This is my last hope



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 Post subject: This is my last hope
PostPosted: Mon Sep 14, 2009 12:25 am 
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I'm Athend, because I'm litterally at the end...

I'm 22 years old, and practically a virgin. Only had sex once in my life, and never had a girlfriend.

I've read almost every PUA book/techniques I could get my hands on. And I've approached hundreds of women while I was in college. I kid you not, I've only gotten about a dozen phone numbers, and nothing ever went anywhere.

I feel I've wasted my money on so many audiotapes and seduction courses, because I've tried every genre of women, asked every PUA friend I have for advice, but I seem to be cursed.

I am seriously about to give up hope, because I've tried for years and never get anywhere. I've tried every psychological technique in the book, even tried some of that NLP which in my opinion is BS.

I don't know what to do anymore, I've realized I just can't compete. As much as I try to be a PUA, I have no game whatsoever. I'm short and skinny, so the only thing I have going for me is hygein and peacocking, but even that doesn't work. Not to mention I have a small penis and practically no experience in bed.

So should I keep trying? So many failures are starting to get to me, because of the sad fact that while I was in college, I could only get laid ONCE out of all the hundreds of women I approached. And this was at a freakin college. In fact, I'm greatly discouraged that there are so many PUAs out there, because like I said, with such a small dick what's the point if I have to work tooth and nail to get a girl only to have her swept away by some "playa".

I don't have oneitis or anything, I've tried getting with any girl I can, litterally even dropping my standards to an all time low. The only thing I've gotten for four years of effort, hundreds of dollars and hours of wasted time, is a handful of numbers and a shattered confidence.

Any advice or is there just something wrong with me?


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PostPosted: Mon Sep 14, 2009 12:45 am 
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Welcome to the forums.

I think your main problem is confidence. If you have no confidence in yourself, you cant expect others to respect you. Focus less on negative things that you cant control and focus on your strengths (EVERYBODY has flaws, its how well they deal with it that makes the difference). I would recommend checking the "Inner Game" section first. Once you build self confidence, half the battle is won.

Good luck.


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PostPosted: Mon Sep 14, 2009 1:05 am 
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Thanks, but it's hard to have confidence when I've tried for years and have been failing miserably. I feel like I've wasted so much time and money on "seduction" books and courses, and the fact that nothing has worked has just killed my confidence even more.

The main thing that ticks me off is that there are so many other guys that know all these seduction techniques, that I just can't compete. Because whatever I buy or read up on, some other guy has too, and believe me as far as looks go I would never be a womans first pick. Or even second.

Again, I've tried all the confidence techniques you can imagine, tried every paradigm switch mindset-changing trick that's out there but in the end, it just doesn't seem to work. I've even tried self hypnosis how whack is that!

It's a negative cycle, I know, and the more I try and get out of it, the more I fail. It's basic psychology: after enough failures, I want to quit. But I can't. I keep trying. And failing.

It's done wonders for my mental health. On top of all I spent on books and e-courses, I just don't know what to do anymore. Looking back at my college years cripples my confidence even more. I tried EVERY day to approach women, get numbers, etc, but even at parties, I was always the one going home alone.

I'm at the end of my rope here.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Sep 14, 2009 1:19 am 
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Hey man don't give up! I'm in the same position as you. Only had sex once, didn't even get to finish. lame right? I even got this girl to live with me for a week and all I got to do is finger her.
but its alright.

Have you tried demonstrating value to the women you're trying to pick up?

for example, I work in catering so I know how to do neat things with napkins. One thing in particular that I do is I ask a girl if she wants to see a magic trick.
They always do. I tell them I'm going to transform myself into a young woman, and then into an old woman.
What I do is I fold the napkin a way that when I tug at the ends they turn into boob shape and i hold it to my chest and say, young woman! aaannnd Old woman ( i sag the napkin)


one more thing... neg neg neg
there's a diagram in "The Game" of a female stick figure and some negs you could use.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Sep 14, 2009 1:30 am 
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The main problem I see for alot of guys is that they try all of these methods and techniques, but none of them seem to help. You gotta find the right one for you.

Its like what they said in high school: You can study for hours on end, but if you're studying the wrong way, you will fail every time."

You gotta try and find what fits you. I swear, if I tried all that Mystery Method stuff, I would have a mental breakdown. Yet the Method seems to do wonders for others. Its just not for me.

I've found that building your inner game and confidence can help tremendously.

If methods arent helping you, then trash em'. I, personally, see all of those "methods" for building confidence as "quick fixes". You just gotta be comfortable being you. If you have something about yourself that you dont like, change it. Never apologize for being you. Be yourself and make no compromises. If you're comfortable with yourself, everyone else will be.

You seem to have no significant approach anxiety, which is the big hurdle for 95% of the guys on here. That is a HUGE advantage. Whether you realise it or not, over half of the guys you went to college with didnt even have the balls to ask for a number.

Also, your physical attractiveness is 30% aesthetic appeal, 70% about how you carry yourself. I have cousins who (no homo) were ugly as sin, yet pulled some great looking women. Its because they carried themselves in a way that let people know they were alpha.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Sep 14, 2009 1:50 am 
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Thanks everyone for the encouragement, and yeah, I think I do need to trash a lot of the techniques I've been using, but I still feel gipped outta my money, oh well.

Yeah, I have no trouble approaching women because I'm so used to rejection, and I'm hoping to maybe learn some new techniques but for all I know the ones I've been using haven't been getting me anywhere.

