Is this a shit test?



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 Post subject: Is this a shit test?
PostPosted: Thu Aug 09, 2012 12:48 am 
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Is this a shit test? (via text message)

Me: just got through running and tanning. Come over and watch a movie with me tonight.

Her: only if we do Starbucks first!


I'm thinking of replying: "if your buying." or something like that.

We just got back from a weekend at the lake together so she may be seeing what she can get away with. However just as I'm writing this she sent a smiley to follow.

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PostPosted: Thu Aug 09, 2012 12:53 am 
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No. She's asking if the two of you can go to Starbucks.


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PostPosted: Thu Aug 09, 2012 12:54 am 
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Just an idea..

"You're going to bring me starbucks?! How sweet.."


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PostPosted: Thu Aug 09, 2012 1:17 am 
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I didn't think so but it almost sounded like that us hanging out was contingent on me doing what she dictated. Lol

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Aug 09, 2012 1:32 am 
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Nah dude.. Just sounds like she wants to drink starbucks with you. :)


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Aug 09, 2012 1:35 am 
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I think it is indeed a shit test.
She is trying to reframe the whole interaction by having you buy into her frame that you need to reward her to interact with her. It is clear that she wants you to qualify to her. If you comply, you will very clearly be friendzoned and become just another beta orbiter.
The attitude in this interaction is clearly that she is the prize.

You need to defuse this shit test, reassert your alphaness, and be sure to make it clear that YOU and not HER are the prize.
be ready to walk away if the situation so demands.

Over-analyzing: you're doing it great man :wink:

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PostPosted: Thu Aug 09, 2012 1:51 am 
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You can't just analyse everything a girl ever tells you.. She is just being sassy! It's not like she is controlling the whole frame or something! You can answer that by many ways.. You can say: " Good idea! I would love a caramel latte right now!"
Keep things simple and don't complicate it for yourself mate.. Good luck

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PostPosted: Thu Aug 09, 2012 2:43 am 
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she wants to spend more time with you...


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PostPosted: Thu Aug 09, 2012 3:08 am 
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"Sounds good. Round's on you! :D"

And also what KimPa said.


Last edited by Tr@veler on Thu Aug 09, 2012 3:11 am, edited 1 time in total.

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PostPosted: Thu Aug 09, 2012 3:09 am 
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I have to side with the guys saying it isn't. She just seems to want Starbucks, I mean come on who doesn't? Their shit is awesome!

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Aug 09, 2012 3:15 am 
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Quote:
I mean come on who doesn't? Their shit is awesome!
I hate Starbucks. Their shit it shit.
With that said, it's not a shit test. Should not be treated as such.

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Aug 09, 2012 3:30 am 
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"Sure. Only if you beat me at pillow fight first ;)"

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PostPosted: Thu Aug 09, 2012 9:21 am 
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You invited her straight to your bed, her anti slut kicked in, she wants a diverted long route to your bed, she is def interested.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Aug 09, 2012 10:28 am 
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She likes you. It's simple.

Agree with her. Go and get a quick coffee then kino and tease her a bit.

At your place same thing but escalate fast.


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PostPosted: Thu Aug 09, 2012 4:18 pm 
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What if it is? Do you try to out alpha her with some bullshit "NO I AM THE MAN SO WHAT I SAY GOES. IN FACT YOU MUST PAY FOR THE DVD."

What if it isn't a shit test and she actually thinks grabbing a coffee and talking to you face to face might be nice?

Here's the secret to all this alpha bullshit out there: being "alpha" for a human being means not giving a shit. You're not a werewolf. You don't bowdown to a damn packmaster. Human beings do their own thing, and the ones who are the most powerful are the ones who do what they feel like, don't act like idiots, and don't apologize for it.

At first you have to fake it, which means yes, you might have to start an entire forum post about a single text from a girl in order to figure out how to look like you don't give a fuck. "Sure, as long as you're buying."

But eventually you get to a point where it doesn't matter. Where you realize that there's plenty of middle ground between giving into her every demand, versus trying to "win" every interaction.


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