I was with a girl for about 2 years. She was deeply, DEEPLY in love with me and very needy. So much so that it scared the hell out of me and i broke up with her about three times. Every time i did she would eventually find a way to get back with me, even though tbh i didnt want to.
At some point in all this though she changed. As she changed and became less needy i saw better qualities in her and lately i realised that i do actually love this girl, and i would give up pua and have a relationship.

As she became less needy though, she changed. This was a lot down to her pill, which she said changed her emotional state, and its true, iv seen this happen before. Over a few months we had hardly seen each other or connected and eventually we started argueing and she broke it off.

My first question...
Once a womans mind is made up, is there any changing it?

We met up yesterday and i told her how i felt, but in a positive way. I said i understand why she broke it up , which i do, and that whatever happened between us im happy for her. She said she could never go back and she kept a firm guard up.
I kept a strong frame, was positive about everything. Non needy. She mentioned that she would like to sleep with me but cant. At that point i dropped the ball a bit and said we should have sex. Aside from that though, aside from telling her how i felt, i was just joking around, cocky, attractive alpha. Women are creatures of habit, and easily manipulated, so is there a way to hijack her brain. Her friends, family have obviously drilled into her this is a bad idea. Looking at it though, its a gd idea. We both love each other and im in the right place now. Girls unfortunately give TERRIBLE advice.

My second question....
From experience , is there a way of getting a girl back?
Girls do it to guys by crying, using sex , generally they get their way eventually. If a guy starts begging, being needy, its the biggest turn off ever. So this is what im going to do.
Be the best person i can be. Be completely non needy with her. Go out, meet women, sharpen my skills so that im a 10, inside and out. There is a club she is going to at some point and im going there with some friends saturday. My aim is to game the whole place, male and female and generally make myself such an attractive proposition to any woman, that it would be stupid for anyone to break up with me.

My Third question.
How much contact is best to have?
She text me after we saw each other "Thanks so much for the drink, i know you'll do well"
Pretty patronising huh lol!!
I havent text back yet. Could really do with knowing how much contact to have from this point, and what to say when i do make contact. Should i try and see her again soon? I go away for a week next week. If i see her my plan is just to have fun, not talk about me and her at all, and generally be the man. The guy any woman would kill their best friend to be with.

Im a gd looking guy btw, im ripped, i have my own sucessful company in the field of TV , a luxuary penthouse apartment , and i travel all over the world. Not bragging here, but giving some background.

Would really appreciate some feedback here from some pro's and thanks in advance for your interest

They way you guys broke up, was good, non needy or anything AFC-Like.
Best Solution for now is to leave the girl alone for a while.
Dont do this because of her, do this because of you.

Dont be angry at the girl or anything like that.. if you fell like calling her after a couple of weeks or even seeing her, then dude go for it..

Just because you broke up, doesnt mean you cant hook up again, the important part is the way you guys broke up, if you handled that like a man, you may always get back to gaming that women.

Don’t generalize like this, people are different. Think about what you just said: hijacking her brain? Didn’t you say you love her?

Have you ever thought that your ex can actually think on her own and make decision?
You are in denial; you first blame it on the pill, then you blame it on her friends and family… what about the case in which she might have realized that she just don’t want to be with you because she doesn’t feel happy ?
Do that, but do it for yourself.

Don’t be egocentric; she was just trying to be nice.

She is obviously still attracted to you, but she has also realized a lot of things. Once she has set herself free she can see it from a distance and obviously she has made her decision.

If you really love her like you say, don’t be an egoist and for once let her choose. You’ve laid your cards down on the table, learn to respect her ways and desires.

Also, are you sure that you don’t want her back only because you can’t have her anymore? Think about that …


Cheers
Jez

_________________
“A man is but the product of his thoughts what he thinks, he becomes.”

Look. I understand where you are coming from, but thats from a female perspective. And females are experts in the field of getting BF's back. Men arent allowed to do this. They literally arent allowed to show emotion at this stage.

Peoples minds can be changed , women do it ALL the time. Men however are told that once a woman's mind is made up they have to accept that blah blah blah.
Meanwhile, the girls friends, are giving TERRIBLE advice to the girl. Advice they would never take themselves.


Logically, if i am in a gd place now for a relationship, and she has matured to the point where she is not so needy , and i have a deep respect for her. Then if we love each other, it could be a good thing for us to have a proper relationship.

People do break up and get back together, sometimes it is right , sometimes it isnt and i have been through tons of break ups and am friends with 99% of the women. On this occasion though, i know in my heart that this isnt normal behaviour for the girl, and i would like to try and make it work.

The problem with being a guy is that we cant appear wussy. Most guys will NEVER confide in their friends how they feel about a girl, they would rather keep it bottled up. That is why women are so good with guys. I can happily express my feelings and what i want, so please don't view this purely from the perspective of what long term gf is saying right now.

Thank you

Thats good advice bro and i am doing it for myself more than anything else. And i am genuinely happy that i have ended it on good terms and didnt become a wuss. And happy that i can learn something from the situation.

From now, how do you think i should reply to the text, or should i just leave it.
I want to appear neutral to her , not hit on her, not be wierd. Just completely normal , but still as a very attractive high value male.
So i want to break contact, but still leave the thought in her head that it could be a mistake...

