Short answer is yes you can...

Better answer is, though you can alter your processes and could remove your anxiety it can be useful to you if you simply alter your perception of it.

I want you to think of 2 emotions... anxiety first, what are your symptoms? increased breathing, heart rate, shaking hands, sweating etc... Now I want you to think of excitement or anticipation... what are your symptoms? increased breathing, heart rate, shaking hands, sweating etc... Hmmmm would you rather have anxiety? Or excitement? Same emotion... different emotional anchor... Be excited

Sadly at this point I think its very unlikely that you will be able to get this girl. Generally speaking you have a window of opportunity with a woman that you need to escalate within... too soon and your pushy and creepy... to late and your just a friend and hence also creepy.

It is time to Develop 'game' my friend... ask questions around this forum... read some books on the subject and start talking to women more. GL

So This involves girl I met on valentine's day that I ran some good kino-based game with, got her number, ended up making out with her a lot she was all over me. Going back to her place, she was drunk, I was drunk, didn't want to fuck her in that state. We ended up continuing to make out and passing out in her bed all cuddled up.

I felt like we built a fair amount of comfort too. Also, I told her I would take her skating (I'm really good at it, she said she wanted to skate when she was younger and took a few lessons...) and that was like my "reason" to get her number, pulled it off smoothly.

Today (2 days after the hook up, one day post waking up in her bed) I texted her. I used the material from the forum
me: "Stop!"
her: stop what?
me: Stop thinking about me and smiling.... like you're doing... now.
her: "who is this"
me: It's SigFlo (*used my real name ), dork! how was the hangover on sunday
her: Not horrible after lots of motrin.

So here's my issue:
I'm super busy this week. I like this girl, want a day 2, but I'm legitimately really busy until Friday. How should I proceed? Should I text like once a day like mehow text game stuff then call on like thursday when I'm not busy?? I'm not sure when to call, how to go about this, if we should do the skating thing or what.

_________________
SigFlo- Recovering AFC

I'd try the honest route... till her that your super busy this week so what works better Friday or Saturday?

Or Friday and sunday or whatever... I like to use the 1 or 2 type for these situations because you are excluding the option of no... if you say blah blah blah lets hang out friday... or I'm going here you should come... if she is legitimately busy your kinda hosed... so with the either or your still assuming that she will be seeing you... but giving her an option incase she is busy on one of the dates/times. It's very rare to get a no for this in my experience because they have to pull that one out of the air... it's implied that she must say yes.

Hey, what do u think about this freezer / neg sms.

I told her today that I have something to tell her tomorrow (via sms). And told her to remind me.
SMS looked like this (free translation): "I got one thing for ya tomorrow. Remind"

She asked "What thing?", I ignored that.

Later she asked "Heey : D What you got? Curiosity woke."

I told her "Your clothes are too tight for u and you use too much make-up. Gotta handle one important thing ->"

The real thing Im telling her about tomorrow is not important. So what you think, was that too stiff or bad??

EDIT: Answered almost right away "Aha that was a nice thing "

Im reading about C&F, and thought using it on her sometime. But is this freezing/neg. thing good?

And one more thing. Is C&F from your nature or can you learn it like you can use it improving; no need for ready sentences?

hey doctor,

please check out my thread. i'd like to hear you views.

complicated-situation-vt40248.html

For the most part, I've gotten over approach anxiety. Very often I see girls eyeing me strongly and this almost always yields a confident approach and a positive result. In 90% of the cases not only do I feel fine approaching, but feel like I do so successfully - I can segue smoothly into conversation, they seem interested, etc.

From that point I'm totally comfortable negging, DHVing, blah blah blah. Girls are laughing, IOIing, complimenting NON-STOP. Everything seems perfect and right about the interaction.

In fact, I don't even have any problem number closing. I'm getting about 1 out of every 2 times I talk to a girl a don't know (many times I don't even intend to "sarge" them). They give the number willingly and often with an overt sense of enthusiasm. Here's the problem:

I simply can not get a 2nd day. It is only AFTER the number close a few days later that a girl says she has a boyfriend or makes up a transparent excuse not to hang out. Just this week alone I have number closed 4 girls, all of whom have either rejected my offer for a 2nd meeting or have agreed, but stood me up (painful!). It's gotten to the point where halfway through the conversation I'm already deciding the whole thing is pointless, as if I can sense their interest deteriorating.

I'm not sure exactly what the problem is but I have a hunch: I open very strongly, but about 4 minutes into the conversation the excitement and rhythm seem to run out (for both of us). I feel that I am depending on an incredible opening 3 quarters to compensate for a depressingly lacking final quarter - that the girl is giving her number to the exciting and refreshing new man she met in the beginning as opposed to the random unimpressive guy on the street who he is quickly turning out to be. A final note is that most of the opportunities I have to meet girls are on the bus or at the bus-stop going to and from class (college). This usually only allows about 6-7 minutes, many times less.

