Hi guys,

I met this cutesy Korean girl at my school. In fact, she knows me quite well cos her professor in class always mention about me (I was his top student before, and pretty close to him). Plus a few of her friends are now in my class and so the friendship circle of mine and her are pretty much overlapping.

She stays not very far from my house either. I wasn't much friendly with her at first, when my friends introduced her to me. Just an acquaintance. Then a few weeks go back, during semester end exam week, I met her at the bus stop near my house. We were taking same bus since we are going to same university. On bus, we talked for awhile (no routines or no techniques. I am totally new...) and exchanged phone numbers.

Since then we were texting each other, not very frequently, only occasionally.

Last week I texted her to meet up this week (today, Monday) as I wanted to show her a very nice spot in Singapore. She agreed, and confirmed back the day and time, also where we would meet (the bus stop we met before).

Then today, during lunch time (which was a few mins ago), she texted me that she cannot meet up with me today, and said "i m so sorry" for twice.

Here is what I am thinking to do:

What I am thinking right now to do is to ignore her for today, not replying her sms. Then tomorrow, when I see her at school (her class and mine have different schedules, hers 2 hours earlier than mine) I will simply ask "what's up" and why she cancelled today. And shrug off like it's not important and I don't care.

Or... probably I will just go in her class during break-time (as I frequent to classes of that same professor) and talk to her about that. But I think second idea is pretty lame and will look like I m desperate to meet her.

But what I am not clear is what to do next. Whether my idea above is correct way to do or not, I am uncertain of what's next. If I carry out my first idea, then how shall I setup for a date next time? Actually, more of minidate, like walking in the park or showing her some not-well-known but beautiful spots in Singapore (She's been here for two years but don't know some places I mentioned. I am not a local here either. Both of us are foreign expatriate students, from other Asian countries.). Or maybe taking her to a magic show.

Any ideas, my brothers?

Don't text her. Wait until you see her in person.

You should say hello to her, but do not bring up the fact that she flaked on you.

By bringing it up you will show her that it affected you, and you have been thinking about it. That's a DLV

Remember, you are the prize, and she should want you. After you say hi to her, she will probably apologize to you about flaking. She will also probably offer a reason why she had to flake.

If you follow up her apology with something like "well, maybe we can hang out later this week", you are agian going into the DLV zone. You can't let her get away with flaking so easily (even though you want to hang out with her).

I think the best thing to do is after you hear her apology and excuse just shrug and say "no big deal - hey, you have my number right?"

This will put the idea in her head that she has to call you. She has to chase you again. You are the prize.

You gotta be cool about it - it's no big deal.

After you ask her if she has your number you may change the subject entirely - talk about class or whatever, or you can leave it at that and hope she calls.

Good Luck!!!

Thank you for answering, eskwire.
A question I have, what if she will not mention about it at all? Or mention about it but not apologizing? Just a probability.
Will saying "you have my number, right?" actually put that idea into her head? Since she is Korean and though her English proficiency is not so bad, still English is not her native language. Will she get the subtle communication behind that question?

She will not call. That's what I know from my instinct. So shall I be proactive and call her? Or simply call her out for an activity (probably a show or magic show or something) along with a few other friends (mine whom she also know) in next few weeks time?

What further steps should I take?

Thank you again, eskwire, for answering my questions

I dunno - Korean girls that don't speak much english are not my specialty.

Asian girls tend to be much more shy, compared to American girls (my specialty!).

If you know she won't call then my advice will not work. You need a new plan.

Besides being the prize, the next facet of PUA is that you do things different from the expected norms, but still within social boundaries. (ask her out to see a horror movie???)

Sorry I can't help you more - but it sounds like you have a good idea to what the score is.

Let me know how this turns out!

Hi eskwire,

Thanks again for your advice.

It seems like I was weak in my initial and middle game when I met her. Probably I should start from the square one at school and build attraction & rapport with her again. Then make a new date later.

But the problem is her class schedule is different from mine and she's only taking one module this semester. It turns out that she only has to come two days a week to school. It's pretty much difficult to catch her.

It's not that she doesn't speak much English. She has to speak in English since there are very few Koreans in school environment. My concern is only that she might not understand the subtle message behind what you advised me to say.

So, eskwire, while Asian girls are shyer than Western girls, what alternatives would you suggest me if you forget that she's an Asian girl?

I am planning to take her out again for an interesting activity, but now not just with me but also a few friends (close to me who also know her, or probably one of her friends). Then build attraction and rapport with her (might have to isolate her though) and later on go for another date.

Seems like techniques for shy Asian girls have to be more subtle and ahh somewhat different!

Sam

Ooops... the professor informed me last day that he caught her hugging and making small kisses with another guy from class at a corridor.

Seems like boyfriend is in the picture. Perhaps this is why she flaked me ...