Cheers bro, you guys are the best.

My 2 cents.

I think you're putting way too much inphasis on the text. Why not say some simple like "you're welcome. But (friday, sunday whatever day) it's your turn to buy! "

Stop thinking of her as your ex you're still in love with and think of her as a girl you've hooked and now you gotta keep giving her good game.

Like I said "my 2 cents"... for what its worth.

Cheers dude. I kind of think if we arrange to meet for a meal or whatever then she is going to think im trying to get back with her, and run a mile!

Its a real tough one and i have been thinking a lot about this, and about my game, which is pretty gd. Im 2 years in and can comfortably close 90% of sets.

I had an HB10 who i broke up with and she found out what club i was going to and turned up looking HOT, i mean smoking, u would slap your mother just to stroke this girls hair hot.

I was with another girl, but she made mincemeat of her lol, cornered me and started crying and telling me how she felt. AND IT WORKED!!!

We slept together and we had a really good 3 months before she moved to uni and it was just too far to make it happen.

Women really get the monopoly on this, which is why i love game so much. All i am wondering, is there a male equivelent of what she did? Is there a way to game her and make her regret letting it go, or making her want you so bad sexually that she gives in to the side of her brain letting her do this, and goes with her heart.

All i can do is learn at this stage, im in a good place

Advice appreciated as always

Man you're complicating so fucking much.
You dont even know what the fuck you want. First decide what you want and go for it. But dont change your mind in two weeks just because she's hot and wants to give you a blowjob.

If you broke up with her be just a friend. If you're a fuckbuddy be that but dont mix all together.
Be a man and decide your mind.

_________________
"They're playing groupie, so I'm playing rock star." (mystery)

I was quite clear that i want to get back with her bro. But i want her to want me, to desire me like she did.
If you look on any women forums. When it tells them to get a man back, it mentions making friends with his friends, finding out where he will be. Reminding him how much you meant to him. Its insane that women are so manipulative but reserve the right to change their mind over something and have the man not make any action, or he is to be called a wuss.

So yea, id like to get back with her, im looking at a few months of freeze out. Does anyone have anything better than this?

Harry_D ,

I can pretty much relatie with you. I had a 2 year relationship that ended in the beginning of December (2009). First I acted all AFC about it, begging her to take me back, demanding explanations, trying to change her mind with reason, etc...

Until after a month I decided it couldn't go one like that anymore. I stopped texting and calling her, deleted her fb... In short, I banned her out of my life(though I still love her and want her back) . I didn't even send her "a-Happy-New-Years" text after she sent me one.

I couldn't foresee the psychological effect of these actions. After 2 days she texted me this : "Will you ever be able to forgive me?" and other emotional stuff. This continued for a few days until I gave in. Now we have contact on a daily basis and she tells me her feelings for me are practically unchanged. However, when I ask her to come back together, she says she can't because she hasn't have faith in it. (BTW, if any of you can give me some tips on how to win back her trust, I'd be much obliged. (I was never unfaithful))

What I am trying to say here is that you wont win her back by reasoning with her. Women are emotional beings and you should try to trigger her emotions. Block her out of your life for a few days or weeks and show her you moved on. If she notices your changes, chances are she texts or phones you to meet or something like that.

Cheerio

Why do you want to get back with her?
Do you love her? Are you horny? Are you needy?
I mean if you love her you wouldnt break up with her 3 times or so.

You're in wussyville right now. When you fuck up with a girl, it's very hard to get back from the wussyville. You're be better of with new girl. And believe me there are millions that are FAR more better looking than she is and FAR better person than she is.

It will take so much of your precious time and life energy that if you would know right now how much energy you must spend to get back with some girl you already fucked up with...you would run away form her as fast as you can.

No offense bro I'm just trying to help you, but I think you're in a dangerous ONEITIS zone. Dont go there. It will fuck you up, believe me I was there 2 times already and I learned my lesson now. Dont learn this the hard way.

In 98% when some guy is trying to get back with some girl he had rough time with, it's a bad decision.

Just think about it...if she would be so perfect for you than you wouldnt had any problems with her anyway.

_________________
"They're playing groupie, so I'm playing rock star." (mystery)

Fair.
But no relationship is perfect. And there is nothing wussy with a guy saying he wants a girl. This girl is a 10. She was Miss ******* in the city im from. And i did what most guys do and gave her no emotional connection and just used her for sex, without properly getting to know her.
I have been out gaming every night, meeting new women, improving myself. I havent been sitting around in wussville, and i havent even contacted her. My pick up has got loads better and i'm moving forwards with everything.

I still want to know though, that in the long run i could have her back. That even if she is with someone else, she would still have attraction for me. Not lose it.
And to do that i need to play the game correctly.
My concern is that over the last two months ,when she avoided seeing me. She was already breaking it up, and wasnt telling me so that we kept in contact and she got emotional support, without the physical. The same as girls always do when they break up with a guy.

So i want to handle this right, so if at some point in the future we are in the same place, she would get back with me. If she thinks im a wuss, then it would just never happen.

You saw the text she sent. Do you think i need to reply and tell her i am happy we have left things, or just continue a freeze out?

Thanks
CB