This is by far the most important topic I have ever made; it is a very long post but until I can sign up for psychological counselling I have no one else I can talk to. The only people who I can think might have an idea or the same problem as me are PUAs, people who I will probably never meet, and I hope you can empathise how lonely that thought is. It is taken me almost an hour to write this. If you read any topic of mine and never again please read this.

I believe my problem is the result of deep rooted psychological issues from a difficult childhood. I’ve no idea why this is, however I would like to give some background as without it I may never find out. As a child I was relentlessly bullied and it changed me into a cynical, untrusting guy but one who could appreciate basically any problem and turned me into a girl’s best friend – one of the best listeners around. Everyone loves a good listener. I have since changed from the cynical guy, and I can see the good in everyone, however I do have major trust issues and I never let myself get close to a girl, I can’t help it.

I have a kind of bipolar attitude to life; I think this is because I’ve never got out of the habit of having major mood swings, extreme depression when at school and feeling suicidal to coming home and forgetting everything. I am either really happy these days (but not extreme) but if things go wrong they get really bad – thankfully this is barely ever.

I decided to completely change myself when I started College, two years before university. I became the guy everyone knew, I had no trouble making friends. Being a clever guy I worked out who and how people made good friends, and adopted them qualities for myself.

The questionnaire I took to diagnose why I was constantly depressed and why I was bullied so much gave the results that I had no social skills whatsoever, so it is ironic that I am one of the most popular guys in my student accommodation. It is normally true that exceptionally clever people have trouble finding friends because it is hard to engage with people who are just not as clever as you when you are below the age of 10.

In my second year of college I realised I could get girls when I was really, really drunk, and began to drink less and less and instead my success with girls only blossomed. All of my friends found it really hard to accept me as a new ‘ladies man’ as previously I’d been all the girls’ best friend but not their lover. I stumbled across the game a few months ago and have immersed myself in the knowledge and practice. One of the main things that being a PUA has taught me is that I can choose. Before, I would get with any girl who found me attractive (a lot) but they were not necessarily attractive themselves.

At university within a month I am seeing three girls, two girls who are regarded as effortlessly pretty and a third who is my vice; my personal taste in girls – slim, tall with black hair. Only a few people know that I’m seeing three girls, as being a PUA has taught me not to blow the trumpet, so to all the boys no one knows me as a player.

However, to the problem. I seduced my third girl last night. Be funny, listen to her, playfight, kino escalate and put Doctor Who on BBC iplayer and cuddle up, she ends up staying the night. I can do this any time with any girl I want, obviously there are some failures but I know how to get any girl I want within reason. I don’t even think about seducing girls anymore, it just happens, it’s like I’ve known how to do it all my life. I can’t believe how easy it really is.

I am the most confident guy on campus, but my sexual confidence is terrible. When I am about to have sex with a different girl for the first time ever, I get really nervous and lose my erection. I do not like one night stands, yet I cannot bare the idea of a girlfriend, when I can have most girls that I want. I have only had sex with 6 girls (7 if I had got it up for the girl last night) in the past 10 months, but I lose interest in girls too easily. I am an addict of the chase. I’ve made girls fall in love with me genuinely thinking that I like them only to tire of them when they become far too needy and into me. I know I am being a bastard sometimes, but I am being an unintentional bastard. I am one of the nicest guys a girl could meet (not in the PUA term) but I fuck them over and I can’t help it. I get my sexual gratification not from sex but from making them love me, and once they do I need the attention of another girl.

One of the girls I am seeing, I think I really like, I can’t find any faults in her that I normally look for in my pursuit of perfection (which I know I will never find) but since I am a PUA I realise I do not have to settle for a girl in anyway, and that I hope I will find a girl that I am really into. But, once I get one girl I want a better girl. I see my talent as both a gift of myself and the seduction community, yet it is a curse that I can’t shake off. I know that if I had not stumbled across the seduction community I probably would have really liked this girl, and settled with her – but now I see her as settling when I can get better girls.

Here is the problem: all of the above would be absolutely fine, I have only just turned 19 and of course I have nothing to worry about over finding a girlfriend, got plenty of time, but I do not like one night stands one little bit. I hate the first time I have sex with a new girl. I don’t even like sex that much, it honestly does not bother me, I just like having sex because then I can add another number to make myself feel good in that 6 girls like me enough to have sex with me. I could be on at least 20 girls so far but I either lose interest in them before I can have sex with them or lose my erection.

