I have read in many places, don't talk to girls about politics, religion, and bad relationships. I'm sure there are many other topics to avoid. I want to know though, why is it that we are told to avoid talking about these subjects?

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When books say not to talk to girls about religion or politics they mean specifically in pick-up and in general light-hearted social situations. The reason being that they are too serious. When a girl is out in a social situation she's looking to have fun and to engage in activities that are upbeat and entertaining. While a discussion of religion or politics might be intellectually stimulating they are not light-heartedly entertaining. Therefore they reduce the level of fun she is having and make her not want to spend time with you on the night because she'd have more fun with someone else who is being playful and upbeat.

As for talking about bad relationships, again they're too serious and they bring the mood down. Plus if the stories relate specifically to YOUR bad relationships then she'll unconsciously connect the notion of a bad relationship to you.

you never go ass to mouth! lol

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ah ok so it's just talking about early on I guess I can agree with that. However I think that politics and religion are a great way to get to know what someone really believes and who they are on a deeper level as a person. I talk about these topics all the time with women I know and even disagree with what they have to say many times. The thing about it is though is I approach it without judging them for having their beliefs. I think because of this it actually deepens the connection with the girl pretty significantly. If one knows how to listen correctly and speak in an open minded way I think these topics are a great way to provoke peoples passions. I reward women for this great passion that they have not the actual issues they speak of and I have great success with these so called taboo subjects.

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I avoid because my perspective is so unique and well formed... that if I start talking about these things all their arguments will be last year to me... and would be really difficult to get them to such a level of enlightment

heh I guess it works for me because I am somewhat of a skeptic. I am very open minded because really there is no way that we can know that we are absolutely correct on our beliefs, all we can do is gather evidence to support what we think we believe.

For example if I said that there were green penguins in this world it would be very difficult for you to prove to me that green penguins don't exist, but if there was randomly found one green penguin your whole arguement would be shattered.

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You have balls yes, but how often do you actually use them?

Self help.. that's mental masterbation. Self Destruction.. now we're getting somewhere!
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I agree that it's usually better to save it for a little after you've had the chance to get comfortable with one another. A big reason why is that these issues are all so divisive, and if she's got an opposing opinion on something than you do and she is passionate about it, there's a chance you'll never get off the ground. Rye Lee offered good advice in another thread (about religion I believe) about finding interesting aspects of the subject that don't force you into opposing camps: religion/existentialism, politics/third-world equality, relationships/loyalty, blah blah blah. If you've got something of worth to say about something she's into, why would you pass up the chance to DHV?

Also keep in mind that it's all based on context. Fiind out about her early in the conversation, and if she's interested in those things and you have something interesting to say about it, go for it. If you're in school and she's a poli-sci student (who's actually interested in her studies), go for it! On the other hand, if she's a ditz whose political knowledge doesn't go beyond knowing that Democrats = left, Republicans = right, then talking about Turkey's dilemma of maintaing the ideals of a secular state between the pincers of rising Islamic discontent and Kurdish nationalism might be a bit of a reach, at any time...

War is another one.

The reason why you avoid them is becaues it is likely that you'll have contradicting viewpoints even if not entirely opposing. As a result it can cause distance between you two and even result in an argument; not entirely the best thing when you're trying to promote good feelings and attraction.

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"The 'Brick Walls' are there to allow you to prove how badly you want something!" ~ Randy Pausch

~ Rye

politics, religions, bad relationships and war as rye mentioned, are all the products of conflict, emotional and mental difference, and just bad communication in general. Why talk about subjects like this? Itll get her in the mind set of it - and she is going to link the conversation with you. Its quite literally your own doing.
Aside from this she may stand on different ground to what you do.

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Bad relationships yes....

But you can talk about your relationships and how good they were and how the both of you loved and took care of each other, you can talk about little things that guys do that bother you( and the girl of course) and then you can describe how the perfect relationship should look like etc etc...

see I disagree, I think the problem is that people don't know how to argue about these things in a productive and peaceful manner. I think its very important to focus on having a common ground when talking about these topics because without common ground there is no arguement its just passionate and conflict. I have found it really effective to talk about these things because they are interesting conversation topics. It may have something to do with the beliefs I hold, but I feel its important to make people aware of beliefs that could be holding them back in a peaceful way. Is that not what this entire community we are in is about?

In regards to those of you that said talking about politics, religion can be very negative.. well sure it can be, but isn't it your choice as the leader of the conversation of what to focus on? I lead my conversations on these topics in positive directions a decent amount of the time. Maybe its just me, but I have had a good amount of success with topics like these even with girls that some would consider ditzy. Most people have surprised me on what they actually know. I know many girls that just put on a ditzy girl act because they think it pleases guys that are actually extremely intelligent and articulate when the need arises.

_________________
You have balls yes, but how often do you actually use them?

Self help.. that's mental masterbation. Self Destruction.. now we're getting somewhere!
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