hard time finding a girl that does it for me



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PostPosted: Fri Sep 13, 2013 6:52 pm 
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Hey guys got a question I wanna run by you because I'm sure others have been in this boat before. I broke up with ex quite a while ago I really liked her so I took it kinda hard, but I bounced back and got out there again met other hot girls went out with other girls. Thing is I've gone out with a lot of hot girls, but none of them ever materialize because since my ex I'm having a hard time finding another girl that really does it for me. I was just wondering how other ppl that have been in this situation before have done to get past it. Thanks


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PostPosted: Fri Sep 13, 2013 6:54 pm 
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Quote:
Hey guys got a question I wanna run by you because I'm sure others have been in this boat before. I broke up with ex quite a while ago I really liked her so I took it kinda hard, but I bounced back and got out there again met other hot girls went out with other girls. Thing is I've gone out with a lot of hot girls, but none of them ever materialize because since my ex I'm having a hard time finding another girl that really does it for me. I was just wondering how other ppl that have been in this situation before have done to get past it. Thanks
Have patience. Date/have sex with as many girls as you can. And just date them for AT LEAST 3-4 months, that's when u will really realize if she's good for you. Otherwise, It's just a matter of time .

Wallie

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PostPosted: Sat Sep 14, 2013 2:46 pm 
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I'm currently in the same boat except it's hitting me much harder.

Broke up with the gf, got back into PU, had a few dates, a few women I met, some randomers, numbers, etc., etc. After a couple of weeks of that it came crashing down. Started feeling the need to be in a relationship, looked to most women as nothing special and not worth approaching and then if I did see someone i'd oneitise her and fail to approach. Found myself getting needy and thinking about my ex.

I put it down to just being used to a relationship and the perks of a relationship. Makes you feel lonely. I'm just focusing on the negatives of the relationship. Seems to be working.


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PostPosted: Sat Sep 14, 2013 7:57 pm 
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A great way to overcome this is to look at something ELSE other than the result.

What I mean with this is that you want a relationship badly, or at least a girl who is relationship material. And therefore your game is crashing down. What you can do is try to get something that'll push you even harder, that will make you feel even better than when you were in a relationship.

Tyler Durden talks about this really well and his spin on it is quite good. "Cherishing" a girl, meaning being with her and loving to spend time with her, is beautiful, but it's not the end all be all. It's a bonus, a result out of all the hard work you put into bettering yourself and your life. It's a form of "lower consciousness" per se, because you're not actively doing anything but still feel good, rather great!

There is another type of good feeling though, one that lasts much longer, and it's the same feeling you get after a long hard day of work, work you know will benefit you in some way. Pickup is one of those things. There is no doubt pickup will improve who you are, because it is building a skillset (which is always difficult) at becoming good with women! So directly by getting really good at this skillset you get good with women - it's one of the fastest ways to get a lot of girls (instead of building a skillset like the guitar where you then are in a band, which indirectly gets you chicks). Here you directly get chicks through a skillset.

Pushing yourself in a skillset is what you should be looking for here. NOT the relationship, NOT the sex. These will come naturally. Aim to get really good at this skillset. A really good way to realize just how good you feel at building this skillset is to set challenges for yourself that scare you. That push you out of your comfort zone. Then once you do it, you have gained experience and also expanded your comfort zone, thus becoming better at this whole thing. Keep doing it again and again, always something that scares you so that you become great in any situation.

Try this - tomorrow or the next day set yourself a challenge, one that you fear, directly related to pickup. Don't care what it is, anything that scares you that you see gaining some sort of benefit from FOR YOURSELF. For example - "Today I want to practice approaching" or "Today I want to practice talking complete bullshit to get out of my head" or "Today I want to practice touching" or "Today I want to practice appraoching a large set" something like that.

Once you actually do it, you know you have just gained something from this, and since you feared it, the feeling will be amazing. You will feel like the MAN. Do this every day and you build momentum. You will start to feel good and things will come as they come. But focus on this.


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PostPosted: Sun Sep 15, 2013 9:30 pm 
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Joined: Wed May 29, 2013 3:08 am
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Quote:
A great way to overcome this is to look at something ELSE other than the result.

What I mean with this is that you want a relationship badly, or at least a girl who is relationship material. And therefore your game is crashing down. What you can do is try to get something that'll push you even harder, that will make you feel even better than when you were in a relationship.

Tyler Durden talks about this really well and his spin on it is quite good. "Cherishing" a girl, meaning being with her and loving to spend time with her, is beautiful, but it's not the end all be all. It's a bonus, a result out of all the hard work you put into bettering yourself and your life. It's a form of "lower consciousness" per se, because you're not actively doing anything but still feel good, rather great!

There is another type of good feeling though, one that lasts much longer, and it's the same feeling you get after a long hard day of work, work you know will benefit you in some way. Pickup is one of those things. There is no doubt pickup will improve who you are, because it is building a skillset (which is always difficult) at becoming good with women! So directly by getting really good at this skillset you get good with women - it's one of the fastest ways to get a lot of girls (instead of building a skillset like the guitar where you then are in a band, which indirectly gets you chicks). Here you directly get chicks through a skillset.

Pushing yourself in a skillset is what you should be looking for here. NOT the relationship, NOT the sex. These will come naturally. Aim to get really good at this skillset. A really good way to realize just how good you feel at building this skillset is to set challenges for yourself that scare you. That push you out of your comfort zone. Then once you do it, you have gained experience and also expanded your comfort zone, thus becoming better at this whole thing. Keep doing it again and again, always something that scares you so that you become great in any situation.

Try this - tomorrow or the next day set yourself a challenge, one that you fear, directly related to pickup. Don't care what it is, anything that scares you that you see gaining some sort of benefit from FOR YOURSELF. For example - "Today I want to practice approaching" or "Today I want to practice talking complete bullshit to get out of my head" or "Today I want to practice touching" or "Today I want to practice appraoching a large set" something like that.

Once you actually do it, you know you have just gained something from this, and since you feared it, the feeling will be amazing. You will feel like the MAN. Do this every day and you build momentum. You will start to feel good and things will come as they come. But focus on this.

Thanks a lot for the advice! Ya you're totally right I usually try and push myself out of my comfort zone, and I've met a lot of girls by doing so. I just haven't met one that really does it for me yet. Just gotta keep at it though.


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