Some god gave me a trophy situation. I'm not using it right



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PostPosted: Wed Dec 17, 2008 2:13 am 
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So this is a different situation than you're used to. I have this best friend and shes a complete fucking beauty. HB10 in anyones eyes. Anyway ever since we were little we've been flirty and kind of expected that some day we'd eventually hook up. I'm in grade 12 right now and i've been fucking her all year. And she's not even close to being a slut, I'm her first non-boyfriend sexual partner, but the problem is, she's so so beautiful and the sex is so so crazy even male teachers call me "lucky bastard" awkwardy enough") but for some reason I can't get off! At first i was like "Oh cool i last long, girls will like this" but really it's a curse. I've been with 4 different girls and none of them have gotten me off.. I get off fine in everything but intercourse. And I've heard it all "You're nervous, you need to relax, more foreplay, do it doggy-style man," but none of it works.. She gets upset thinking shes not good enough even though i bet i'll never find another one as good as her. So if you've had the same experience please share.
Unfortunately that's not even the biggest problem. She's so cool and so god damn gorgeous that I'm getting one-itis big time. She's so busy being a validictorian, perfect student, student council president that i don't think she has room to think of an emotional connection. She hates relationships from past experience and would hate commitment in fear of a needy relationship.. Anyway.. All i want is for her to like me more than i like her. make this happen?

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PostPosted: Wed Dec 17, 2008 3:58 am 
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as for the getting off never during sex that is very common and guys are actually usually more upset at that than premature ejaculation. if your on ANY kind of meds that could be it, ANY drugs, that could do it, or past bad experiences could fuck it up, which would cause some sort of nervousness that actually doesn't even surface to you. i would consider seeing a therapist could possibly help. if you wear condoms get her on the pill and dont use them anymore, just make sure neither of you are fucking around. other than those ideas i cant really think of much more hope that helps bud.


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PostPosted: Wed Dec 17, 2008 5:27 am 
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Have you ever thought of PRETENDING to get off? Wear a condom, act like you had an orgasm, pretty much immediately go to the bathroom to "clean up" and she'll never know the difference and be completely happy that she has "satisfied" you and you don't have to worry about it either, as you obviously have never gotten off during sex it can't bother you too badly that you aren't with this.


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PostPosted: Wed Dec 17, 2008 3:47 pm 
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I can't wrap my mind around being with a 10 and not getting off...LOL I'd probably lose a load or 2 getting out of my pants.... I'd say do a google search on sexual malfunctions, and see if you can find anything. I know certain meds will cause it, but other than that, good luck brother!


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PostPosted: Wed Dec 17, 2008 8:15 pm 
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Look into thinner condoms. Another suggestion is to do like Roady said and if she's on birth control and neither of you are sleeping around without using condoms (very important) then try it without a condom with her.

I recommend that you start learning about and excercising your kegel muscles. Having a good control of your sex muscles not only enables you to last longer, but it also helps you to get off when you do want to. Figure out what works when when you're masturbating and then try to replicate that during sex. Use a condom when you're masturbating as well, that way you get used to it like that.

Remember, the most important thing to keep in mind when having sex is that you want it to be safe sex, but if neither of you has any STIs and she's on some form of effective birth control, I'd discuss losing the rubber. I have a similar problem and the only way I've been able to get off during sex is in one specific position that works just right. One time I had sex with a girl without a condom though and it was 10x easier to finish.

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PostPosted: Sat Dec 20, 2008 11:29 pm 
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Crazily enough, it feels better with condoms.. Though they're all great words of wisdom. So that's part two of the mystery.

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PostPosted: Sun Dec 21, 2008 5:57 pm 
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I assume you can climax in other ways? think about foreplay more for you than her, it could also be you are so wrapped up in the outcome that she could finish with you that : "if i come then its all over" - literally?
You both have other pressures on you at this time of your lives that could also be creating dysfunctions in other ways, try to slow the sexual intemacy down. Maybe a romantic evening and bedtime away from your usual place like a hotel may help.. theres always your doctor to give you a check up if not for sexual related advice, body chemistry may be outta sync.

Good luck and enjoy the moment now while you can rather than fear the future.

J1f


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PostPosted: Fri Jan 02, 2009 6:15 am 
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with lots of work, i got off. Now i get off every time no problem.. It's great. It was all mental.. The mind is comme fucking incroyable.

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