So I just got out of a LTR of 3.5 years about 3 months. I decided I might as well get back into the dating game again as a first step. I probably met about 7 girls in the past 2 months (I am not actively trying to pick up women). However a good majority of them flake or lose interest right away AFTER intense interest. At first I figured it was something other than me, but after it happened a second, and a third time, I began to assume it might be an issue I have. Here are some details:

1st girl - Only girl that did not lose interest, played tennis with her and slept at her place afterwards. She moved to canada for a month and we messsaged back a little
2nd girl - Girl (about HB7) messaged me on an online dating site (joined just for kicks) with interest. We hung out once, I slept over and she insisted that we hang out again before I left. She aimed me periodically but only with very short messages but would never schedule a date when messaged her saying "I know this good restaurant, lets check it ou".
3rd girl - An acquiatence of mine that I met at a bar, she seemed slightly intoxicated but was all over me, trying to kiss me, grabbing my ass etc. She insisted that we HAVE to hang out. I message her on facebook the next morning and she responds be asking when we should hang out. I respond "Lets hang out this weekend", she never responds and this happens 3 more times. Each time she always says "lets hang out this weekend!", then never replies when I suggest a day.
4th girl - Met her at a bar; had several things in common, built great rapport. I left to get back to my friends, but she INSISTED I get her number before I left. I text her the next day to come downtown with my buddies but she never responded.
5th girl - Girl I dated for about 3 weeks. We just fooled around and hung out but I could sense something was wrong (she would never call or inititate anything, even anything physical, and wouldnt care if she looked like crap in front of me). Eventually pulled me aside and told me that she just wants to be friends. I agree (the truth, I was losing attraction for her and actually wanted to move on).

Even though I was not interested in some of these girls, the principle of them flaking and losing interest after intense interest still has completely dumbfounded me. The most confusing part is that I did not act clingy or was too available after meeting them. What I am wondering is if this is just a rough patch since its only a few girls or if I am really doing something wrong here. I don't know much about pick up artistry but I do know the basics. Any input would be helpful.

Hard to tell. It could very well be just a rough patch or maybe the girls you are going after... Im not sure.

The one thing that could help you out is Mystery's Necklace trick. Buy a very cheap necklace (Im talking like 5 or 10 bucks max). Wear it to a club or when you go out. When you get a girls number and get good vibes when you are ready to leave here is what you do:

1.) Start to walk away
2.) turn back around to face her either slowly or at medium speed and act/look like you just got an idea.
3.) look at her in her eyes and say "your not a thief are you?"
4.) she looks at you in a weird way and says "no, why?"
5.) say "Ok, I want to give you this so you have something to remember me by. BUT I WANT IT BACK THE NEXT TIME I see you."
6.) take the cheap necklace off and give it to her.

This should definately help you out...

It sounds like overall the girls you have pickup had buyers remorse. Which I bet it may have to do with the girls getting too high of an interest in you. You may want to try not to build up their interest as much and see how that works out for you.

i can relate a little man.. i had a very intense LTR where i was one on one with a girl 24/7 through the end of college. it ended badly.. also with me getting mono and having to finish my last year of college pretty much alone after dropping a year. after that, pretty much up until this point in my life right now, ive been DUMBFOUNDED by women and how they act around me. but i think ive learned a little bit and ill try and help you out, but keep in mind, im still not back to where i was

ok, well, the thing about having a LTR is in order to really have one with a top female you gotta be able to connect with ONE girl in a way that MOST average chumps out there can't do. Sounds like you did this.. but the bad news is that this now will work against you in picking up girls while single. Because in order to be a really good pick up artist, you have to be able to connect with ALL women in a way that most average chumps can't (im one of the average chumps in this category).

What I experienced was that initially after breaking up with my girl and going single, ALL kinds of hot women were attracted to me but after the initial effect they'd do the same thing and flake..

It's because.. im guessing.. youre ABILITY and POTENTIAL to be a great lover is proven to yourself and others and shows in your own confidence and social status BUT you, freshly from a breakup, at least subconsciously place every prospect in your previous void where your ex was. Women are put off by this because they are not logical, they are intuitive on feelings.. so, the fact that you just came from a 3.5yr LTR doesn't really matter because what they see now is an available guy who is conditioned for a 3.5 yr LTR (used to having constant sex) and i think they see that as NEEDY! It fucked me up and for the longest time I haven't had a real gf who i really really liked in 3 years and i think this is why because my ex was one i really really liked (loved)

You're better off cheating on your girlfriend when things are going downhill with someone you really like and moving the relationship directly to her when you break up. Then you're never available and so women see you as higher status.....................

For years i was perplexed by women and why they would flake out on me after proving myself by being loved by an alpha female (hottest broad and worth millions in the bank) and i lost that confidence and status i had simply because i didn't understand how women think. Understand that and you'll save yourself a lot of trouble. Just remember IT'S NOT LOGICAL, it's taken at face value at the moment, so if you want to focus on something, BE YOUR BEST RIGHT NOW, ALL THE TIME...

That's why a man remembers women he's truly loved for his whole life and why women remember a man she's loved for a year then forgets him.

That's why a man can become a soldier and go away for three years only to return to find his wife is now in love with someone else. Evolutionarily, men are more likely to die, so its a good thing for a woman to do, i guess

Yeah, it sucks budy, but that's why eve ate the apple

and im still single after practically marrying a girl and genuinely WANTING a new LTR..................... good luck, the only thing that's helped me is being in the moment through meditation, it makes you relate more on the lines of girl thinking, if that's possible

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ChrisNome
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'you ever dance with the devil in the pale moonlight' 'see ya around kid'

'high virtue is nonvirtuous'

You know,

Style mentions this problem in the Game. He says something about the perils of being a PUA and discusses how the easier it is to pick up a girl, the easier it is to lose her.

It's possible the girls you're focusing on aren't looking for LTRs. Were you looking for an LTR when you initially met them?

You might be picking up girls that you would have been scared to pick up in the past (yes I am assuming that your game has improved as compared to before your 3.5 year relationship).

Think of it this way. If you're an AMOG and you're the fucking shit not everyone is cool enough to be in an LTR with you. Most chicks can't handle that shit because they're weak. So keep playing till you find one that's up for the challenge.

It's a game of statistics. Since now you can pick up many more girls than before, the odds are in your favor. BUT finding a good LTR girl takes time.

So keep going out, keep sarging and continue to do so until you find a girl that's worth keeping. When you start a relationship with someone keep the same frame you would have as when you were single. It may neg them in such a way that they realize they want a LTR out of you. I'm saying be scarce.

You'll be fine bro

CPT

its just seems that maybe a tiny bit of follow up game would help with getting them to open up more often after initial meeting, ive found vin dicarlos ideas on creating open loops with text messaging or with phone messages brilliant. Sending a message such as 'woah, just saw something that reminded me of you' or leaving a voice mail message thats purposefully is cut off half way through while your talking about something intresting can be very effective.

Personally i use texting because they dont have to be 'in' or can reply when they are not busy, and most girls love little messages especially intriuging open loop messages. Just remeber that you shouldnt tie up a loop without starting a new 1.

sorry if this doesnt help, i may of gone off on a bit of a tangent to what your original problem was...

slick

Slick,

That's a good idea man. I just wrote down the open loop concept.

Thanks dude

CPT

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