I am about to move back to school and this year I will be living with 7people. Out of the 7, guy #1 will call him Greg is completey alpha. like just over the top confidence, strikes conversations with EVERYBODY and is nearly a legend at my school. Guy #2-4 are semi-alpha. They have proven to out alpha me in our first year together at college.

I have recently seen one of the guys, who is slightly more alpha then me will call him Craig, and I think that since i have been practicing being social and staying out of my own thoughts has helped me be on more equal footing with this guy.

I'd say at this point on the pecking order i am the third man out of seven. This really isn't an acceptable level of status for me. I am going to try to climb the ladder although it will be hard to surpass Greg.

My question is, do you think living with people who are more alpha is good in a way? Since alpha males are usually competetive and talkative it forces me, if i want to move up, to have to be talkative and competitive as well vs. living with a bunch of betas is easier per say, but when you do come across an alpha you get eaten alive since you are so used to running the show with the betas you don't know how to act.

I have changed a lot from last school year, from being a fairly passive guy, into a quite social savvy guy. I am scared that when I go back to school my old beta ways of thinking are going to start getting to me again.

It is definatly good imo. Being around the best your going to pick stuff up. Also the social proof will be brilliant, if you cant be the guy every1 wants to be, you better be that guys main man!

Befriend more, become equal with greg. Dont try to go over him or he will get pissed off.

Yes Madals, thats a good point. being around socially sound people will allow me to learn some new material.

The house has 2 betas, who aren't a problem. I am not so much worried of overtaking Greg just more concerned of being atleast 2nd guy in charge. so taking alpha status over the other 2-3 guys is the main priority.

Last year some of these guys would take little cheap shots or chirps to try and lower my value. What kind of things can I do this year to show that I am high value and not someone to fuck with.

Dont give an emotional responce to their attempts. Simple as.

If you dont understand what i mean i could go into more detail, but i suggest you read some AMOG material.

The opportunity is there so take it. Fuck living with weak males, coz theyll never get girls. You want girls, hang with these boys.

Alphas about being cool and all, but who takes care of the shit when it hits the fan? just like in nature, the beasts gotta fight. No need to 'surpass' him, just make a fuckload of friends and get to know everyone. Know who you want to be man, don't try be 'better than someone else' just aim to be better than who you are now all the time.

Lol if they try 'lower ur value' just laugh at it man - its fun dude! Shit, everyones gotta take shit now and then. Goes around comes around. Just cross your arms and shake your head as if your saying 'dude you talk alot of shit!' (in a humourous tone though). Main thing - don't let them think they 'got you' coz if they do thats it, you officially been done.

Little things - don't let them pat you on the back, continually put your arm around them because their your friend, don't give in because you 'feel you have to' if you don't want to drink something, dont drink it, if you want to do something then do it. But have the attitude that you're 'looking out' for their best interests. etc. And its not a game of dominance, my man. Across the board, treating them with genuine respect always wins out.

true, but also dont be a cold emotional stone. If they're ur friends, well, i usually just smirk and shake my head without moving. Don't get stuck in that frame sometimes, when you just stay still and it looks as if you don't know what to say.

emotionally? Reward good behaviour with BIG positive responses, bad behaviour e.g. jibes with small smirks and subtle responses here and there. In the long run, they'll learn being respectful around you gets a much better response than shit-talking.

serious props man. that was a great post.

Ya, the main thing is, when it comes down to it...we are all buddies. I shouldn't need to try and outdo them.

the thing is i dont give a fuck if someone is more alpha then me. my one concern is that i want to feel comfortable within their prescence and if i'm gaming a bitch i don't feel too initimated to talk. you know what i mean?

i just want to be anxiety free around the alphas. if i don't happen to the be most alpha so be it, aslong as i can say what i want when i want and feel confident about it.

I guess I just need to be self-validated. If I say something, and get no attention or get no response, i can't let myself get down over it, or get caught up in overthinking what I just said because what is in the past, is not worth worrying about. (a common thing that used to happen to me in the presence of the alphas)

I hope I'm making sense haha, Its 835AM where I live and I just got back from a night of partying and drinking downtown all night. This is the second night in a row of this so my mind is kinda mashed right now.

later boys.

Forget calling them the 'alphas'. They're your 'cool friends'. You're cool. Group yourself in together with them. They're not over there and you here. You're in the same boat, lol.

Most of my friends, outsiders would describe as "alpha". Alpha, as if its some term to be afraid of? Do you think alphas run scared from the label of alphas? Who do you think labels "alphas"? You get where i'm going lol. You see, I don't view my friends as AMOG1, AMOG2 and AMOG3! How nerdy is that! Lol.

One is the big loud guy who speaks his mind but has a great sense of loyalty to his true friends. One is super cool and makes heaps of friends and commands respect because its truly in his nature to connect with people. The other is one of the best singers I've ever heard, and the ladies love his smooth but sometimes cheesy ways. And me? Well, shit, I look out for those guys when the going gets tough! Just as they would for me. So your friends aren't objective labels man. They're real people with real problems, but have learned to smile in the face of adversity and say, "fuck you!" Lol.

Bad nights are ok, man! Just tell yourself constantly "sooner or later i'll get to where i want" and enjoy the moment, learn from every experience. And slot negative moments into 'for later solo analysis' i.e. i'll analyze what happened when i'm at home' and just move on. Square one.

Try this on for size - whatever reaction you are feeling, it is because you are LETTING YOURSELF feel it. If they say 'HAHAHA YOU FUCKTARD!' Imagine he's saying it to himself. Then proceed to feel sorry for him and give him an 'aww...poor guy. Would you like me to stroke your head like mommy used to when you were young??' all in fun though, dude, the shittiest friend is always the one who takes fun jibes too seriously. The killjoy who ends up on his own, I guess.

Philosophy: Remember an outward expression is always manifested inwardly first. So negative expressions from someone else is always actually INSIDE them, so realize its their problem and not yours.

the thing is, when i try to speak to people who are more alpha i often lose my train of thought and what i am saying doesn't come out the way i want it too.

this never happens with people i feel total comfort with.

what i am trying to do to overcome this is to talk a lot and try to tell as many stories as possible. this way speaking will become more natural to me.

any words of wisdom on this or ways to improve my speaking abilities/stories.

The only real way to fix this is to just tell your self you are more alpha then them act as if you run the house. Other than that there is nothing you can really do other than check yourself.

check yourself? does that mean making sure you're trying to keep yourself from projecting inwardly.

No it means to check your self, find the reasons why you feel less alpha and change it and make sure you take steps everyday to become THE alpha.

It's all in your perception bro. Look, if you were Donald Trump, would you lose your fucking train of thought with this little chode here? The answer is: NO. Get out man, and get a life. Lol, I mean that nicely. Remember, life is a game of VALUE. Give more value to people, and they will start to respect you more.

In terms of self-validation, the answer is, DECIDE WHO YOU ARE AND WHAT YOU STAND FOR. Then proceed not to be an asshole about it, but to live by those standards and not compromise them for anyone (but not to be a total dick either - give and take, but be purposeful in your decisions etc).