I am not quite sure what "aspiration" means but I am assuming it means "where do you see yourself in 5 years?" or or "what are your life dreams?" is that what aspiration means?

The problem is, I got none.

I closed my eyes and tried to imagine my aspirations, but I really cant think of anything. I think I am too scared to dream. because if my dream doesnt come true, then that would suck. so I better not dream.

is a man supposed to have aspirations? if yes, how do i find my aspirations?

Of course. I can't really comment on aspirations since I am trying to find my purpose but nothing is hotter to a woman than a man on a mission. Keep soul searching my friend...we all got something to contribute to this life.

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In a funk? Read this

pua-lounge/the-importance-patience-this ... his%20game

This whole "have a great purpose in life" thing, is %100 mental masturbation, bullshit. It has literally nothing to do with getting women, at all.
I've known dudes with grand plans that make no sense, or are very logical on both ends of the success spectrum with women. Same in reverse. Total deadbeats with no plans whatsoever on both ends of the success spectrum.

Does the average guy with major, practical plans tend to better on average? Yes, but that's because most people who can make a good plan, are reality based and have their shit together.

I keep saying this, because I think so few guys understand this. You know how when you were little and you'd cover your eyes to make yourself disappear? This was because you lacked a good grasp of outside actors beyond yourself. For all intents and purposes, women never really make it past this point. She really doesn't care about you(she can't). The only way she can care about you, is how you relate to her. How you make her feel. She doesn't give a shit about what you think or what you do, she only cares about the end result of how she feels with you. There is literally nothing about you that she cares about. Nothing. The only thing she cares about is how you can make her feel.

That's why a list of traits a woman wants in a man, seems to consistently bear almost no resemblance to the men she dates. Ask her instead how she imagines feeling with this man, what types of emotions he will stir in her, and odds are, her string of lovers fit a good number of these emotions, and possibly just about all of them.

The only extent to which she cares about things about you, directly relate to status/making her friends jealous. But still, it's how it relates to her/how it can promote her socially.

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RSDTyler

Versalis,

That is a great post and I learned a couple of things I didn't know.

But my question is not about how to impress women. In fact, it's not about women at all.

It's about how a man can live a happy life.

the problem is, I don't have any aspirations. some people want to have a 6 bedroom house with a pool. some people want to have a fast car. some people want to cure cancer.

me: I live my life "day to day" without thinking about tomorrow. I have no dreams.

Consider hedonism(serious).

I guess I have a lot of long term plans, but to be honest, I'm not all that concerned about them. The details of my plans have shifted almost by the year. Honestly, not only has experience shaped it, so too has my rolodex and an ever changing business environment.

It's good to think about the future, but living right now is still the most important part. Until you're happy in the day-to-day, you don't even begin to grasp what you want five or twenty years from now. It's either wrong, or fantasy(what you imagine will make you happy, and probably won't).

Big accomplishments don't lead to happiness. It's the little things along the way that do. Some people don't even have a need to achieve. And if they don't, it doesn't stand in the way of them living a good life.

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RSDTyler

There are two ways one ends up without aspirations.

1) I'm so happy that I don't need anything else. My life is perfect. One understands that happiness is a reflection of whats on the inside and not whats around them. So changing the outside circumstance can only bring momentary happiness. True root happiness is complete reflection on your perception of yourself, your life, and what you have. There is a cool documentary called "Happy". I've never watched it all the way through, but the concept is similar to what I'm explaining here. They take millionaires multiple times over, middle class people, poor people, and even travel to third world countries and monitor the happiness of kids that only eat once every other day. And you'll find across the world that BIG aspirations isn't something that everyone has. Every isn't afforded the luxury to DREAM, some people aspire to be able to eat 2 meals a day in the future. Thats what their life afford them.

I can tell you from my personally life.. Prior to 2 years ago, I had always been some what stocky. Slightly over weight, but I never cared to lose weight because it wasn't stopping me from doing anything. I still had the girls, I was cool, I had great friends, but more importantly, when i looked at myself I saw my self as the most attractive man on the planet. I just didn't care. I had NO aspiration to lose weight. No because i enjoyed because stocky, but because I loved myself too much to see that I needed to change something.

Fast forward 2 years ago.. I had "accidentally" lost 30 pounds and I didn't even know. I spent two months wondering why my clothes were fitting different. People would tell me I lost weight, but it never clicked. I just figured it was 3-5 pounds or something. After two months I ended up on a scale at a house party saw my weight and then figured out why my clothes were so loose. Looking at myself always resulted in me seeing the same thing. Its like the anorexic thing. NO matter what they are, they see wha they see. And their happiness with their body is a reflection of what their MIND tells their eyes to see. It has nothing to actually do with whats there.

2) Then there is the guy who is so unhappy that he doesn't see how dreaming to do anything would make a difference. Regardless of what he has, he's still going to be this and that. He figures whats the point.

I will tell you though that a man that eats a poor diet has a poor perception. We are what we eat literary. You eat garbage, you become garbage. You think garbage, you talk garbage, and act garbage. I don't know you, but I'm willing to bet you could make a couple corrections here that could change how you SEE things.

Thats really the only thing thats relevant. Its all about how you SEE it. How you SEE yourself.

Everyone is not going to change the world, some people are just going to work decent jobs and do the family thing. That's okay. You just have to own it. Admit it, accept it, and be willing to express it. You don't have to have aspirations.

Some will lead, some will follow, and some will play the sidelies. So whatever you choose is okay. But it is same to safe that you aspire to be better with women. You wouldn't be here if you didn't.

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