Friend zoned then she texts me a month after no contact



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PostPosted: Thu Sep 06, 2012 7:40 pm 
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So unless you didn't read my thread on the fact I got friend zoned quick background story:

-Met online

-Went on 4 dates all went really well. Great convo (2 of the dates were 12 hours long and no silence whatsoever). Plenty of kino (could have ramped it up a bit more I guess)

-Kissed on dates 3 & 4. She was receptive and reinitiated the kiss when I went in for it on date 3.

- She started getting distant though between dates 3 and 4. Less texting etc.

- Didn't text me after date 4. I left it a few days then text her. She replied saying she had fun on our dates but doesn't think there's anything more there than friendship.

Now I get a lot of guest lists to gigs from my career so I'd previously invited her to a show at the end of last month to see a band we both love. After she friend zoned me I said that's cool and the free tickets still stand if you want them. She said she'd love to come. The day came and went (I weren't thinking about her any more and invited someone else anyway). I've basically not heard from her for over a month since she friend zoned me.

I was a little hung up on her, invested too much and became a little AFC when I read those 'freind zone' words. I'm over that now and not even sure how I feel about her anymore. I definitely don't like her as much as I did. But anyway she texts me today "Hey devi4nt, how are you hun, not heard from you in ages I miss hanging out. How's your arm doing x"

Not sure how she knows about my arm, Must have stalked my facebook to see me comment on a post to a friend about busting it up the other week. Normally when a girl friend zones you it doesn't actually mean you will still be friends right? Well it never has for me anyway. Normally I will never see that person ever again once I have been friend zoned. It's usually their polite way of saying fuck off :lol:

How should I play this one? She text this afternoon around 12pm. It's now 8.30pm at night I haven't replied yet. I kind of want her to think I don't care about her no more and I want her to invest in me. Shall I reply and pretend I deleted her number 'Who's this?'. She still signs on to the dating site we met on. I deleted my account but check it from time to time to see if anyone's signed up worth re joining to message and she's always online. So I'm thinking she's getting fed up of looking and realising I was great. Maybe I'm looking in to it too much but I've never had a girl who friend zoned me get in touch afterwards before. I kind of wouldn't mind seeing how it plays out as she is still really hot. any advice on how to play it? Should I wait a few days to reply and say DHV with something that was keeping me crazy busy?

Thanks for any advice.


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PostPosted: Thu Sep 06, 2012 7:44 pm 
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I would wait a day or two and reply "Hey hun. All is good. Life is keeping me busy. Lots on my plate. How about you?"
and see what happens.

I am not sure she has had some cosmic realization, but is probably willing to reconsider your application to ride her pussy. Maybe she has had a few bad dates, has been fucked then nexted, ...
Or maybe she simply wants some more validation that she is hot. Worth a shot anyways.

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PostPosted: Thu Sep 06, 2012 7:54 pm 
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A "who's this" would do the trick. And once she tells you who she is, tease her.

As for friendzoning, the problem was that you didn't escalate fast enough. 4th day and you only went as far as kissing. Next time, aim to f-close as soon as 2nd day.

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PostPosted: Thu Sep 06, 2012 8:02 pm 
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Yeah you didn't escalate so she lost sexual attraction. Frame the reason you didn't escalate as you thought she was too much of a "good girl" and you actually had to work hard at not dragging her into bed. Then the blame is on her, your credentials are reinstated as a real man :P


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PostPosted: Thu Sep 06, 2012 9:12 pm 
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Quote:
A "who's this" would do the trick.

i like this idea.


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PostPosted: Thu Sep 06, 2012 9:58 pm 
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a girl that you really like can mess with your head one moment she likes you and your on top of the world then she doesnt txt you back and your depressed again ive been in a similar situation my advise is to move on keep gaming other girls and just keep her in the back of your head, let her be your back up plan or a way to build your confidence while talking to other girls and if she did have some sort of realization the run wit it homie! good luck


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PostPosted: Thu Sep 06, 2012 10:29 pm 
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Joined: Sun Aug 14, 2011 10:22 am
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Quote:
A "who's this" would do the trick. And once she tells you who she is, tease her.

As for friendzoning, the problem was that you didn't escalate fast enough. 4th day and you only went as far as kissing. Next time, aim to f-close as soon as 2nd day.
This. Same happened to me. Went on a date, kissed a girl. Doesn't want to see me again. Delete her number. 2 weeks later a random "Hey how are you. Let's talk."

We are now fucking :D


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PostPosted: Fri Sep 07, 2012 8:03 am 
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Quote:
How should I play this one?
get her out and pay attention to what she does, if she's reciprocating a kiss and wants more, have sex with her or she's going to get bored, put yourself in her shoes, lets say she has 100 guys hitting her up for dates online, she picks you cause she finds you attractive and you don't seem creepy, she wants to get laid, so she goes out with you, date 1 goes good but no kiss, oh well, shrug it off maybe it will happen next date, date 2 goes ok, but still no kiss, wtf is this? how will I get laid at this rate?, oh well one more chance, 3rd date, oh way better he kissed me but I still didn't get laid :(, 4th date, goes out, ok... still didn't fuck me, screw this, got 100 other guys that will smash that for me, this guy probably just wants to be friends

Quote:
She text this afternoon around 12pm. It's now 8.30pm at night I haven't replied yet. I kind of want her to think I don't care about her no more and I want her to invest in me. Shall I reply and pretend I deleted her number 'Who's this?'. She still signs on to the dating site we met on. I deleted my account but check it from time to time to see if anyone's signed up worth re joining to message and she's always online. So I'm thinking she's getting fed up of looking and realising I was great. Maybe I'm looking in to it too much but I've never had a girl who friend zoned me get in touch afterwards before. I kind of wouldn't mind seeing how it plays out as she is still really hot. any advice on how to play it? Should I wait a few days to reply and say DHV with something that was keeping me crazy busy?
see what she's on about and what this is all about, don't be too quick to just give up your goods so to speak, let her actually show that she will work for it a bit first, if not why just put your balls on a silver platter for her after she blew you off

waiting a few days is kind of weird, realistically does anyone not see their text messages for days?, really?

''who's this?'' is fine, and just be normal like you were before, don't pretend like you don't know her or anything, just be the same as you were before, just let her talk herself into seeing you again, really don't try hard at all, she blew you off, so she had her chance, if she's not even willing to invest into wanting to see you or catch up again, then why would you work hard for her?, that doesn't mean be rude to her, or butthurt, or anything, just don't ask her out or anything or put effort into it unless you are getting some sort of indication on her end that her interest level is up, if it is, take her out on another date, frame it that way (not a friendly friend meetup) and if she can't invest in that, then who cares about her, your life has moved on

if you get her out on the date, just actually go for the kill, no more of this TRALLALALA 8TH DATE AND WE HAD A COOL INTERESTING CONVO ABOUT MUSIC AND I TOUCHED HER ON THE SHOULDER TWICE type stuff, set the mood, make the logistics available for sex, and when the offer has been taken up on, make it happen, turn her on, break out the D


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