.

For awhile I kind of avoided my sister's best friend and moved on. I stopped acting like an afc but she was still pretty flaky. On several occasions she texted me out of the blue, then I would respond with a question or suggested getting a drink and I would get no response from her. It seemed like she was playing games and it turned me off so I stopped contacting her (my sis told me once that things never work out with her friend and guys because she's pretty flaky). Then I moved to another city and we started texting a little here and there.

Recently, I went home to visit for a week and she pursued me pretty hard. She stopped by the house, texted me a lot, and tried to get me to meet her and my sis out. I met her, my sis, and another one of their friends out one night one night at a bar. My confidence was pretty high, given the fact that she was pursuing me. When I arrived, I sat down next to her and immediately put my arm around her for a brief period. We had a drink there and then went to another bar. We got a table and I sat down next to her again. As we all talked I was close to her and was holding seductive eye contact. I grabbed her hand under the table, let go, put my hand on her lower back a few times. Then my sister and the other friend left for another room in the bar. I immediately grabbed her hand again. She turned to me and said she was very attracted to me but didn't want my sister to be mad at her. I ignored this comment and started caressing her hand and forearm. She threw some tests at me and I just smirked and ignored them. I was kind of sick and told her that I wanted to kiss her but wasn't going to. I told her it would have to wait for another night. She was melting, getting very close, we were touching each other a lot. I put her hand on my leg, then on my dick. She came in to be kissed. She wanted kissed so bad whether I was sick or not. I kissed her. We made out in the bar, joked about how tacky it was, and made out some more. It was awesome. It was awesome that we were finally getting somewhere after all this time.

We then walked around the bar and met up with my sis and her other friend. They saw us making out. My sis gave me a little shit but in a joking way. We all left as the bar was about to close. My sis and her friends left in a separate car since they drove there together. When I get home my sis is there. I get a text from her friend saying she wants to see me. I text back saying I'll stop over her place. My sis asks me where I'm going and I tell her to walk the dog (the dog is in his cage in another room). My sister tells me not to go to her friend’s place. I leave and go to her friend’s place. All the lights are off. The front door is unlocked so I just walk in. I go to her room and climb in her bed where she is asleep. I touch her slowly to wake her up and we start going at it. I try to go down on her but she won't let me because she is due for a waxing the next day. I feel down there and she is not lying. She says to wait until the following night. I may have been able to pass this resistance but I didn't feel the need to. It was an awesome night. We kept alternating between messing around and joking around all night, and barely got any sleep. We had amazing chemistry.

The next night she stopped over for dinner, then I went back to her place and we watched one of our favorite TV shows. We started messing around a little. She said she wanted me to stay over but she really needed to get some sleep because she had work the next day. I was really tired myself because we were up all night the previous night. I elected to not try and push past her resistance and left. I told her to rest up because I would see her the following night.

Shortly after I left, I got a text from her saying she was questioning her judgment and kind of wanted me in her bed. Looking back, I interpret this as an invitation to let myself in and climb in her bed like I did the previous night. But I didn't. I was tired like I mentioned, but I also let my pride get in the way. I didn't want to go back there after she had just told me to leave. Instead I texted her telling her to rest up because I might have to wake her up the following night (lame).

The following night I text her asking if she's up for a drink. She said she's working late but definitely the following night.

The next night she says she's working late again and doesn't know when she'll be done.

The following night I try again but don't suggest drinks this time. I suggest something more fun and creative...ice cream and a scary movie! No response from her. I text her again saying it's my last night in town so I'm going to have to insist on seeing her. No response from her.

I have a few ideas on what happened:

First, I should have stayed over the second night no matter how tired I was. And after I got the text about her wanting me in her bed, I should have gone over and GOT IN HER BED! I shouldn't have let my pride get in the way. And things were going so well that I took this opportunity for granted. I forgot how flaky this girl had been in the past.

Why did she flake on me the following nights?

This is just my theory but I think she was protecting herself from getting hurt. She knew if we got alone again she would let herself get fucked and then I would go back to my new home on the other side of the country. And she knows I've been playing the field back here.

Another theory: A pua coach told me once that some girls act really flaky on purpose when they like a guy, in an attempt to get him more invested. They go back and forth between two ends of the spectrum, chasing him really hard and then acting really flaky. This girl definitely has a pattern of this behavior and after some time I expect her to start chasing me again.

I guess it's possible that her worrying about my sister getting mad could have played a role but I doubt it. My sister probably wasn't thrilled but she didn't seem all that mad.

Even though we live in different cities now, I wouldn’t mind seeing where it goes with this girl. We’ve known each other for a long time and have amazing chemistry. But I'm not planning on contacting her at all. I feel like I need to freeze her out and I expect her to contact me again like she always does anyway. I'm just not sure how I should react when she does contact me.

What do you guys think about what happened and where I should go from here?

You had your chance. You didn't take it.

You live in different cities. I just don't see why you would want to explore anything with a girl who lives a fair distance away from where you are.

Also, the whole "I got better at pick up" that's a lie. You kept on messaging her over and over, after that night you didn't go over. You had to stick to your frame, be indifferent, NOT submit your power to her.

It's not the girl, but her vagina which made you bow down and acknowledge what you called " a mistake". Well, it wasn't. You're a man and you had your pride to keep. And you were doing great, until you weren't.

My advice? Forget this girl. She's nothing but a waste of time. A girl who cannot make her decisions isn't good for anyone or anything.

Find someone near you and focus your energy on her. Will serve you better.

Good luck.

_________________
" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "


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