unspoken relationship. we kiss we hug we hang

she called me and sounded sad I tried to cheer her up, no response so i asked her if i could call her back.
hang up

I call her again she sounds sad or something the first thing i say is "i dont think this is gonna work"

then she says "I cant talk to anybody right now"
and hangs up

i throw my phone but it survived so i rethink a little and I figure i have no reason to be mad. i text her saying: "if your lonely you can talk to me" its from the Beatles "hey bulldog" she doesn't know that.
at the same time that i send it she texts "try living my life in my shoes and then tell me what wouldn't work"
don't ask about it... its her business.
anyway she responds to mine before i respond to her she says :after what you said, no thanks. for me that meant she was thinking about what i told her and was open for discussion

anyway I tell her "why dont you think it would work?"

she says "you said it not me"(i think now that she meant she thinks it would work im an idiot"

i say "ok thats fair"

then i send another text saying "you couldn't handle being with me"

she says "what are you conceited o" (her exact words i cant figure out what the o means if shes trying to say conceited-o like a tease or if shes saying oh ...texting is lame for that reason. bad grammar)

first I text "lol"
then I text her "Im a bad boyfriend. Im needy : ) you have no chance" and thats where it ends. 9:00 pm
funny thing tho, my ex sent me a text after 2 months i didnt reply instead

I woke up at 2:34 am no reply but i felt kinda sad and i sent the girl a text sayin "awake?"
no reply so i replied to my exes text, I didn't know who it was at first so i asked
her roomate answered for her saying she must have texted me. her text was "hey nicker... : ) how was your day?"

i said "fine thanks who is this"

Then in the morning when i woke up i sent the girl (not my ex) a text saying "I slept on it and i think we would make a good couple. cheer up ill tell you why later."

My course of action is this... I'm gonna wait for contact from her. She has two of my favorite books i let her borrow like 2 days ago so im probably gonna have to accept that those are gone...

ahhh my books

PUAs! in exchange for some advice i offer this piece of advice: buy two copies of books so you can let girls borrow them and not worry about it. not just books, bracelets, necklaces, guitars, always have two of eberything. if its socks have four...

haha

I'm no expert, but why the hell would you think it would be a good idea to neg/push someone who's feeling depressed? Seems like it was a bad time to try to use pick up on her.

Yeah i came on here again to check for responses.

only one and yes you're right.
you got good instinct buddy, unlike me.




I'm offering more advice in exchange for some:

If someone's sad leave them alone. unless they ask for you. then over-dramatization is a good route to take. she says shes sad, you say Oh WOE IS ME IM SO SAD BECAUSE HEARING YOUR SAD STORY MAKES ME SAD I THINK I MIGHT DIE OH NO I THINK IM HAVING A HEART ATTACK IM SO SAD

If talking in person, really fake the heart attack. on the phone drop the phone and make heart attack noises.

(for extra effect on the phone bang some pots and smash some things and when you get back on the phone be panting and say "i fought it off for now... but it'll be back! with a vengeance or something-- basically act like you fought a life sized heart with legs and arms and you won. for now.)

obviously to be funny so always laugh afterward. assuming she laughs always laugh longer than her.
if she doesn't laugh ask

who died?

then turn on the sympathetic ear buddy

still no advice for me? I'm a firm believer of "Give before you take" so here's another.

You've all heard the line "beauty is common" and many use it to respond to the question "Am I pretty?" Or disarming pretty women.

The same works for girls that are sad.

Tell her, "everyone has a sad story what makes you different from everybody else?"

honestly its true. some girls claim to have the biggest problems in the world so they know better from experience, when in fact everybody has a sad story to compete with the next...

sometimes it works to act like they are a special case but think about the girls that use sadness for attention. what do you do then?

unless its absolutely the saddest thing you ever heard, don't feel bad for your own sake. they've done enough of it for themselves.

If a girl is sad and calling you just listen to what she has to say and try to offer her a perspective. Honestly if a friend pulled that woe is me crap when I was genuinely having a moral dilemma I'd be likely to direct the anger that way instead of focusing on making it better. Don't cheer her up in a buddy buddy way but be frank and listen, good luck. If she's genuinely using sadness for attention and you don't know her very well then call her on her shit and move on. Idk about you but I generally adapt a no bullshit mantra unless it's a friend or something more serious. Just listen and react, don't push.

_________________
"All the dragons in our lives are perhaps princesses expecting us to be handsome and brave, all the terrifying things are perhaps nothing but helpless things waiting for us to help them." Rilke

Hey man that makes sense. Thank you for your advice, I'll take it.

woo I'm good thanks for the advice from you both!