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You're only a year younger so maybe I can shed some light on this. I have been dating multiple women for about 5 months now. I understand the whole settling down but from experience with LTR I usually don't want to talk to these women after our time has ended. I don't like it. At the moment I am also struggling with the "monogamy" thing. Maybe it's because of the holidays and how people seem to hook up around this time and settle down.
I am looking for a woman that I seek to have her around- that's the first step. If I am not contacting you to hang out at least once, then it won't work out. I know certain women get to me- so until then - I'll be going through a few of them.
Personally though, I want to travel in 3 months. So a relationship won't be an ideal place for me at this time.
I am glad you can relate. I am struggling with this monogamy thing, too.
The main idea I see here, though, is that you have your own belief system and screen for women, perhaps more "assertively" than I do. Besides, you are traveling soon, so objectively, some things you can't do. Boundaries, that's part of relationships, as something as simple as travel can sometimes make or break the deal.
Thanks for sharing your experience, and cool to know you're in my age bracket.
PS - Do you find excessively dating women to sometimes be a waste of time?
I know I shouldn't say it, but sometimes, it can be. I love women, but I'm a busy dude with my career, too. We seem to make allowance and bend for woman when it comes to our schedule more than we should, or is that just me. I am getting better at that, though. I just like hanging out, I guess, it is all really priorities, though. If I was as busy as I needed to be, I sure wouldn't be in three serious LTRs. . . how would I have the time? At that point, I figure something that's less of a time constraint. Dating is time consuming. Being in our mid-twenties, perhaps you can relate to this feeling, too. This begs the questions, should I consider screening for short-term vs long term to make for a more ample schedule? Sounds lame, but I am being sincere.
No, it is definitely not easy saying no to a woman, especially if it is one you kind of like. I think the busy schedule factors in when we see that we have some free time finally and a woman sounds like a good pass time at the moment. Probably the ladies gentleman in you. The company of a woman can definitely be great.
Dating is consuming which brings me to my belief system. As I grow older i realize that time is precious and in the long run will a 3rd night of booty in a week be worth it ? Maybe not. I have cut down to how many women I date at a time. Right now I am 3. One is a once a week fuck buddy and her schedule is as hectic as mine but it works lovely. Another is also a once a week because of how her schedule works. The third is somewhat new but she seems to be more trouble than what it's worth. To be determined.
I think you should screen what each women brings to the table and how she will fit into your life at the moment. So far the women I have picked are flexible in scheduling and cards have it that we can hang at times that I have downtime.
Just a thought.
CHAT
