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I am having trouble in groups(sometimes 1 on 1) starting conversations, being in it, seeming more alpha, etc. I am fine with the body language, posture, etc but I cant get it with the conversation. I am not quiet when I talk but not too loud either. Some people who i hangout with are loud and dont shut up, so I cant really talk too loud without almost yelling. Any exercises that can help me think of more things to talk about/ be more involved in conversations in the group?
All of the points previously made about finding your own style and how talking isn't always necessary are valid, BUT... if you are alpha or leaning that way and the conversation that is happening is crap--and lets face it, how many conversations do we sit through about movies, or television, or what happened at work/school, blah, fucking, blah?--then the absolute best way to show social dominance, not to mention the best service you can do for humanity, it to change the damned subject.
In other words: If the reason you are not talking much is that the people you are with are talking about boring shit, then you either need to help them out by talking about something interesting, or find new people to hang out with.
So, what is interesting? That's up to you, but there are topics that almost everyone is interested in, and if the setting isn't one that is conducive to serious conversation, go for verbal games.
Personally, I like to talk about sex. This can be serious or fun.
Here's a scenario: I have a group of friends over, guys and girls, the guys are quiet or talking about some bullshit sports thing, who's in the playoff, or listening to the girls talk about whether or not Linda, a girl who isn't there, should dump her bf or not. Boring.
I get a drink, come back and sit down and turn to Amanda, the hottest of the three, and say, "So Amanda," in a tone of voice that draws everyone in, "besides me, which of the guys here would you sleep with?"
"Shut up!" Giggles, hands over mouths, etc. "I'm not telling you that."
"So you would sleep with one of them? Or does that mean you'd sleep with all of them?"
The trick is to be outrageous, to push people, to get them to take positions, say why or why not... but--once you get it started you don't have to hold center stage. You can throw it to the group... What do you guys think?
If someone is saying something interesting and is having a hard time being heard, intervene, help him or her out. "Wait a second, guys, John makes a good point..." "Come on people, Angie's trying to tell you about something cool and you all are dicking off, try listening..."
This will both score points with John/Angie and put you one up in group dynamics.
Suffering fools, even if they are your friends, is a waste of your life energy. Either help them to not be fools (boring) or get new friends.