Screen for neediness



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 Post subject: Screen for neediness
PostPosted: Mon Oct 12, 2009 1:22 am 
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Joined: Fri Feb 16, 2007 10:53 pm
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Website: http://thetextualhealing.tumblr.com/
Location: Australia
Girlfriend broke up with me 3 times in last month citing unhappiness and past hurtful remarks and actions. I've grovelled back pushing her for one more chance. Broke up for good 2 days ago. Got angry and told her what I thought.

Accepting that its over but am sending this final message just want people to tell me if there's any trace of neediness or how I could make it even better.

Am aware that this is one-itis don't need reminders...

"Look I am sorry for the way I acted the other night but I most certainly didn't appreciate the way you went about things. It made me feel deceived and led on especially since I thought we had something special that was above seemingly petty issues. But nevertheless I'm sorry for blowing my casket. I accept that things couldn't go on the way they were. I learnt a lot of positive and good things while being with u and they will go to ensure that my next relationship is even more fulfilling and meaningful. Am happy to stay friends as well. Im sure we'll catch up at some stage and who knows what may happen down the track hey. All the best. "

Tell me what you think

Regards


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PostPosted: Mon Oct 12, 2009 5:55 am 
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Joined: Wed Jan 28, 2009 1:23 am
Posts: 23
I would say cut it off and don't send a message and move on. I did the same thing as you and kept trying to get a reaction out of her instead of knowing when enough was enough. But, if you feel you need to message her then here is my advice.
Quote:
Look I am sorry for the way I acted the other night but I most certainly didn't appreciate the way you went about things. It made me feel deceived and led on especially since I thought we had something special that was above seemingly petty issues. But nevertheless I'm sorry for blowing my casket.
An apology should be just an apology. No need to state your case to that extent and tell her you disapprove of something she did within the apology. It doesn't sound sincere this way if you are actually attempting to be.
Quote:
I accept that things couldn't go on the way they were. I learnt a lot of positive and good things while being with u and they will go to ensure that my next relationship is even more fulfilling and meaningful.
I don't know if it is your intention, but mentioning a future relationship, even if you aren't already in one, seems like you are trying to spark jealousy. If you were trying to convey that she was not a waste of time you should just mention the relationship was a benefit to you and she helped you learn things about yourself you will hold with you.
Quote:
Am happy to stay friends as well. Im sure we'll catch up at some stage and who knows what may happen down the track hey. All the best.
You already mentioned you want to stay friends so the comment about something could be happening at a later day sounds like you are wishing you two have a chance to get back together. Which is kinda needy. If you want to be her friend then just leave it with that statement.

Best of luck man, I know it's rough and hard to recover from, but you'll pull through as long as you make a valiant effort to push on past her.


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