I'm 17, in college and there's this girl who I've liked for a few months now. She's not in my college. I'm pretty sure she's into me too or at least I know she's told her friends that she'd go out with me and she asked me out a week or 2 ago.

The problem is whenever I see her on Facebook I never initiate conversations with her. I don't write on her wall, I don't message her, I even keep my chat offline so that I don't see her name pop up! =\ Similarly I don't text or call her at all. I'm not sure why, perhaps because I don't want to f*ck up by saying something dumb or bore her? She's insecure so she won't be all like "HEYYY HOW YU DOIN!?"

I just hope I'm not pushing her away by only seeing her about once a week and not making any "cyber contact" meanwhile.

What can I do to counter these issues? =|

You want to know what you can do to counter the effects of not talking to this girl?

Sorry but I'm pretty confused as to what you want. I mean when you see each other in RL do you date/hookup/talk? Is it only online that you are lacking?


Also what kind of insecure woman asks a man out on a date?

You can't counter them, thing is, you are in love with a girl, but you can't understand why she will be in love with you. Therefor you want to not have the chance to seek her out, in order to not get rejected.

It is who you are, so you need to change yourself. Get out of your comfort-zone and start trying:)

- Exerio

Wait, what? Wouldn't a woman have to be secure to ask a guy out? Kind of the same way a guy has to be secure to pick up women?

This sounds like Approach Anxiety to me. You could text her/FB chat her, but you've got an excuse not to, i.e. you don't want to fuck it up. However, a big part of this is you learning to be a better man. To do this, you will fuck up, its how well you recover/learn from your fuck ups that matters. Also, if shes your only interest, perhaps you should go out and collect a few more numbers. This helps the confidence level tremendously, and if you fuck up, you've got more girls to call.

Look at it this way, if you don't engage her and sex her up a little bit, you'll lose her to boredom or possibly someone else who is willing to do those things. You don't want that do you?

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Crowd to Crowd

yeah its AA

just think of it this way when you want to talk to her and your kinda scared

if you do nothing you get nowhere

if you do good you get dates and things like that

if you do bad your just back in the same boat you've been in when you wasnt talking to her

regardless you lose nothing at all you can only gain from it