| The following is a copy/paste from another forum:
*This is a super long post but probably well worth the read if you DO NOT understand Shanghai Night clubs . . .
To me, Shanghai ranks as one of the more foreigner friendly night-life cities in the World. Unfortunately, newbies seem to either stand around alone, give up and go home, or as evidenced by the “Muse Fight” thread, resort to a Kung Fu contest. So . . . in hopes of improving social lives and International ties, I give you . . . the Shanghai Night Club Primer. And unlike my pick-up series, this one’s the real deal. Obviously, there are many different ways to befriend others so this is only a general guideline of one possible strategy.
Phase I. Assembling an Instant Social Network
A) Identify:
Any random table in a club will typically hold the following characters:
Men:
1. The Leader: This is the alpha male who typically picks up the tab. Even if the group goes “Dutch”, he’s the guy who ends paying more than others. He seldom gets up from his throne and is usually found playing drinking games with the hottest girl on the table. He always sits in a position where it’s easy for him to see everything that’s going on.
2. The Henchmen: These are the social and playful guys that hit the dance floor often and also do a bit of cross-socializing with other tables. They’re usually found on the edge of sofas or standing within close vicinity of their table.
3. The drunkard: This is the quiet type who compensates for his lack of social skills by sitting close to the Leader and drinking heavily. If he likes you he goes, “What’s up.” If he dislikes you he goes, “fu:(k you.”
Women:
1. The Queen: The Leader’s girlfriend. (Usually is NOT the leader of women however)
2. The Diva: The leader of women. Talkative and throws plenty of exaggerated facial and hand gestures . . . the other girls follow her around everywhere.
3. The Bridesmaids: The rest of the girls other than . . .
4. The Outcast: There’s always one “little sister” or a social mouse who tags along. Nobody talks to her until some guy, especially a whitey, hits on her thinking as if she’s an “easy target”. She’s like the cheese on a mouse trap that wakes everybody up at night when it trips.
B) Initial Contact: (Do NOT have any drinks in your hand)
First rule. You don’t talk to anybody who is sitting down while you’re standing up. If you do, you’ll either force the guy/gal to stare at your crotch or to avoid this, you'd have to crouch down like some goofy Applebee’s waiter. So . . .
Begin first with the Henchman(men) who is standing close to his table. If you’re socially tuned in, go with your natural conversation style. If you’re not, here’s something you can try:
“Are you by any chance with the birthday/bachelor/engagement/promotion party? My buddy called me up to join the _______ party and I can’t find them anywhere. . . not sure if they already moved on to another place or what . . . “ - Progress this to a simple conversation and introduce yourself. DO NOT forget names. If you didn’t hear correctly, ask again.
C) “I come in peace . . . I’m on YOUR TEAM!”
You don’t make friends by pointing out a girl on the Henchman’s table asking, “Is she available?” No . . . this is like telling him, “I am an alien and I am here to abduct your nubile virgins!” 100% ignore everybody on his table for now.
Instead, you make friends by pointing to ANOTHER table telling him, “Wow, those ladies are HOT! . . .or That girl is really beautiful!” Henchman will agree. He needs to show you that he is a man and he too appreciates beautiful women. Take this opportunity to do some of that American style “high five” crap and further progress to “Let’s go get those girls TOGETHER” . . . . “Hey, which one’s your favorite?
D) Pick Up Challenge - “I will work for our team.”
This is when you demonstrate willingness to add value to your newfound friendship.
You: Alright, I’m going in.
Henchman: Going in where?
You: Well, I’m going over there and talking those ladies up. I’m going to hook you up with the girl you like . . . you down with that? . . . “ (Perfectly fine to be goofy to this guy)
Henchman: Go for it. You’re cool. Alright. You try your best . . . (Stuff like that)
Your GOAL here is not to actually pick the other girls up. Your goal is to demonstrate your willingness to add value to the henchman’s group. So all you need to do is go to the other table and at least look as if you’re talking to those other ladies. (You’re breaking all the rules here but if you have game, you still have a shot of bringing those ladies back so do your best. Just go right up and initiate conversation and suggest we try one drink at YOUR table.)
If “yes”, this is very good; Skip to “Poaching Other Tables” (I’ll type this up another time) If no, just smile and come right back to the henchman.
D) “Take Me To Your Leader”
You’ve just proved yourself to be “one of the gang” because success/failure wasn’t the point. The important thing is that you fought for the RIGHT team. The henchman is probably laughing (but most likely WITH YOU) So now, you clutch your heart and go, “Oh, she broke my heart. I need a drink!” - And you look around for the bar, shake your head, etc . . .
The Henchman doesn’t want you to go at this point. He’ll instantly grab you a drink from the table. Don’t just stand there and watch him. Take this time to scope out an empty spot on the table, tap the Henchman on the shoulder, and point to the seat, “Is it cool to sit here?”
A talented henchman will typically do the intro’s now. If he’s slow, just ask him loudly, “Hey, how do you all know each other?” (Pay attention now . . . the henchman will often tell you which of the girls are hitched or single)
When he introduces you to the girls, a quick nod or shake and a “nice to meet you” is good for now. If the Diva ignores you, ignore her. If she tries to steal your time to better figure you out, keep conversations with her ultra short for now. Don’t even look at her for more than a few seconds at a time. But your frame is “I’m having so much fun meeting everybody here that I don’t have time for you. . . “
For example, The Diva asks, “Hey, what do you do?”
You: I’m a marketing manager. Oh my God! (Looking at somebody else) Are you going to drink that whole thing right now?!?! Let’s do it together! Yi, ar, san!!
When the henchman introduces you to the Drunkard, you give him some props. The guy seldom talks to anybody anyways so one compliment and a manly sideways highfive/shake and he thinks you’re cool. Done.
The Leader . . . If he has time for you, initiate boring talk about work, your apartment, Holidays, etc . . . You want to demonstrate some professionalism and you want to demonstrate that you’re not a psycho killer or a crazy pervert out to rape his group. He’ll eventually brush you off to go back to flirting with his chick, unthreatened by your presence in the group.
Summary:
This completes Phase I. You walked into the club as a horny lone wolf and you’ve managed to position yourself in a tight local table set filled with girls, guys who’ll vouch for you, and free (to you) booze. You haven’t pissed anybody off and your indifferent attitude to the girls on the table should have triggered a bit of whispering amongst them regarding the “new guy in town”.
So what’s your idea of fun? Getting 10 phone numbers for date prospects? One night stands? Hopping tables and sharing(usually being fed) drinks with nearly every table in the club? Dancing the night away with a bunch of beautiful girls? Which ever way you want to take it, “Assembling an Instant Social Network” can be in my opinion a decent launching pad for a night of fun in a Shanghai Club.
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CHAT
