Suppose you're in a conversation with a girl and your friend, how do you shift the control of the conversation from your friend to you without trying to come off as a needy guy?

It bothers me to see a conversation unfold and I feel powerless just sitting there watch them converse. I find that trying to change the topic or anything comes off as being needy and wanting attention. Is that wrong?

It's funny, I was just talking to my friend about this. We were talking about this guy we know who does this, but does it the WRONG way. He's the type of person who always has to have the attention on him, and makes everyone else feel awkward and give him those kind of pity laughs and chuckles, hoping someone with more social intuition steps in.

And that's what it's basically about, social intuition. What I would suggest you do next time that happens is kind of wiggle your way in, then take control. Start of slowly, and pick the best spot to jump in. Imagine frogger lol, for lack of better comparison, the conversation is the road, your words are the frog, and their ears are the other side you are trying to get to. Best to use something relevant to you while staying on topic, that way the focus shifts to you, without you making it about just you.

You=U, G=Girl, F=your friend. Topic= some old tv show, umm rugrats
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F=haha, yea i was flipping through the channels and i saw rugrats was on, funny shit.
G=omg i used to watch that all the time, tommy used to be the best
F=yea somehow he always had the best ideas.
U=lmao yea, it's like i didnt get ideas like that until i was 16, and by then crawling just wasn't cute anymore. I remember this one time i was watching it was that episode where they went into space, they were so badass.
F=yea i don't remember that one
G=I DO! oo do you remember the episode with icecream mountain?
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Something like that.

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I do not teach men how to become pickup artists, I teach men how to take control of their lives, and yes that includes the women in them .

After reading this (frame-control-defining-reality-and-bein ... 34530.html) last night, I don't think controlling the frame is supposed to mean controlling a conversation. You're trying to make sure people are enjoying themselves, so if two people are enjoying a conversation then you're probably not failing. You may not be the one getting that specific girl's attention, but doing anything to interrupt that will make you look worse.

Maybe that's a time to go talk to someone else for a few minutes and come back later, if you can't take part in that particular conversation. (I certainly don't know jack about rugrats... )

Yea, Onoma makes a great point on something I should have added. If it's just something you can't relate to, don't force yourself into it lol, don't want the frog to get splattered.

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I do not teach men how to become pickup artists, I teach men how to take control of their lives, and yes that includes the women in them .

I appreciate the reply guys.

What would you do though if it were just 3 people in the room? Would you suggest that I just leave and let them talk it out? The girl was my guest so I didn't know whether I could just leave them be.