Ok, so I went back to a HB's place the other night and started getting heavy with the kissing and fondling. I was getting her really excited and she was saying she wanted me to shag her so bad etc. but when I went to take her dress off she stopped me and said she couldn't because it was that time of the month. She said to wait a few days and she would then screw my brains out.

We were meant to hook up this weekend but she called me today tells me that she is sorry but things are moving too fast for her and she wants to wait a bit. She says that I've already moved things faster with her than any other guy she has been with (this was day 2 by the way) and she'll catch up with me next week.

So what is she trying to tell me and where do I go from here?

Thanks.

Is anyone able to help out at all?

are you in a relationship with her? cuz if not she can possibly have buyers remorse, like you could have crossed the line of no return, you were kissing and then went to fondling meaning you foreplay and you either go to sex or you kind of got screwed and she did a LMR on you, but i wouldnt know what to say to "im having my period" (if she was lying)

it has nothing to do with that. Girls are obviously gonna want to shag when they're horny right? Well when they aren't they're gonna think twice before just banging any guy.

_________________
Slept On Rappers
http://hiphoprising.blogspot.com

No, I'm not in a relationship with her. I asked a friend and he thinks she might want a relationship though. She actually picked me up (don't mean to sound like a dick but I'm a good looking guy, lol) and has been initiating all the contact, texting very regularly. She told me she has never had a one night stand and that even her previous boyfriends didn't get this far on the second date. When she said she was on her period she said she wishes she wasn't because she wanted me to screw her so bad and I know a lot of girls that are insecure/uncomfortable having sex with a new guy on their period, especially since this would have been the first time between us. I told her I've been single for a long time because I didn't want a relationship for a long time so she might think I'm a player. Is she trying to play it safe because she thinks I will ditch her if I have sex with her too early or have I been ditched?

You might see how she feels mid cycle when estrogen/testosterone peak.

No she's self conscious. I mean if she really trusts you she's obviously not gonna think you're gonna leave. I'm just saying she's not gonna openly admit to wanting to fuck when she's not horny.

_________________
Slept On Rappers
http://hiphoprising.blogspot.com

I think you were ditched, she made a awesome excuse. She has probly used this before. How long have you known her before you tried to full close? because this seems like this girl is my definition of a nester. She is getting settled for a relationship and was testing to see how far you would go. If your gamer and just want girls, get out of there.

_________________
Happy Hunting,

Dsbubba

Looks like I am getting ditched. I did the blank text thing...

Me: (blank text)
HB: Sending girls blank msg's in your spare time now?
Me: What? Come on babe, you don't need to make a "you sent me a blank message" excuse just to talk to me.
HB: Haha oh get me a bucket!
Me: Really, it wasn't me, must've been someone else :p Do you like to play pool?
HB: Why do you ask? :p
Me: Why do you think?:p I feel like playing pool, what are you up to this weekend?
HB: I have to catch up with visiting friends and... (basically says she isn't free). To be honest.. I'm not a huge pool fan haha.. unless its a pool party!

I then call her and tease her about being the only person I know that doesn't like pool but had to cut the conversation short because of work. I then send a text, "We'll catch up another time, how's next week looking?" and got no reply.

I've been living the single life for a while now and all the girls I only want a casual relationship with end up wanting a relationship, but this girl has caught my attention and is the first I've met in a long time that I wanted to get to know better to see if she could be a GF. Is there anything I can do or is it a waste of time?

Dsbubba: We had a date and kissed about a month ago and she went away for 3 weeks on holiday, plenty of texting going on, mostly initiated by her. She got back in town and this is when the second date as described in the first post happened.

The back round info helps a bit, but i still think she might be going in the other direction. Idk this for sure because i don't know her. Also it sounds like you come on a little strong sometimes. Back it down a notch build more comfort before you go into a straight wanna go out. Talk for a few mins=utes then ask her. Also, game a few girls at a time just for the reason that all your focus isn't on one girl, because you won't feel the need to text her all the time. BUt the her initiating txting is good. If you have any more questions, alliterate more so i can know the situation better. This is interesting haha, i think she is gaming you.

_________________
Happy Hunting,

Dsbubba

Cool, thanks for your help man.
Haha, that's exactly what I was thinking the other day!

It's kinda easy to figure out... She wanted you when she was initiating all the effort, texting you, etc., because she perceived you to be HV compared to her. Now that you begun initiating everything, she believes she is HV compared to you and women are hard-wired to not be attracted to men who are of less value than themselves.

What you should do is freeze-out, and go out with other women. This might not be salvageable... it's ALWAYS less effort to find new girls than fix things with current ones (unless you're in a LTR). Chalk it up to something learned for next time. You did good already.... you were denied sex out of luck, outside of your power. Remember too that women gain connections to men they sleep with, and she hasn't slept with you so you are almost starting from scratch with her in terms of seducing.

Women also base things off emotion, not logic. She probably *felt* that it was a spur-of-the-moment thing, and now you are trying to date her, which is not why she was into you to begin with.

Ethan is right. Try a freeze and see what happens. I think the mistake can be traced back to you changing your game mid stream. You went from exciting spur of the moment guy to relationship guy. Women want that change, but they want to have to work for it.

What you should have done is talked on the phone maybe once after the denial that night, and then FREEZE the holy hell outta that situation. Come back next week (as the still exciting spur of the moment guy), and offer a chance to meet up. Now we know for next time.

I know it hurts to freeze out someone when you really want them but you have to make a choice, do I want some gratification now? Or awesome payoff later?

^^Exactly

I forgot to give specific advice for the situation, and since we're all learning and growing as a group from these boards, this is how I would've handled her.

When she told you she was on your period, you have to show with 100% certainty you are OK with it. As in, cool things down! Ask if she wants to just watch some tv or make a sandwich or whatever. You want to treat her as if you just had sex (you weren't after sex anyways, it just happened, it was not the main goal), and make her feel she is still worth hanging out with.

*side note. This is assuming you like this girl. For me, i sleep with girls I like, and want to have a relationship with.

Inviting her to play pool later was fine, I would've worded it something like "I'm going to go play pool at so-and-so tonight, come by, but don't expect to get as lucky as our last night out =D"

With this you're trying to reinforce that sexual tension that was definitely there, but perhaps forgotten by her. It could be interpreted in a non-sexual way too, in terms of playing pool, which helps reinforce the fact that you aren't just looking for sex, but your last encounter is on your mind!

At this point, if she still blows you off, I'd forget her. If she does come by, and at whatever point things start to get into the seduction phase I'd make a joke about something like "oh we can't do this, I'm on my period!", obviously laughing. It'd be a good way to cut through some of the sexual tension that wasn't released the time before, and still make you a challenge to her.

OMG!!!!

Could it be that she was ACTUALLY TELLING THE TRUTH?

There's a real simple explanation. She was on her period the first night, and her anti-slut defense kicked in after you left. She wasn't blowing you off, or "ditching" you, she just didn't want to feel like a slut. Its not rocket science; what she said is actually what she meant.

Assume the best and just be cool with it.

She'll go out again, you just have to take to her out in a way she is comfortable with; such as a social gathering. If things go bad, its not hard for you to go on to other girls.