Hey, first off, I’m not from the States, so English is not my native language. Hope you guys can help me out.

Here's the problem. I know this girl for a few months now. Everything was great until last Friday. At first we were flirting and I was doing the things that work. So the tension builds and we started text-messaging and IM.

So last week we had a really great evening and we kissed late that night. Nice, you would think. Well I thought so too. I did everything by the book and it worked again! But the day after (on Friday) we have like this great town-party with music and stuff everywhere.

That day we begin text-messaging and it was cool, not to fast, just slow. We met around 9 in the evening. But here's the problem, I was not in the mood. Was not talking, not busting here balls, no nags, nothing. I was really down and not feeling very well. So it wasn't working that well.

Later that night (and a few beers later) we went to the yacht. I live in a city with lots of water, everybody owns one So we sit and talked with a few other people. At one point everybody left. She said: I'm going to bed to. So I was al little drunk and not liking that, so I kissed her. Not a bad move because she kissed back. So everybody is gone and we talk, have a few drinks and kiss some more. But at one point she said it again (and not to take me with her, that’s 100% sure) But I was stupid and did not left. What a wussy move.

Finally I left when the sun was already shining and did not had a great feeling of the night. Next day text-messaging was very slow and then it came. The stupidest thing I could do. I made a text-message a follow: I really like you and hope we can do something together soon. Sorry about tonight, it was the liquor I should have left when you told me to. So after 3 hours I get one back: Hey, don’t bother, that's fine. But we have to look sometime...kiss (we have to look sometime??? Why not, yeah that’s a great idea).

That's cold, and I know, it’s my fault! I know what I did wrong. I should have left and never showed here some feeling so soon after kissing. After her reply I did not send her anything. So what should I do? Is she going to send me? Any tips? It's not like this is the only girl around, but I want to see if I can turn this thing around. And she is really cute

I would not contact her for at least a week. She needs time to miss you. Guys often make the mistake of saturing a girl with their presence, bad move. Attraction builds when you are NOT around (and this includes phone calls, text messages, etc.).

It sounds like you identified the mistakes that were made, so I am not going to go there.

One more thing, stop with all the text messages.

_________________
Keep people off-balance and in the dark by never revealing the purpose behind your actions. - Robert Greene

Hey thanks!

A few questions....

I have some conflicting believes. On the one hand I think, leave her alone and she will come to you. But on the other I am thinking: Mayby she thinks I'm a player and she feels used, because it is kind of rude right? Kiss her, and then no contact.

She felt atraction for me, but I have the feeling I really screwed up. I know attraction isn't a choice, but can you really fix a situation like this? She could be happy that I am not contacting her, right?

Let her think you are a player. You are better off being thought of as a player than a nice, spineless wussy boy...right?

Players are exciting, challenging and an accomplishment if she thinks you left the arms of countless women to be with her.

If her IL is high, she will start wondering what you are doing, who you are with and why you have not contacted her. This is when her insecurities start to kick in. Trust me; you WANT these thoughts bouncing around her head. A woman’s insecurities are her biggest weakness; use them to your advantage.

Stop thinking about it so much though, keep yourself busy so you don't call or text her.

_________________
Keep people off-balance and in the dark by never revealing the purpose behind your actions. - Robert Greene

Sounds logic to me

Enough things to do in my life, so thinking of other stuff is not a problem.

One thing, I know a lot of terms, but IL? Don't know what that means...

IL stands for Interest Level. It is directly associated with how much attraction she feels towards you.

_________________
Keep people off-balance and in the dark by never revealing the purpose behind your actions. - Robert Greene

So, time for a little update I think...

Yesterday I did it. I texted her. Yeah I know, close to a week though. Get a respond in 10 minutes. So I waited half an hour and replied. Then she hits back in 3 minutes. What I did then was stupid, I hit her back to early, let’s say 5 minutes. Then the silence came...after an hour, I get a response from her. It was a nice message; she tells me she's going to sleep now, wishes me good luck with my exam tomorrow, wishes me good night and ends off with a 'Kiss!' That's a kiss with explanation mark (Think that's good because I had lost those endings, if you know what I mean).

So I think that's great right? Should have just let it be for now, but of course wussbag is coming in and I replied her after an hour. Nothing special, it was a funny comment about something and I ended with a; good night.

So I am thinking. She has two reasons to text me today. She can comment on what I said to her in the last message or she can ask me how my exams go. Well, if she doesn’t? What will that mean? Is she just taking it slow? Or she is being polite...

Off topic:

Really want to thank you guys and this forum, wish I had came here earlier. I am into this for over a year now and had many great results. But I missed a place where there are people doing the same kind of thing. Well this forum is the place to be. It is great having a place where you can meet guys that understand what you are doing.

On topic:

She isn't the kind of woman that kisses everybody; I know that for a fact. So that she did that with me is a good thing. I did some thinking last night, and the moment it all went wrong is the moment I became the nice guy. I dropped my game and became too attached on the outcome. I have to get back to the things that worked with her, although I don't know if you can ones she has seen the wussbag.
I rolled into the game after a relationship that lasted 6 years. Now, more than a year later she is the first woman I thought of as 'great relation material'. The rest was just a lot of fun. So, I do not want the oneitis on her, but I do want to see if I can spark the attraction again.

One last thing, I am 27, she is 21. She said; my father is going to kill you when I come home with you. You guys think that this plays in her head? Not the killing part of course but the age-difference?

Yesterday I did it. I texted her. Yeah I know, close to a week though. Rolling Eyes Get a respond in 10 minutes. So I waited half an hour and replied. Then she hits back in 3 minutes. What I did then was stupid, I hit her back to early, let’s say 5 minutes. Then the silence came...after an hour, I get a response from her. It was a nice message; she tells me she's going to sleep now, wishes me good luck with my exam tomorrow, wishes me good night and ends off with a 'Kiss!' That's a kiss with explanation mark Wink (Think that's good because I had lost those endings, if you know what I mean).

Congratulations, you are now in AFC, Wussy Land. Let me ask you this, how would you feel if a girl (who you did not find all that attractive) was timing YOUR text messages? Kind of creepy right?

This post has looser boy with no life written all over it. My apologies if this is coming across a bit harsh, but after a year of vising this site, you should know better bro.

_________________
Keep people off-balance and in the dark by never revealing the purpose behind your actions. - Robert Greene

Well, on the 'back in wussy land part' you are probably right! On the looser with no life part I am not going to comment. But no hard feelings.

The thing is; I am analyzing why these things occur and what you can do to turn them around in your advantage. That is why I post this; to give you guys some idea of the situation.

I realize that I did some stupid things. But that it because I like this girl. In the last year my game was good. With room for a lot of improvement of course. But I was doing great. But now I have this situation and (you are right) I am falling back in AFC-land.

I am sure there are many guys who have had the same problem. Liking a girl and then make all sort of stupid mistakes. Instead of continuing doing the things that work.

I am reading about this stuff for a year now, found this site last week, but that is not so important.

But let me ask you something else then. What do you do when you like someone and at that moment you fall back and become AFC again? How do you handle that kind of situation?

For me it is time to get out of wussyland again, so I am going to get my shit together!