Hey i know this chick right that lives like two doors next to me. We talk and txt and see each other at the pool right. I really like her and we hit it off good. its just that the sticking point is when i ask her out on a date she says idk and does the hehes and hahas. remember now this is all txting lol but when i asked her the first time she said yeah sure. now shes changing her mind. Is she messing with my head or does she even really want to date me? And how can i fix it it where she does?

Sounds like you have a flaker, put her on the back burner if she does it. Reward her with a date request for a her positive input. Don't keep asking if thats her haha response. She will get the hint, if she confronts you on not talking to her as much. Strait up tell her that your busy and she didn't seem totally interested.

I respectfully disagree with dri with "putting this one in the back burner when she goes ha ha" . . . She goes "ha ha" because she's just a nervous little kid. You never give up that much power to a girl . . . especially ones who go "ha ha" out of nervousness.

Anyhow, you don't ask a little kid to go out on a date like you wouldn't ask your little brother if it's OK for you to take him out to the ice cream shop for a cone. What you're doing for your little brother is a TREAT for him. What you're doing for this nervous little girl is the same. So you don't get elaborate and "ask" for a date and you definitely don't do this over the phone.

In your mind, just pretend you're chatting with your little brother and you're doing a little favor for him like taking him to the pet store or to the video game arcade. So when you see her . . .

YOU: Hey, what are you up to?
Her: Nothing . . .

You: I'm walking to the ice cream shop. Come on, let's go for a walk.
Her: Ehm . . . I don't know.

You: What are you doing instead, figuring out a cure for cancer? Come on . . . (You motion, with your hand and head)
Her: (She'll follow you around like a little puppy)

This is the way you run the show with nervous little kids. You make the decisions for them because they can't make any decisions for themselves.

its cool bro kasabi its how we learn. And I agree with you in the delivery aspect and you have brought up a very good point in the 'date' scenario. Your right asking for a date from someone like this is much different than someone that knows what they want. I find this true with a lot of women (more common in the young ones actually now that I think about it). I don't know if its a shyness deal or what but yes tell her what your going to do. Don't ask. But still if she keeps hehe hahaing. Backing off is a reality check for her to question why and start vying for your attention again, in which you would reluctantly resume the we are going out to do this setup. Or if she is messing with you, she will give up. You took her fun away. Thanks for the input kasabi I always find text game so tricky. Lack of that emotion that conversing gives you.

Just a few more thoughts:

1. No reason to be constantly texting a girl who lives within a 10 second walk from your place.

2. "Ignoring" is a chick's passive aggressive move. Not sure why any guy would ever do this. Pulling is an active routine and so is "pushing". Simply being quiet and ignoring your target makes you look like some depressed little girl suffering through her heavy menstruation cycle. Instead, you call her the next day or see her the next day and show up with a big smile and remind her of the fun she missed (In a "I'm sorry you were too busy" tone.) Then you bombard her with other great adventures that you share with non-scarety cats: This is what you'd be doing whether she joined or she didn't join.

The point is, no little girl going "ha ha" should alter your life even one bit.

"The point is, no little girl going "ha ha" should alter your life even one bit."

Thats it right there.

Thanks guys i appreciate it. I must admit my self asteem is like a South Beach 10.5.. i have the biggest ego u will ever see but if someone does not get sucked into my frame and fall for my tricks i get really pissed off and type furiously... my self asteem can drop like a hat and i go into manic-depression mode... i know its wierd but i guess thats the repercussions for maintaining such a big ego.. even little girls can trip me up lol

MAXXIM

Stop lying to yourself. You can type up whatever the hell you want in a public forum but at least admit and accept yourself for who you are. You've got the self esteem the size of an 8 year old who just shit in his pants in class.

Anybody who lets a little kid rile him up has a self esteem lower than the little kid. All you're doing with your over-the-top "frame work" is covering up your low self esteem and when it doesn't work, you're exposing yourself . . . to yourself. (Nobody else gives a fuck)

You put yourself in a never ending cycle. You go over the top with your "tricks" and when it doesn't work, you get pissed off and then later on, go with your "tricks" again. Girls may be indecisive but they're very perceptive and can smell a fake from a mile away. So how about trying this instead?

Think of all the confident, high self esteemed people you know or heard of . . . I mean the real, cool under pressure winners in life. Military leaders, CEO's of major companies, sports heroes, etc . . . These guys actually SLOW down when the going gets tough. They actually sower their speech, react less to the buzzing of the crowd or criticisms, and take more time to respond to hostility. Begin with the breathing . . . breathe slower . . . walk slower. . . communicate slower. . . and when somebody communicates to you, breathe . . . think . . . then reply slowly. Begin by changing your visible actions which is 100% within your control . . . When this begins to work for you, you self esteem . . . your real self esteem . . . will follow suit.

wow yes i have tried that after reading the John Alexander books. but im naturally very hyper i have adhd and all that shit. i have tried medications to optimize my alpha male body language but all it gave me in return was a zombie like state and the need to not sarge. And if i try my game mentality is truly pathetic.. soo.. but when i sarge my hyper-activity is really an advantage. my adrenaline and testosterone surges and i wont even need game. im a natural at cocky-funny and can utilize that effectively with my big ego.. but like i said can be destroyed if i meet the right person... i need a default game plan

MAXXIM