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 Post subject: Advice here !
PostPosted: Tue Feb 03, 2009 10:08 pm 
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Hello All,

Just posting to have your opinion on this ' on it way' pick-up ( well I hope).
I approached this HB9s in the bus going to work and I #closed. I waited the day after to set up a date on friday, but she didn't answered my first call and on the second I left a message. I got no answers, but I decided to be a bit persistent, and called her again on friday once I came back from work. Again, she didn't hang-up and I decided to send a text, which was also left unanswered.

At this point, I'm convinced she's not into me, and go back to my own business. On saturday, I was doing some work on my computer in a coffee-shop, and around 2pm, I got a text from her saying that she will be free to hang out on the evening. I wait 3 hours, and try to call her back, but no fucking answer. I leave a text setting up the meeting and saying that I hope to see her there. At this point, I'm 100% sure she won't show up. But she does.

She's really hot, we kissed each other on the cheeks, and the evening starts. I do a lot of Kino, and she's very receptive, she smiles a lot, does a lot of eye contact to which i answer etc... After a pub gig, I proposed a last drink to her, but she said she'd rather go back home. Because she lives at the corner of my street, I decide to go back with her, and at the front of her home, she hugs me. I kiss her in the cheeks and try to go for a *close, but she slightly tilts her head to hold it on my shoulder. Then I ask when we should meet again, and she says:" tomorrow". I say, ok, I'll contact you tomorrow.

The next day, I text to ask her to go for a walk with me. She says that it is nice but that she doesn't really want to go out today. I'm a bit disappointed, but decide not to insist, and leave a ' next time, see you soon'. That was last sunday.

To sum up, the girl is giving me contradictory signs. In my opinion, I should just wait for her to call me back, because she knows that I'm interested, now it's her turn to show me that my interest is reciprocated. So my strategy is to do nothing more than expect her to call back. Still, I'm not sure if the move 'do not insist' on the sunday was the right thing to do. Maybe I should have come to her place and convince her or something like that. What do you think?


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PostPosted: Tue Feb 03, 2009 11:26 pm 
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I think she's better at this than we are. LOL. She's working us like a HB9 does. She is in control of the tempo for things. She knows this because of your persistence in contacting her. Not saying it was the wrong thing to do, but she gained control this way.

The only way to really get it back is to do a freeze out like you were thinking to have her contact you back, and then you control the situation. Or we can play her game and hope for the best, but... she probably will loose attraction for us.

Good luck with her

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PostPosted: Tue Feb 03, 2009 11:49 pm 
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JSmooth is right that you should freeze her out, and that she's playing it like any other guy, but there's one thing I'd add.

Stop agreeing to her schedule.

Doesn't it seem unfair that you have to call her and text her MULTIPLE times before you can set up a date and then she texts you ONCE and you have a date?

That's utterly unfair to you, let her know it and don't accept it. That's what sets a PUA apart from regular boys, they don't accept shit like that, then they communicate that it's unacceptable.

So let her know, probably via Text message since she won't answer your calls, and see what she does.

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PostPosted: Wed Feb 04, 2009 12:15 am 
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Yeah, I'm quite convinced that now the best thing to do is to wait for her to show her interest, I've done enough actions towards her.
But still, if I could travel back in time, I think I would have preferred doing the following: go to her place, ring the door, ask for her, point out the beautiful weather, the pointlessness of staying home, give her 10 minutes to get ready. I think in doing so, you:

1. Show strong personality
2. You don't wait for her approval, you impose your gut view of how obvious the 'yes, I'll go for a walk with you' option is for her. In brief, you are the pilot.

The possible drawbacks: she might have a good reason to stay at home ( girl sickness, work to do) and think that you don't take her words seriously, that you disrespect her at some point. Still, in this case, the girl show you that she is not easily pulled out from daily routine even by some sort of adventurous behavior, and drops her value as well. It tells you that it might not be worth pursuing her.

So you win on both sides. The trick works only of the girl lives near you so that showing up at her place demands no efforts ( you were just passing by, as you usually do).


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PostPosted: Wed Feb 04, 2009 12:29 am 
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Answer to cinnamon spice:
I already asked her about the unanswered phone calls. She had an excuse for saturday, she was at the cinema, and turned it off. She also said that she was out of credit to receive phone calls in general and preferred to send texts (more controllable). I quite believe she was sincere, since i set the date at 6h30, having answered at 5, 3h after reception of her text ( she decided to make other plans, the cinema). I was probably quite lucky that her showing ended up just at the time of the date and that the cinema was close to our meeting point.


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PostPosted: Fri Feb 06, 2009 11:58 pm 
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Just a quick update:

Tomorrow, a week will have passed since our first date. Although I think it was a good one, I haven't heard back from her yet.
I really want to see her again, but on the other hand, I don't want to appear needy to her or to be sent into the LJBF zone. Should have done more, that is send more SOI to her (text play?) or is the freezing strategy the good one to make her choose me in the end ? I was kind of thinking to wait until sunday evening to see if she reacts, and if she doesn't, then maybe try to set up a date next week. What would be the best approach (text ideas are welcomed) ?


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