I know looks aren't the biggest part of picking up a woman (so I've read) but I honestly feel my looks are holding me back, as in, I can approach women, talk with them, get them to loosen up and such, but it seems like I'm too ugly/short/whatever, and even if they like me, in the end they just don't want to stoop that low, so they just want to stay friends, to which my response is "I have enough 'friends' already".

Regardless, thanks again for the encouragment, I'll be trying to work on my inner game more, but believe me after years of trying multiple seduction techniques, and all sorts of mind-power confidence rasing techniques, I really don't have my hopes up, and considering a lot of "garunteed methods" haven't gotten me anywhere either, it's just hard to stay confident.

Still I'm trying to learn from my mistakes and trying not to give up, but honestly I feel that with so many other PUAs around, my looks, height, and inexperience are holding me back because hey, let's face it, if someone has the same skill level as me when it comes to approaching/charming women, and they're of average looks and height, I just can't compete.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Sep 14, 2009 2:09 am 
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Dude, I'm not sure you realise how many advantages you have. If you arent afraid of approaching, trying new techniques is a breeze.

Plus, you arent a virgin, which cant be said for alot of guys here.

If you are unhappy with your looks, its time to make a serious self-evaluation. You gotta ask yourself "whats working and whats not working" and go from there.

Nice to have a new member though. Good luck.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Sep 14, 2009 8:42 am 
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@ The author of this thread: Look, I'm 23 and a virgin and I'm not stressin over it so why should you? In fact, you've already fucked once therefore eliminates your v-card. Be happy you've even fucked one time -_-


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Sep 14, 2009 9:19 am 
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Welcome to the forums, sad to hear of your lack of succes. I think you should read my post even though its a bit long :P

You can try to make a thread about your looks, with some pictures of your style/looks and people can always comment on you and help you out (I'll be following your posts to help you out).

As for being skinny, I'm tall (6'3) and skinny, but it shouldnt matter THAT much if your game is right, and your confidence is most important. I know its hard to have confidence after so much failure but yesterday when I was rewatching the mystery method seminars he said something like: "I've approached thousands of sets and it took me a while before my game became more natural and automatic and only after that point, I succeeded.
You can always get a gym membership right? working out, even if you dont get HUGE you will still be more confident and you will have a new interesting hobby to talk about, pick up boxing for example, that will boost your confidence like mad and it will show. When I picked up boxing, I got so much more confident/alpha that when people WANTED to fight I'd just be like "just take off while you still can" and if it ended up with them taking a swing at me, I would destroy them. Hows that for some confidence? Knowing that you can eliminate anyone trying to hurt you?

So really, I applaud you for approaching so many women, even if you probably did it wrong. You cant take the rejections too personally, it's just a missed set, even if its a hundred.

Have faith in yourself my friend.

Chillburg


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PostPosted: Fri Sep 18, 2009 5:59 am 
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Maybe I'm breaking the rules here, but if you wanna learn how to look and dress better, search for the website "kinowear" (I'm too new to post a URL). It's an excellent place to start. It's by a guy who is familiar with the game, peacocking and all that.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sat Sep 19, 2009 6:00 am 
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Quote:
Yeah, I have no trouble approaching women because I'm so used to rejection
From the sound of this you are going into these sets expecting to be rejected, that goes back to the confidence thing, if you go in expecting to be rejected you most likely will be, if you go in with more confidence and expect to pick the girl up you will have a much better shot.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sat Sep 19, 2009 8:13 pm 
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Ya need to get to know yourself and find out what are your sticking points. You probably have some intangible problem with the way you present yourself that's not easy to see without someone analyzing it and giving you feedback.

You can try it on your own just being aware and present in what you are doing when u talk to people, but its even better if you have people who are willing to watch you interact with people and give you sincere feedback. Maybe you have limited beliefs or conflicts of interest you aren't aware of, you have awful body language, repressing or overexpressing emotions, or something else.

P.s. lotta girls have small <f>vaginas</f> too.

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 Post subject: Re: This is my last hope
PostPosted: Fri Oct 23, 2009 5:28 pm 
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Quote:
I'm Athend, because I'm litterally at the end...

I'm 22 years old, and practically a virgin. Only had sex once in my life, and never had a girlfriend.

I've read almost every PUA book/techniques I could get my hands on. And I've approached hundreds of women while I was in college. I kid you not, I've only gotten about a dozen phone numbers, and nothing ever went anywhere.

I feel I've wasted my money on so many audiotapes and seduction courses, because I've tried every genre of women, asked every PUA friend I have for advice, but I seem to be cursed.

I am seriously about to give up hope, because I've tried for years and never get anywhere. I've tried every psychological technique in the book, even tried some of that NLP which in my opinion is BS.

I don't know what to do anymore, I've realized I just can't compete. As much as I try to be a PUA, I have no game whatsoever. I'm short and skinny, so the only thing I have going for me is hygein and peacocking, but even that doesn't work. Not to mention I have a small penis and practically no experience in bed.

So should I keep trying? So many failures are starting to get to me, because of the sad fact that while I was in college, I could only get laid ONCE out of all the hundreds of women I approached. And this was at a freakin college. In fact, I'm greatly discouraged that there are so many PUAs out there, because like I said, with such a small dick what's the point if I have to work tooth and nail to get a girl only to have her swept away by some "playa".

I don't have oneitis or anything, I've tried getting with any girl I can, litterally even dropping my standards to an all time low. The only thing I've gotten for four years of effort, hundreds of dollars and hours of wasted time, is a handful of numbers and a shattered confidence.

Any advice or is there just something wrong with me?

Welcome to the world of PUA!

I hope that your endeavors see light!

_________________
THIS USER HAS BEEN BANNED FOR BREAKING RULES 2, 3, 8, AND 9


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