| A note on nervous energy that I thought of recently. If it sounds like I'm getting all mystical on your ass, I am. But this is true, and thoroughly field tested.
People, especially girls, are good followers when they are in the presence of an alpha or a leader. In fact they are so good that they will emulate the emotional and subconscious beliefs of the leader by sensing it through the alpha's body language and speech. This is why when there is an emergency of some sort locally or nationally, people always immediately look to a leader to provide calm and reassurance.
So when you are in the set, you are talking and having a good time, running your routines and just generally being an interesting guy. Guess what...you've become the set's De facto alpha. If you are still a shy guy at your core, or if there's anxious energy trapped somewhere in you, your set will notice this. DO NOT fight this, DO NOT deny this part of yourself. The more you resist, the more friction and conflict you create within yourself.
Realize that the problem is not that there is nervous energy inside of you---everyone has this energy in themselves---but that the amount of nervous energy in you determines what social wavelength you are operating on. Too little of this energy and you come off as flat, uninteresting, boring. Too much of this energy and you come off as jumpy, anxious, scared. People want to be around others who are more or less on the same page as them, so it's important to calibrate this energy inside a set.
So don't resist it. Instead, embrace it, and let it work to your advantage. Attraction between two people only happens if there is tension between them. If you should have nervous energy in the pit of your stomach while you are talking to a pretty girl, she will sense it and in turn create this anxious energy in herself. She might become a little shy, blush, or mess up her words a little, her voice will change, and her body language will change too. THIS IS A GOOD THING. It's what you do after this that matters. This nervous energy will make her more attracted to you, but ironically at the same time it will also make her more uncomfortable around you.
So what do you do? You have the double edged sword of attraction with you and you're not sure how to use it. Here's how to progress:
1) Keep the conversation going. As long as it's interesting, and you are interested, the conversation will allow you to "sync" the set. What this means is that you synchronize the energy levels of every member in the set so you are all on the same wavelength. This is when the magic starts to happen, as they begin to feel a connection to you and you begin to feel like you belong in the set.
2) Laugh. Smile. Make a few jokes. Laughing and smiling releases endorphins and makes people feel good. It also temporarily relieves tension, so if you sense a girl in the set is getting too shy, make a joke and make her laugh. She will open up a lot more afterwards. If you feel the amount of anxious energy beginning to build up in you, release it physically---do a high five with her, or twirl her around spontaneously. But if you are paying attention and enjoying the conversation, you shouldn't have too much trouble with this as your attention is on the topic at hand and not on yourself.
3) If you are in the set for pickup, direct the nervous energy towards your target. How do you do this? Simple: you ignore her. So now you and the set are on the same page but she feels a little off balance. She's wondering why you're not giving her as much attention as her friends. In addition, she sees you being the alpha of the set and will be attracted. You've made good with her friends, they like you, they trust you. Now tell them you've been ignoring their pretty friend and isolate. I.e. Go show her the cube or do a palm read a few feet away. The important thing is to isolate. When in isolation, give her the attention you've been withholding. Make her laugh, make her smile, touch her, etc. etc. Now she will feel more comfortable around you, and your energy levels will "sync". You will sense her open up to you. Go for a close of your choice.
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