I try my best to self-assess and learn through trial and error, but this seems to be a trend I can't (easily) beat on my own and is absolutely positively gorilla-raping my confidence.

Any help would be greatly appreciated.

(the doctor, hope you dont mind me butting in here)
Hampster, please dont post the exact same question in more than one thread. If you want a second opinion on an answer given then feel free to ask another person if the advice you were given was good. However, if you just ask your question in all the "ask" threads it wastes lots of peoples time. The people on this forum who are helping with things like the "ask" threads of giving out their experience want to give the best quality answers possible and that takes us time... If each of us answered every question our whole lives would be on this forum.

oh sorry bout that

hey doc. i have some questions for you. thanks in advance for your answers.

1) i am thinking about gaming alone sometimes. how should i enter and progress through the bar/club? go to the straight to the bar or edge of dance floor and look for targets? or engage a small set right away? i dont want to look like a tool just standing around.

2) is it better to open cold or wait for ioi's? do i still need an opener if i have strong ioi's or can i just introduce myself and begin to personalize?

3) i have 2 fb6-7 bisexual friends (they dont know each other) that i go out clubbing with seperately. i usually just dance w/them (which they love to do) and haven't been effective at picking up new hb's. how can i use my bi-fb's as props on set more efficiently? i was thinking about maybe opening sets w/opinions on things like "she wants to cut her hair short. what do you think?" i need to get the bi-fb's more involved. they both will be down for it and maybe i can f-close w/them and a higher hb. i really want higher hb's!

4) i have seen the mall exercise. do you have any others to help w/AA.

Hi Doc!

Thank you in advance for taking time in reading through and hopefully answering this question

During the last few days I have met two interresting girls that I am most likely to see again.

Girl 1:
This girl has been in my class at college for a few years time now, but we actually said hello to eachother for the first time last weekend. We have very few friends in common, making it difficult to beeing introduced to eachother. The first "conversation" (if one may call it a conversation) took place at closing time of a night club, and the exact words are mentioned below:

Me: You're the class of 20XX, right?
Her: That's right, I've seen you arround in class.
Me: My name is DXO.
Her: I'm ..., nice to meet you.
Me: Nice meeting you too. I'm in a hurry right now, but I hope we'll talk more soon.
Her: See ya.

At this point I really was in a hurry, as one of my friends was in trouble and I had to help him get out of that trouble, but that's something I didn't tell her.

However, the chances are that I'll meet this girl again soon, and I am therefore wondering whether you think I still stand a chance with her or whether my actions at that point excluded me from her? That is what should I do next time we get the chance to talk?

Girl 2
This girl I met in the gym by the end of my workout. I noticed that she was looking towards me on as I entered the room. Then I needed some equipment she wasn't using which I asked for, and she handed them over looking at me and smiling.
Then during the next few minutes I noticed her looking towards me several times, and our eyes met on two or three occasions. Distance here was at about 2 yards. Later she moved to another part of the gym, but she still occasionally looked at me.
Then as I was leaving the room, I had to go past her. At this point our eyes met once again, but this time she was blushing and smiled genuinly as I was passing. I also had a genuine smile at this point.

Chances are that I will meet this girl again since this is the only gym in a large area. If I see her again, how should I start a conversation and how should I act?

About me:
I tend to be generally a confident guy, but I have some weaknesses that I need to get rid of. My biggest weakness, as you probably understand from description of girl 2, is that I have problems with openers especially with beautiful girls. However, once a conversation is started I turn back into who I really am and all of my fears disappear, and I usually end up with a phone numer, date etc, once passing my weakness of opening.

This was a long post, but hopefully you will be able to give me some advice on these two matters. Thank you in advance

hey doc im a newbie to this site...just signed up because i've been out of the "game" for bout 2 years now ..and i just want to get back into to it start having more women come into my life..my question is : how do i embrace being " In the moment " this is a major problem for me because everytime i notice a broad im attracted to my mind just goes blank and i start "fantasizing" about me and her instead of actualizing the situation ..help me out

Hi Doc , can u give me some advises to make my frame control solid. If u write the main things that i must follow or give me some links to some reading stuffs i will be very appreciate to you . I will buy you a case of beer

Hey Doc can you spare some time for newbie before i friggin kill myself over my situation?

theres this girl ive liked for a while, with her its like shes on and off at one point she liked me. to her i went from lover to friend.
i wanna go from GOOD FRIEND to BOYFRIEND
if u guys can help me out with some good negs, peacock items, routines, bf destroyers, number closers it would be much apreciated
i have tons of confidence and im good with openers just thought id mention tht


ur assistance would be much apreciated

Hey guys, I'm currently on vacation with my girlfriend... I'm posting this here for you all so that you dont think I'm ignoring your questions... I'm just a little busy at the moment

Dont worry though I will be back around and answering question this weekend