I do not know what to do. Even AFCs can have sex and like it. There is nothing wrong with my frame or inner game; I know I have a high chance than getting a girl than most guys and that all girls are disposable, but is this the problem? Are all girls disposable? I can have so many girls in my bed but what good is that if I don’t want sex with them or can’t get an erection for them when it matters. I do not even care if she tells everyone I can’t get it up for her, I can just tell everyone she should have been more attractive if she is going to be mean as to spread things about me. Untrustworthy girls are people I do not want in my life, I have had enough backstabbers and shit stirrers in my life to last a lifetime.

It is really starting to depress me at a point in my life which I have been looking forward to – getting the girls I deserve and the girls that I have always wanted but never actually thought I could get, and now I can. Once I start to get depressed if I don’t control it it gets to the point where I am basically how I was, suicidal and unable to see things worth living for – even though I know I have everything to live for. These periods only last a few days as I always manage to come through but I am always fearful I will end up how I was even though it’d be illogical to do so.

I realise this is a tremendously long post and I thank you for reading it. Please reply if you have taken the time to read this, even if it is just your thoughts and you do not think it is relevant.

I've felt very similar to this just recently actually. Keeping in mind that I'm a fan of partying, I met a girl at the beginning of this college semester and we hit it off right away. I led her on more than I should have. We got sexually active but it seems that we did nothing more but party and have sex. We never hung out outside of that, which, sadly, was fine by me. She started to grow unreciprocated feelings for me and got absolutely heated and jealous when her and her friends randomly showed up at a club and saw me hooking up with another girl I had also been active with. Just last week she drunk called me around midnight on Friday and spazzed out about it. I was legit with her and told her how it was. Despite that, she goes around telling people how madly in love we are but claims that I just dont want to admit it yet.

I feel like I may be addicted to the chase too... well I don't chase, I make the girls come to me and I love it. Sometimes I think I love it too much. I never make any solid relationships with the girls I pick up. Don't get me wrong, I am not saying that is the right thing to do, it just happens over time. I usually have the intentions of keeping in touch, hanging out, and seeing where it goes, but I always find myself moving on before anything can even form.

In a way, I shot myself in the foot here. One girl I have been active with as fuckbuddies is kind of growing on me. We are nothing more than friends that have casual sex, but we act like a couple sometimes when we are out... and to tell you the truth, I kind of like that. I don't have one-itis with her in any way considering I don't obsess over her at all and I have picked up more girls since, but it's always nice to know that you have someone there for you at the end of the day.
Here is where we compare and contrast. Like you, I am very young - 20. However, I do like one night stands. I don't do it for anyone else but me. I don't see girls like numbers to show off or boost my ego, I just genuinely enjoy the thrill of picking up girls and I like to have sex. The way I see it, we're both still very young. There is no need to have relationship commitments at this very point in our lives and I think that as we age, we will grow more mature and straighten out. I have friends who are a tab bit older and they expressed that what I just said was true. They used to be "players" in their early college years, but now as they are seniors and whatnot, they have mostly settled down and dated steady girls. People just grow up and you'll fit into place soon enough.

The struggle I'm having is that I've been living this playboy lifestyle since mid high school and even though I'm only 20 and there is no need to settle down, I feel like it's time to put the playboy lifestyle away for a bit and relax... maybe not

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"Vincit Qui Se Vincit"

trixta I can see a potential cause for your erection loss. When you are with a woman, in some cases if you do not let go of your emotional barriers then your body won't be fully into the situation. Hence, if you don't have a connection with a girl you aren't going to get a full-erection. In sex there is a level of comfort/connection necessary to do it with another person. Sex is the most intimate and physically close you can get to someone. If you can't open up your mind to other people then your body very well will continue to suffer this ailment.

Thanks man, reading this makes me feel a bit better, and as for the quote below I see my exact problem.
I take a LONG time to build a connection, it can take days and sometmes weeks vbefore I feel likeI can have sex, and not just a couple of hours so that is why can't have one night stands. I am an untrusting person and this is why.
Thanks a lot for your posts, you’ll never know how much better I feel for reading them. I now see what is wrong with me and it makes a lot of sense now, more than it did anyway. I am back on top of the world again, probably for good now, I just need to learn to trust people more easily, however that’s hard when you see how easy it is to get a girl to cheat on their bf. I’ll be fine.

I didn't have time to read this, but I have to say NOBODY is "uncut" for PUA

Almost every single Mpua was, at one time, a chump, a loser, a nobody, an AFC.

I went from being laughed at in 6th grade for being fat and needy, to being the most wanted guy in my school senior year.

Point is, with determination, it can happen.

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Dude so much of your post echos what i was like and what i am like now. I am no psychiatrist or doctor but it sounds like you have depression. I was diagnosed 2 years ago. It causes mood swings, deflated mood, feelings of worthlessness and ,most importantly for this post, a loss od limbido, sex drive.

