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although I'm not wealthy, Im a commercial pilot and musician, I'm a published photographer and underwater videographer, I ride motorcycles and generally have a lot of the lifestyle/life purpose things developing.
All of this is irrelevant, the only relevance it has is to show your lack of self confidence. ( It didn't even need to be part of this question)
It is my opinion that you are just giving yourself false confidence, you are putting emphasis on your achievements rather then your own self perception. True confidence is a powerful self belief, a belief so strong that it cannot be rattled. A man with an abundance of confidence, is a man that is the same no matter what. Whether he just got out of prison just claimed bankruptcy or is a millionaire. Its believing that no matter what goes wrong, you still have yourself to count on. You have to believe any woman that rejects you is clearly insane and missing out.
The thing about real confidence is that it cannot be faked. It is only observed by the unconscious and therefor a simple truth.
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I was told my style/dress sense is great, body language good and have the potential to be great with women.
Did you believe it? truly?
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However, clearly there is some fundamental things lacking because I seem to be attracting only 5's and 6's- (to the extreme, ie offers of 3-somes etc) and yet very cute/beautiful women still elude me. I can't even seem to connect and be friends with those kind of groups of people- which I'd assume is a good starting point
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Here in lays the answer you seek.
Confidence is what you are lacking, this is your avenue to achieving this confidence. These women the 5's & 6's, they are WOMEN! Because you already view them as below your standards, you have a form of self confidence among them. This is where you need to practice, you need to become use to the feeling of solid self confidence. If you believe you can obtain these women easily then this is what you should be doing.
Here's the thing! Women that are 5's and 6's will act exactly the same as 9's and 10's in regards to reactions from men and seduction. They basically have the exact same mindset, just as us men do when it comes to women and seduction.
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Has anyone been in this position or has any suggestions what I might need to concentrate on and develop to start connecting with 8-10's and their groups. Because right now, as I see them around in house parties or bars, their whole psyche seems to be on a different level to mine, hard to describe.
Games the 5's and 6's until you can virtually make them wet from your presence alone.
You will be getting the experience in working withing a high level of self confidence. You will be learning what works on women ( 5-6-9-10 all the same)
Your own belief ( confidence) will rise, from abundance and practice, suddenly HB ratings are irrelevant, you will just see women as attractive or not, as conquests.
Once you see with blind eyes, the women will come to you.