Shy, Misanthrope or Confused? someone psychoanalyse me.



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PostPosted: Thu Jan 22, 2009 3:19 am 
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Ok, I've been meaning to go out and do approaches but somehow I keep lacking the motivation to. I know logically that doing A-B means you get to C which is the lay or the relationship. But nowadays I'm not really even sure I want C.

I used to be really shy and afraid of people, along the way I guess it somehow developed into misanthropy instead. I see the Game as a way to get laid instead of having a relationship, and since one night stands are something an AFC doesn't have a chance of pulling off, I'm going nowhere.

So now I am really confused, am I still shy, afraid of relationships? or do I just view girls as targets (common idea in the community that there is no such thing as love). Because you can't go straight to sex without actually liking the person right? or pretending to be interested? Am I just having cognitive dissonance, bluffing myself that I don't care?


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PostPosted: Thu Jan 22, 2009 4:24 am 
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You won't be able to get any girl, one night stand or wife, if you can't create attraction between you. 90% of game is creating that initial spark that will make her interested in you as more than a friend. Furthermore, if you think that you don't really want to be social and at some point in the future you will go out and magically snag the woman of your dreams, you would probably be wrong. Developing basic social skills and emotional intelligence are not only key components in your self development, but scientifically prove to give people the most pleasure in their lives. The game is about becoming the person that naturally attracts women. Becoming the person that conveys strength, leadership, confidence, safety, and emotional understanding.

The techniques that come with 'the game' are just tools in your belt to be used at any point during an interaction, to reach a desired point. These are just things that some people have found to work for them in the past. The true essence of 'the game' is self development and actualization, not getting laid. Take what you want from this, but if you want to have a full, enriched life... If you want the woman of your dreams, and not settle for lower... Then you are going to have to pay attention to your social awareness and emotional acuity.
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Am I just having cognitive dissonance, bluffing myself that I don't care?
This is quite probable. Your mind's greatest compulsion is to do what you've always done. Your subconscious is sabotaging your efforts to change and resisting new experiences because it wants to protect you. If you persist, then this wiring will change and adapt to your new lifestyle and in fact insist subconsciously that you continue in your direction.

Good luck.

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PostPosted: Thu Jan 22, 2009 4:43 am 
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Plethora i would say hit the nail on the head i have this problem to where i would start then just drift out slowly but hopefully we can both come out on the strong end


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PostPosted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 11:02 am 
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Thanks, that was informational.

I used to be able to have crushes, like crush on a girl for a few weeks, then switch to someone else. And when I do have crushes, 7/10 times I do go and approach the girl in my AFC way and crash out. But the frequency has been lowered, now I don't crush on random girls for long months. Now I just see, HBs or UGs not women as real people. How do I get back the 'mojo' or whatever.


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PostPosted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 11:13 am 
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I like to think of the game as a systematic way to eliminate glaring flaws in yourself. I find its perfect for me, because I was born with borderline Autism which impairs social functioning, I really needed to slowly desensitise myself from social surroundings which really started in my mid teens through basketball but now thanks to jobs and forcing myself bit by bit to go out i now am as sociable as anyone and the life of the party alot of the time. what im saying to hey hey is that it is so worth it just to take the plunge and really the risks are so ridiculously small that its stupid not to.


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PostPosted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 12:08 pm 
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I have Asperger's Syndrome. If it gives any edges in this, it's obsession. I've become fixated wholly on improving myself, and refining my game with women. Other than that, it's a huge set-back. I've come pretty far, but still have far to go.

Stick in there. Force yourself out of your home, force yourself into awkward situations whenever you can, and that will make you better equipped.


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 16, 2009 12:34 pm 
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Hi Guys, thanks for the advice.

I guess I don't hate people as much as I thought I did, I'm working on slowly changing my frame of mind. As in when I see the girl I think "I am interested in knowing more about you" than "I want you to blow me, now!"

One step at a time.


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