I went through the exact feelings that you have described before i was diagnosed. I was aslo majorly bullied at school and went from a social recluce to a social animal. This is a massive change and is almost a shock to the system. It brings out other social insecuritys.

MY advice as a PUA and as someone suffereing from depression is;

1.Go to your G.p (Stands for General Practitioner) ,Thats what we call them in the UK, or to your doctor and he or she will be able to give a diagnosis

2. Do more excersise. One of the reasons my body is so good is because i go to the gym alot this releases positive endorphens that are proven to combat depressive symptoms. Also Improving your body, increases confidence levels. An increase in confidence helps to increase your social status and your
social dominance. An increase in confidence helps to define and increase your self worth…which is what REALLY matters in any interaction. It will also increase your sex drive because you will literaly feel hotter.

3. In your present mental state be carefull with having 3 women on the go as its hard enough keeping one happy you dont want to fuck up and cause yourself more grief, Stick with the one you like the most.

Im also at university mate and been a practitioner of PUA artistry for a number of years so any time PM me and ill get back within a day

Hope this Helps and all the best, Saint

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Attraction is the insatiable desire to be irresistibly desired

If you don't like having sex, then don't do it. It's that simple! I don't have sex, and I see that as a personal strength, and sets me apart from the others.

I don't really enjoy sex either, but I do it to stay sane.

A wise man once said sex and friendship keep a man sane.

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THIS USER HAS BEEN BANNED FOR BREAKING RULES 2, 3, 8, AND 9

You should of really read the post then.

To Trix, since I don't have a psychological back ground, I dunno how much I can help. But if there's someone you can really trust, talk to them about your feelings, letting it off you chest in real life might be better than on the internet forum to us.

I wish you all the best man, hope you get everything sorted and come back better than ever

Helped him more than you did without even reading the post.

But all to his own opinions.

Talking to people about your "feelings" will only lower your value to them.

People of high value have no negative emotions and are always on top, always make sure to portray that.

Never tell a girl about how depressed you're feeling or how bad your day was.

Be happy all the time, personalities are contagious.

People want to be happy, if you're coming around sad all the time, they won't want to be around you.

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THIS USER HAS BEEN BANNED FOR BREAKING RULES 2, 3, 8, AND 9

Thanks for your post. The thing is, I am completely happy and positive 95% of the time, just the other 5% I am extremely unhappy. It does not really bother me except I just can’t learn to trust girls, and when things don’t go as planned with a girl sometimes I end up blaming myself, even if it is not even my fault I look for things anyway.
I PM’d you but I’m not certain it worked, so let me know here if you didn’t get it.

@Mike: Yeah, that would probably be best however I seriously do no want to tell anyone about this stuff. I think I may go see my GP.

@Baldozon: Sorry man your post didn't really help, you've just read the title and replied to that. I already know and practice most of the things which I think are worthy of practising. It isn't a post of not making it like you thought but one of deep psychological issues. Thanks for your input regardless though.

Badolzon. That above post is by far the most ludacris thing I have heard in my life.

Anyone who isn't a sociopath has negative feelings. The fact of the matter is, its human nature. Obviously, you don't know much about women because they want a man who is willing to be vulnerable. Women want times where they can comfort and care for someone else. Your concept of value is completely skewed. The point of a so-called "alpha male" is someone who isn't afraid to stick to their feelings, whether they be positive or negative. Hence, when you allow yourself to open up to someone it builds a deeper connection with that person.

Here's some food for thought, because I know your a Mystery fan. If Mystery wasn't such a closet case with his negative emotions and actually opened up to people instead of letting it boils and explode; he'd probably have been able to keep one of those women in his life that he "loved".

If there is anyone here who believes the bullshit that was said above, I feel more than sorry for you....

This.

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Never get broken up with again: the-addiction-formula-never-get-broken- ... 88794.html

You're an idiot, please do not try to contradict me seeing as you know nothing about women.

I never said to not be vulnerable, but never be negative or angry or sad that day.

I would actually encourage telling girls about your past.

I tell girls how I used to be fat and people poked fun at me all the time.

You're not getting it, though.

Please read my post more carefully.

Never be negative NOW, be vulnerable by sharing PAST experiences.

If you tell girls that girls don't understand you and you have a hard time with them, or that you haven't had any success with girls at all, they'll perceive you as lower value - there's being "vulnerable" to you.

Child, I have obviously enraged you past the brim.

Besides, you're one of those trash talkers who talks trash about people more successful than them.

Mystery has been in FAR deeper relationships than you will ever experience.

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THIS USER HAS BEEN BANNED FOR BREAKING RULES 2, 3, 8, AND 9

badolzon is so right jsquared ur a moronnnn