Hi!
I've been geek all my life and kind of have only 4 real friends. Very small social circle.

Recently I've been really wanting to get this PU stuff done and become more social, and I can clearly see that not having a social circle is holding me back.

I need your help guys. Should I start going out alone? (the 4 friends I have don't really like going out)
There will be a party next saturday and I want to watch 2 movies. Maybe I should go watch these movies and go to this party alone, but try to interact with people in the process?
What do you think?

If you want to develop a social circle you must decide what you want. Guys or Girls? Or maybe a group of guys to hang out and drink beer, a group of girls to go to clubs and parties and a mixed group to go out together? When you decide what your goal is you can take the apropriate actions. Find a place where you can meet people. From my experience clubs are not a great place to make new friends - it's usually loud and you can't talk much or actually connect with anyone. The best way is to find someone with the same interests. You can go to the gym, or sign up for dancing classes or get involved in some kind of social activity (you will learn new and interesting things and there are many people who will be glad to be friends with you). Since you will be in the same class or group and you're not a random stranger you can always invite them somewhere and they will probably come. After you befriend them it's easy to expand the social circle. Introduce them to new people and let them introduce you to their friends. At that point you will have a choice with who to hang out Hope this is helpful.

PS: Go to the party. Get a drink, go to some random guy who seems friendly and say "Cheers!" or "Hi! What's up?". Then go to another guy/girl and talk to him/her. Just try to talk five or six people really quick and then return and have a longer conversation with some of them. If they don't know each other - introduce them. You will be surprised how friendly people actually are

If you want to develop a social circle you must decide what you want. Guys or Girls? Or maybe a group of guys to hang out and drink beer, a group of girls to go to clubs and parties and a mixed group to go out together? When you decide what your goal is you can take the appropriate actions. Find a place where you can meet people. From my experience clubs are not a great place to make new friends - it's usually loud and you can't talk much or actually connect with anyone. The best way is to find someone with the same interests. You can go to the gym, or sign up for dancing classes or get involved in some kind of social activity (you will learn new and interesting things and there are many people who will be glad to be friends with you). Since you will be in the same class or group and you're not a random stranger you can always invite them somewhere and they will probably come. After you befriend them it's easy to expand the social circle. Introduce them to new people and let them introduce you to their friends. At that point you will have a choice with who to hang out Hope this is helpful.

PS: Go to the party. Get a drink, go to some random guy who seems friendly and say "Cheers!" or "Hi! What's up?". Then go to another guy/girl and talk to him/her. Just try to talk five or six people really quick and then return and have a longer conversation with some of them. If they don't know each other - introduce them. You will be surprised how friendly people actually are

well really it depends where this party is and all this stuff is because if u have the party at the club and stuff it will defly be hard to open a social circle but if u really wanted to make a big ccircle or something, try to talk to people at the movie theatre or wherever you r watching a movie man

Yes, the party is at the club.

Thanks for the replies guys! Keep them coming!

There are some people that I know but I'm not actually friend of them, who will be there, so maybe I should call them so we go together? Then maybe I can meet more people...

If you will feel more comfortable - sure. Call them and go together. If you go there as a part of their group people will react better to you. Just don't stay and talk only with them all night - the fact that you went there with them should not stop you from talking to other people. And the good thing is that if you go and talk to some girls you can tell them "Let me introduce you to my friends.". This way the girls will like you because you are social and are introducing them to new people. The guys will like you because you are bringing girls. And also if you choose one girl and talk to her her friends won't interrupt you so much because they will be occupied. And by the way I almost forgot. The most important thing is: HAVE FUN!

Exact same situation as you. Samethread building-a-social-life-from-scratch-vt4 ... highlight= Except I was antisocial/loner instead of geek, and have lots of scattered friends who I never hardly see.

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dont feel bad, the majority of my best friends live in different cities. im a good friend to them all and we keep in touch, but for some reason even though i now live in one of the biggest cities in the world, none of them are here.

like some mentioned, here are ways i made new friends - at the gym, playing sports, at a bar, through mutual friends (IMPORTANT), work, random activities.

ive never been one to meet a complete stranger and expect them to become a super close friend of mine.

-but here are some things to know - starting from zero, it takes a little time.

-the more proactive you are, the quicker / easier time you will have.

-nobody ever made friends sitting alone by themselves. get out there.

-find common ground with ppl. if u are a huge sports fanatic, go to sports bars / games / events for example. if u like acting, go to acting classes....

-mentality matters. if you are talking to someone who has an entire family / network of friends / everyone he has ever known all living in his area, then you are probably going to have to initiate a lot to get a friendship solidified. i.e. ask them to hang out , to go to this event with u, etc.

-and, like i said before, always use MUTUAL friends. whether it be by going with them to a party, or just them inviting one of their friends along... ive made great friends this way.

i feel for u, and ive been there before, it definitely sucks. ive been on both ends of the spectrum. just be persistent, keep your head up, and know that ppl want to meet new interesting people. try to become a person that anyone would be excited to introduce to their own friends.

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swag