Hi.. I'm a former AFC who's new to the PUA ways.. but am seriously trying to apply them in my life..

I found an old school friend of mine on facebook. She was a year senior to me in school, and after it we didn't meet for around 10 years. In school, we had flirted around a bit... but that's really old times and I don't think they are very relevant now. But she did have the hots for me then, even though we had separate LTRs.

Anyways, so I chatted with her for a while on gtalk, and then on the phone. We're both book lovers so we had some stuff to talk about in common. Then last Sunday i txted her about a book fair in the city and "why don't u join me there one of these days? It'll be fun." She said she's not free on any weekday, so we decided to meet up next saturday (all this on txt msgs only).

I didn't do anything for the next 2-3 days. Wednesday night I called her, she didn't pick up. Tonight (Thursday night) she picked up and talked very nicely, but the content was very confusing..

1- She went to the fair today with friends, "just to see what kind of books they have" and decided on some books she's gonna buy "on our saturday visit". I felt good that the saturday visit is on, even though she apparently lied to me about not being free on weekdays.

2- After about 5 minutes, i asked her "so what time do I see you at the fair grounds on saturday?". She says "Actually I'm planning to come there with lots of my friends, so I'll let you know on friday evening. But we will definitely meet". I said fine, do that.

What do you guys think she's trying to do. Avoid being on a one-to-one date with me by getting more people? Avoid it altogether? How should I respond to this - go and see what happens and who she brings, go to the fair but see her only for like 15 minutes, or not go at all?

I don't even know if the friends she mentions are only girls or boys too, and if there are other boys involved I just don't wanna go. I don't wanna get into all the AMOGing business, plus I'm kinda shy with new people so I don't know how it'll turn up.

Of course, there's also a chance that she will come up with an excuse for not coming altogether. In that case, how should I take it further?

There's no case of one-itis here, I'm working on many others. But I just wanna act in a way that gives me maximum benifit possible with this one.

Thanks in anticipation and sorry for the long post..
Attraxion.

AMOGing is something you're gonna have to get used to.

Go, take a girl or more with you, and have fun. If you see her fine, if not fine. Don't even worry about her being there. You're focusing on her way too much already.

But do go, and take other girl(s) with you.

Hey, thanks for the reply.. I agree, I seem to be focusing on her too much..

Anyways, I have an update - she did not call, and I obviously didn't call again.. so tomorrow's date is off.. Seems she didnt wanna go out with me, but couldn't say no and chose this roundabout way of flaking out..

Okay now, is there hope of taking it any further with her, or should I just let go totally? As in, should I try once more after 2-3 weeks?

Thanks, Tripp, for the swell "PUA service" we got here..

Attraxion.

YOU let go. YOU pick up other girls. If SHE contacts you, YOU already be involved with other girls.

Nothing else will ever make a different at this point. YOU need to have options. YOU need to not need her. Those are the things that will change her mind about you in the future.

It should never be confusing if she is interested.

Personally, I believe there is an Attraction Scale for every person, and the more it tips in your favor for that person the less confusing it should be when you initiate plans for a Day 2 (or any date for that matter). They will usually agree to just about anything you have in mind for the next meet, and if they can't make it they will take initiative and reschedule---or ask you to do so for them.

So here's the 10 point Attraction Scale, with 5 being neutral/LJBF area:

1-------------------------10

From what you described I'd say you are here on her scale:

1-------|-----------------10

Forget her and game other girls, this time with more experience under your belt.

_________________
afc-challenge-to-the-masters-social-anx ... 10108.html

Thanks for your advice, Tripp and Roads..

Update - She didn't call me on friday night to finalize our plans, so I made other plans for saturday. Then she txted me on saturday morning "Would be going to the book fair around lunch time. Hope to see you there".

I responded after a while with "Hey, won't make it today, something's come up. You have fun, and tell me what books you got. See you some other time.. bbye"

This was a neg, i think, but later I got the idea that should have negged her with CnF, something like "You need to catch me early, babe. Calling me on Friday would have been good, now I'm already busy with other female fans ". Would that have been better?

Can you suggest a beautifully worded (as in PUA beautiful ) txt for such a situation?

Actually, Tripp, i'm not cool with AMOGing right now because I have some inner game issues I am working on (overweight), that will take some time to get me back in confidence.

Ok, first of all, the text you sent was just fine. That alone will get her to at least start thinking what you're wanting her to think. If you see her again, act normal. You had a good time, and she missed it.

As far as your weight issue . . . Joe Doyle is overweight as well, and does very well with the girls. In fact, he's now an instructor at Mystery's company. Your weight issue is ONLY in your mind. Don't wait until you're "fit" to build your self-esteem up. Sure, go ahead and get fit, but in the meantime, build your self-confidence w/o the GQ body.

Hey Attraxion - I had a big problem with flakiness before I starting learning PUA techniques. I found that "flakiness" is not really a quality of women but an IOD. It means you haven't built enough attraxion or comfort prior to setting up a meeting. A girl will not meet with you because she is obligated, only because she wants to.

It's best to build more attraction before going to planning stuff over the phone, but I've been a lot more successful lately by bulding comfort and attraction over the phone: don't just call her and say "let's go to the book show." Call her up and be in a great mood, talkative, joking around. Make fun of her for things she says and always be the first one to have to go. As far as arranging a meeting, keep her waiting a bit, and be very casual - "My friends and I are going to the book fair, maybe we can catch up there." I had a girl meet me and my friends at a bar. Total DHV for me with all my friends around, and I let her be a bit uncomfortable at first before finding a private spot with her in the corner to "save" her. She took me home for the night and then wouldn't stop calling. And I NEVER had to stress over whether she would show caus eI was with my buds.