Hi Guys

I have this weird wall or mental block I've built up for some unknown reason. I have this mental block of putting myself out there.

I have lots of friends, but only a few close one's and I do hook-up now and again , but nothing hectic. I would say I am a bit of introvert, I'm confident ,but can't just talk to anyone or I can to guys atleast, with girls it is a bit more difficult, but usually the convo seems lame and pointless. Not sure if any of you feel the same way?

Well the thing I am struggling with is: Situation - Sitting around a table with a bunch of my mates and a couple of girls who I dont really know that well.

Well I realize I want to be the centre of attention, so I try and I can grab people’s attention, but when talking to one of the obstacles I feel my self sort of pulling away or not getting into the convo coz I dont want her to like me(or that I like her), but when I am talking to the target I also pull away or the convo drifts out coz I dont want to seem that keen. And this would be correct ,but I keep doing it not just once ,but whenever we speak unless I am absolutely sure she is keen for me.

Thats it I have a fear seeming keen coz then if it isnt recipricated I feel like a loser. I know this is totally wrong, and I need to put myself out there. Another example is if I'm talking to a girl and I don't want to hook-up with her, I just cant keep talking to her or I start acting distant. Which is wrong because it raises your social value having girls talking to you and liking you. But I cant help it. For some reason I find it hard to just talk shit with someone. It just feels fake and lame. But at the same time I want people to talk to me.

I was just wondering If you have any suggestions on how to solve this and if any of you guys experience a similar thing.

I see where you are coming from because nothing is worse than getting rejected or shot down, the only thing I could possibly think of would be to not see any conversation as pointless or fake, but as a training ground for talking to a future target, it could be a situation of using open ended questions to get her to talk and tease her and try out a new gambit etc...

I mean if you are distant with the obstacle then she could convey that to when she talks to the target, however if you have fun with her and give off a vibe of "fun" then surely it must help you in the fact that you are pre-selected for when you go to talk to the target and then isolate.

hope that helps

Hell no!

Getting rejected and shot down is fine. Abundance mentality. What is 'worse' is getting rejected or shot down and not learning from it. Don't overanalyze either. Getting shot down / rejected once is nothing to build a fonudation on. Go get rejected 10-20 times then think over what happened, what worked what didn't.