I just came back from a night out. Here in Rome it is 5:34 and I must say I had fun, but I still feel frustrated. I went to the Art Cafe and I saw a lot of pretty women, very nice ones. Say 8, 9, women, I saw one 10... Brazilian, I don't know her name. That is my problem, I just don't know what to say. I see her, think: "wow she is nice", and then I freeze. I have read the openers online and didn't have them with me. My feeling said that I needed something else, something quicker. When a women just passes you, I feel stupid to say: "Hi, can I get you opinion on something?" I feel it is just not fast enough. I tried to think of stuff, but I can only come up with standard stuff that I think will bore her. When this happens, things like:

"How are you?"or "What are you doing here?" or "You look nice."

Some women here in Italy love to have compliments. I don't want to give them to them, because it will show I'm all over her which I am not. I just want her to like me and see if we can take this further then only a conversation or the dance floor.

I admit, I need help. I need to get a kick in my ass to get me started. Something to get the creative part of my mind working. Be able to say stuff without feeling the consequenses, not feeling weird if it is not the thing she is looking for.

My first goal is to be able to interact normally with women, just have a normal conversation with them and not let them see that I would like to have more then just the conversation. I would like to hide my see-through-ness and make her feel comfortable talking to me.

What do you do when a girl passes you by in a club and the music is very loud. There is not a lot of time, because she is on her way to somewhere else. Being interesting with the first thing to say, or negging her with the first thing that you say is important in this case. I tried, maybe not hard enough yet, and I can not come up with fast openers that will leave her standing and will interest her to talk to me. Do you have any idea? I am willing to try anything, because I sick of the looking at them and thinking, "go up there man, you are a good guy. But what the fuck should you say?" and then stay in the same place.

Thanks for reading anyway, I hope you can come up with some tips.

Have a good one!

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Belushy

"The one that never falls, never rises"

As far as approaching girls at dance clubs, I agree it is tough b/c the music is so loud. As a matter of fact, I stopped going to dance clubs long ago because it is hard to run the routines I normally use. I am pretty sure that there is a thread somewhere on this board where someone talks about the noise/club issue, just hunt around and maybe you'll find it.

Sounds like right now the biggest hurdle you have is just getting the ball rolling. I don't have any original advice to give. I just encourage you to fight the fear and approach the girls. Seriously, there is ZERO downside. Remember, everyone posting on here (myself included) has had to go through a lot of misses before we started getting hits. Happens to everyone.

Just keep in mind that YOU are doing her a favor by talking to her. She doesn't want to rap with you? So what - look around, there are 20 other girls in the place who would be glad to hang out. Just leave her behind and move onto the next one. This is the attitude you have to have.

Good luck! I'm envious - you are in Rome with all those beautiful Italian girls and I am stuck in Green Bay with...well, not much.

Thanks man,

Yesterday I tried opening my first set and it didn't go exactly as I thought it would have. I opened the jealous girl friend opener, there were two girls. The moment I opened one of them didn't even join in the conversation, so I was left with one girl and not a set..., Can you help me on what went wrong here?

Anyway I didn't feel bad afterward, I only felt better and I failed! It was a good first step for my mind, and thoughts. A good first step has been made!

Thanks

If you are ever in Rome, let me know, maybe we can do this together!

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Belushy

"The one that never falls, never rises"

I think in Rome you will have less problems than I, because the city where I go out is very smal. Rome is a big city, if you have problems with approach ( what I also have sometimes) you must think these:
It's only a game. like Jak said before, if she doesn't want to rap with you, turn around and take an other HB.

In Rome, there are beautiful italian girls, I know it.

I envy you, because I'm only in a little city, and I always see the same HBs, so I don't have so much selection

And not to forget:

Forza Roma.

Nice work! The first steps are always the hardest....

Keep us informed on your progress! If I have something new I'll post it here.

Yer well done,
If you're still having trouble approaching girls, or just holding conversation normally, then try the Mystery challenge.
Simple

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..Better a witty fool than a foolish wit..