Hey guys,

I have a quick question on how to present yourself as a 'non-boyfriend material', and rather 'hookup-only material'.

The think is that this month only I received 3 texts from 3 different girls with the more or less same content:

"I think I am getting used to you and we should stop seeing each other. I know you don't want any commitments and I need a real relationship. I hope you understand"

I have had sex with all of those girls, however also made them aware that I am not looking for anything serious.
After 2-3 hookups with each of them, I received those messages.

So how do I keep those girls with me for more hookups without wanting them to be in a relationship?

You don't. If you conveyed your position clearly from the beginning, they knew what the deal was. You reply something to the effect of:

"No worries, I'm sorry I'm just not in a place where a relationship is the right thing for me. If you want to hang out again some time, let me know."

This effectively tells them - no problem. I'm available to be your booty call.

Was the sex any good?

I've only had encounters like this that early on if the sex simply just wasn't any good. And even then they usually fight and argue a bit before walking off.

And what do you do when they say this?

Usually a girl is just looking for some emotional support, so after a text like this, if you were to pick up the phone and call them. Asking them "So whats up" - Explain your position, and assure them that you still care for them (if you do) and you'll have an extension before they bring this up again.

It all boils down to you not connecting with them emotionally. I'd say 80% of a woman problems boils down to them just not feeling loved. Almost everything they complain to you about if its stripped down to the root will be a result of them not feeling loved. But I would advise just letting them go if you have no real emotional connection with them.

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Was the sex any good?

I think it was. 2 of them were really satisfied, other one didn't complain.
And what do you do when they say this?

Well, here's what I consider my lack of emotional connection.

When one of the girls wrote that we should stop seeing each other as she demands much more attention that she receives, I did not pick up the phone as you suggested, but simply agreed.

I wrote something like "If that's what you think, I can only respect this. You may be right, I my not be able to give you what you want".

She replied with "OK, and please don't write again". And that's that.

Same with other girls. I always agreed, and let go, so I think there really was no emotional connection.
But as the time goes by it makes you think whether you really made the right decision. I think those doubts will be gone with time.

The question is what to do to avoid those messages and just to have fun with one another.

Women are always looking for your leadership. They are looking for you to validate their emotional decisions before they can settle themselves on them.

My girl would get emotionally at times and try to break up with me and you know what I said? ... " No." - She'd go " What do you mean no" ..I'm like " We're not breaking up, you're in your emotions. Go cool off and we'll talk a little later"

Girls in the past.. I'd ask " Why ? " or girls that I said " fine okay " - all left, because I validated their decisions.

A girl in your life can not make a decision with getting your emotional approval. If you get emotional by their objections, they'll feel like there must have been a reason for them to feel the way they did because it made you so emotional. When you're unemotional and just respond with love. They'll begin to question themselves.. They'll question whether or not their reasons were actually valid because you didn't even get emotional about it or agree to it. And a woman is almost always following the lead of her man. Now if you hand her leadership through your emotional response she'll take it, but so long as you remain neutral and state what you think is best they will trust your judgment over their own.

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My biggest strength is my heart. I present myself as bad boy but I make sure to still be a good person. I've had this happen to me a couple of times. I just reassured them I cared about them as a person and provided them with good emotions. Girls associate you with emotions. Now, this is my thing, I display relationship qualities even if it's a booty call or a fling. I don't do it on purpose but I understand that the girl shouldn't feel bad after sleeping with me. So if that means cuddling a little after sex and just talking for a bit, so be it.

Emotional connection is huge. Lately, I have made myself more vulnerable by sharing more about myself. It's helped my game.

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I guess I have the exact same attitude. The question is if you assured them that you care about them, was there any continuation? Hanging out, talking, booty calls etc?

In my case they just asked not to contact them (it's been a week now) and normally I would say fine and do nothing...

Oh yeah, they understand that I am not ready to settle down yet. Doesn't mean they don't try. They still talk to me and some of them do continue to see me after. Some don't, and go on dates with guys that do not give them the same experience and guess what, they come back. Just be ready for some to not come back at all.

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