I've been reading and sometimes posting here for awhile. And I noticed something which in my opinion is really interesting.
Here you can find people who were not the popular kids in school, people who didn't have the success in their relationships that they dreamed of and even people that felt really lonely just because they too shy to go out and talk to someone.
This place helps many of them to change. You can see them slowly opening up to the outside world. I think this forum is great because here they can find people who support them and always ready to tell them: "Don't worry. It's normal to encounter challenges - you should just continue.".
But I begin asking myself: "Where are the boundaries?".
It's true that here everyone can find advice on how to dress, how to walk, how to talk and generally improve their lifestyle. But soon some of them get trapped. They begin to look for advice on everything and try to substitute real life experience. They restrict themselves by refusing to learn from their own mistakes just because they are afraind that they are going to turn again into an "AFC".
They even lose the belief in their own personality and try to become like someone else. And the thing which bothers me the most - they forget WHY they started learning this in the first place.
Isn't it strange - many guys at first want to learn this skills to find love. All they want is someone to be happy with. A year later they are going to clubs every night, writing long reports on what they did and wanting advice on how they can improve their game, trying to sleep with as many women as possible and (which is much worse) they brag about it.
Is mastering the PUA skills became to some people more important than aquiring the result that will make them really happy and fulfilled?
I hope this will make you think. Sure you may say that this is a bunch of bullshit. It doesn't matter as long as some people may consider are they doing what they really want for themselves or they are doing what they think will get them acceptance and respect.

I'd say it enriches all of us (if you keep practicing). I mean at first all I wanted to do was keep learning, reading, and practicing, but now that I go out and see some results I can let that obsession die down. I see how many of us can make PUA a definition of one's life but I think of it as a glorified hobby

'The Game' started and ended with Mystery going completely schizo because he couldn't seperate 'Mystery' from his real self. That was the real message of the book - That PUA in itself is not satisfying.

I think people get so caught up in the ego trip of 'Hey! I can get laid 5x a week!' that they forget where that fits into the context of their wider life.

I fully intend to become a filthy great manwhore over the next year - however that's just one of a wider set of goals.

I also want to become better at asserting myself into social situations, which in turn ties into my professional goals. I'm getting into shape by means of training for the edinborough marathon next year. That ties into PUA, and so on and so forth. People rush into things headlong and I think that with something as seductive as becoming a PUA, people forget to apply checks and balances to that.

_________________

Fancy hitting London sometime?
MSN/email: big.mickey.c@googlemail.com

I think you have cottoned onto one of the main things about PUA that is not discussed much.. at all..

I first found out about the game from a friend of mine while i was visiting him in Prague, we went out one night and we introduced me to the whole world of sarging.. i used the "Best friends test" opener on a 2 set.. i got a great responce, from there i was hooked. Im proud to say, i was an AFC, to the bone - but since that, since learning the Pick Up is something that can be learned.. and harnessed.. walk, talk, dress, look different.. more attractive..

My firend had been into the Game for a few years by then.. and it came apparant to me that even though he had a steady gf, he couldn't help himself sarging others.. it was his addiction.

It's been about 5 months since i met him in Prague, and everyday i think about sarging, and when i get to do it again..

I use this PUA stuff as a self validation you could say - when i finished The Game, i thought boack about all those girls from high school, all those IOIs i was getting, all those good responces, and i didn't act on one of them.. because i was just so AFC, i look back at it - im a wiser person now, i have a good career ahead of me.. and now i plan to get all those special moments with women i missed out on just a year ago..

However, i do have my barriers in place, my job. I work on an oil rig (PM me if you have questions, i've had a few already) so i'm away from the real world for a little bit.. its good.. and bad at the same time.. 3 weeks off - 3 weeks of out sarging.. then 2 weeks on the rig.. no women, only this site and the gym (and a LOT OF PORN)...

I could see myself ending up just like Mystery if i didn't do what i do..

-Illusionist-

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"They were right when they said "just be yourself" they just never told you what "self" to be.." - Gunwitch

I'd say I've learned a bit upon discovering PUA and figures it's helped me try to help one of my friends out.

It depends on your own perception.

Are you looking for who you are, a stereotype to fit into, a way to understand who you really are... Then you risk letting PUA define who you are. You risk trying to fit into the role so much that you adopt stuff that really isnt compatible with your personality at all. Example, you might not wanna be a player but you behave like one because you think it is expected.

That is not good.

If you let it enrich your life you risk getting stuck and avoid practicing as soon as it gets a bit difficult. You are not giving enough importance to the PUA teachings.

That is not good.

A balance is best man.

Unless of course you are a PUA. A real one a PUA that others can model themselves after. So what is a PUA? Is it Mystery, Adam Lyons, Ross Jefferies? Those people are all mPUAs and very different from one another. They all personify their own take on PU. I would say that if you are really good, PUA doesnt define who you are. YOU define what PUA is.

Ezo

I think the PU Arts unveil a whole aspect of social interaction that most people are not conscious of yet perform anyways. It is in this sense literally an art, since it is attempting to take nature (being social) and refine it, adapt it to your self, and then present it in a new and skillful way.

I also agree with the sentiment that this can be applied in many ways and help in your professional life. If you present yourself as being alpha, then people are more likely to take you seriously, you can say more with fewer words and actually get results in your professional life, and you can get what you want easier because beta males and females are hardwired to comply with the requests of an alpha male.

As an anecdotal story, the other night I was at a bar. Two HB8-10's were hanging out with this suave looking guy, but he was so AFC it was retarded. If I had not already been completely hammered (I wasn't intending on sarging) and in a serious conversation with a friend I would have gone over and blown him out. His two friends were both dancing together, a blond and brunette, while he sat 15 feet away with this helpless look on his face. Then when the brunette came to talk to him, his body language was closed, he had his hand on his face, and was even partially turned away from them. He had these two HBs and was staring at the TV as though it was going to somehow save him.

I felt bad for the guy, the point is that I would have been that guy a year ago, but my entire perspective has changed, and for that I am grateful for the PU Arts.

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Programmer of reality.

Lately, I've been really struggling to motivate myself to go out and game. But when I do I'm having amazing success, success beyond what I ever imagined I could possibly do.

I'll go out with friends, and they recognize how far I've come and love to watch me pick up girls and strike up conversations with strangers, etc. But now I can't do anything when they are around. I'm not sure if I'm scared I'll let them down if I have an off set or if I'm just frustrated with them viewing me only as a PUA.

My one friends girlfriend recently told me I'm not allowed to hit on any of her friends, because she knows what is likely going to happen. I'm considered a nice a guy by everyone know.

I wake up beside girls I don't care about and can't wait to leave and go home.

I have so much going for me in my life right now. Amazing friends, a great family, I'm in my last year of school and I just landed an incredible job for when I graduate. But I'm not truly happy right now.

How did I ever let my life get to this point?!?!?

B-Man

I think I completely understand what you are saying. Its funny for me to stumble on this post right after I've come back from a break where I was concentrating on other aspect of my life and less on PUA but still ended up getting...you know laid. I just posted this if you care: hhhheeeyy-im-back-to-the-forum-after-ne ... 57385.html

I feel I am better at getting women than I was, there's still work to be done but now I know how to at least be attractive to a certain degree and the only way is up with practice, I now feel I can start to work on other aspects of life, namely:

Learning to play my guitar properly
Reading more and increasing my intellectual capacity
Concentrating more on my art

These are my main goals as of now along with developing my skills with the opposite sex, but not such a big deal as it was as I'm pretty confident I can meet someone.

It's complimenting mine , quite nicely

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I wanto be what I was whn I wanted to be what I am now.
Except with the same lady skills