Quote:
If she loses weight ( and weight alone) can you see yourself marrying the girl?
If the answer is no; then leave her.
There is and old expression that goes " A pimple turns into a dimple when you're in love"
This happens to all of us man; you're exciting about the girl at first and then a few months later you see them for what they really are. I've been down the road many times; there has beens time when I left the girl immediately and other times where I toughed it out until past the point where I couldn't take it anymore. And all in all, it just made me unhappy. I even started to believe that the problem was me.. I found myself always looking for imperfections so I wouldn't be disappointed in the long run.
The magazine/porn industry has a lot to do with this aswell; subconsciously we are programmed to seek out perfection in women. So when we begin to see things that aren't falling inline with the models/celebrities/porn stars we instantly begin to lose attraction.
But where do you draw the line?
I think that it is important to communicate to the girl that you would like her to get into better shape, because if you don't you are just forces yourself to be with her and that is selfish on so many levels. She'll gain a false perception of the relationship and the break up thats inevitable will only hurt more when its time.
I tell all my girls I need them to stay in shape so that I can continue to feel attraction for them. And they tell me that they need to always be a man, stand strong and not take their bullshit so they can still feel attraction for me. Its in the job description; and if you aren't completing the job description, you lose the job.
Great post.
I would like to add, after the 'honey moon' phase of a relationship, everyone starts to pick up flaws. I would argue looks only matter at first because you need to spend time with her after if you try for a relationship.
If you see no future, Eddie is absolutely right. But, from personal experience, finding a girl you click with is harder than finding a girl who is good looking and you want sex with.
She sounds like she has issues and you are sticking around for her benefit, not yours. Which is not the best thing for you.