I'm starting this field report journal as my own creation of peer pressure to progress in this.

As a backstory:

I was born half-deaf and wear hearing aids you can't really see until you really look (inside the ear canal)- after your first impression of me. I am a 26 year old virgin that has gotten over many larger issues and is now at the point of the normal AFC.

I am 5'7", normal to slightly overweight build, American of mostly German/Italian/English descent. I went to school for finance and work in Finance for a Fortune 500 company. I hope to start my own company.

My first entry will be a prologue of sorts- it takes place at a townie bar less than 100 yards from my house and full of mostly people that live and/or went to school in the area.

1/10/2015:

Very cold outside. 10 degrees F. I did not plan on going out, so my plan was to just have fun, not judge myself or anyone, and give value if successful (instead of scanning the room for value aka social sources of good emotions).

With this carefree and non-burdensome attitude, I started talking to quite a few people early that were connected/talking to people I know. Details are vague for me right now, but I felt pretty good to start the night.

A local buddy of mine sat down and I told him I was going to talk to this hot chick sitting by the pool table. her face was an 8.5, body an 8. I walked up and used an opening that came naturally and worked for me before-

"Hey, you know, you are almost as good looking as I am, I just had to come and say hi."

She smiled and we started talking about where we are and where we're from. She mentioned a boyfriend, and I've learned before not to flinch. I asked her what her boyfriend thought his favorite feature of her was, and she didn't know. I said, "I bet its your eyes". She smiled. We did the sophomoric age guessing game, and I guessed 24, she said 22.

She had a pierced stud right below her lip. i said "i actually think piercings take away from natural beauty, which is why I came up." She said "I like it, but i'm not wearing any makeup or anything, barely anything". I said "Good", while smirking flirt-like.

he said she was done with the bar that was right by her (a bar we both knew and is bigger than the one we were at), and I said "And you're not done with this one?" She said she kinda was.

She pointed out who her bf was, a really tall guy, otherwise not impressive. I said "I try to jump, but I can only get up to his neck"- she laughed. I said it was nice to meet her and left. I felt barely any AA at all, and realized a pre-set opener that you feel comfortable with helps that a lot. Like I said, the night started well. The scene was not very hopping and I left for the other bar within the same establishment.

I saw some people I knew, some girls I am attracted to that knew me, some guys I know but are not really friends with, that are just my taller more muscular, more social-proofed competition. It was when I stuck with the people I knew and recognized and those that recognized me that my night went sour. nothing big happened, but the familiarity I guessed caused me to fall back into my old value-taking scene-searching, reaction-based identity making patterns.

[edit: Many of these interactions with people I already know have backstories in themselves, with pre-established connections and attractions between people. One such of my competition was an aloof BMW salesman that had some sort of game- maybe push/pull body language that comes with his job, who knows.

He was good, and I think it was when the girls i knew were reacting to other guys more that I went back to my reaction-based value assessments. I started judging people and the normalcy of myself based on reactions again. From then i was getting my source of ego and emotions from others. Its not until this morning that I realize that these reactions are based on pre-forum me, and that that's why its better to seek out new women- no bad social history to make up for.]

I will add later when i am less intoxicated, but i ended up talking to strangers about my personal value, and how I was basically leaving the town in the dust and how the town was soon going to be nothing but a bad memory to me.

I wasn't going to go out anyways, so I ended up going for the known watering hole. a new place will help maybe, as I felt much better approaching someone I didn't know.

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I'm Rod Green from Marketing. Actually, I'm not. You're dreaming as of this very second.

Tonight in suburban South Jersey, I went to several places, trying to stay away from the usual bar. I wore an off-white cashmere sweater and nice blue jeans.

Bar 1: I started out at this bar thats trying to be a craft beer place but failing badly, and just retaining all the old people from when it was a regular bar. Needless to say, the only people in my age range were the bartenders.

Bar 2: Bar with a band, nice looking place. Talked to a couple of people around me, did not get any IOIs from girls around the bar at all. Not much to go by anyways.

Bar 3: Public country club that was close to closing for the night, I thought they were open later. Cute bartender, but still, she's the bartender.

Bar 4: A nice bar with mostly older people but some younger. I get to sit in a nice cougar's chair, and we initiate small talk. I notice the ring and then do a harsh "screening", implying that I would be interested in swinging. She denied.

Earlier, I noticed a small group of guys around this girl near my age, and they were either looking at me or the interesting pictures on the wall behind me. After I strike out with the closer cougar, I walk over and say the first thing in my head, approaching the group:

"i noticed you were all impressed with my sweater from across the bar, hows it going?" I said it in an amused manner. Th guys denied doing so and the girl stayed quiet, but smiled as if interested. I asked her to guess how much it was. She guessed, but the answer was zero. I explained where it came from etc. and began to ask her about herself, when one of the small guys with alto voices chimed up, put his hand around her and said "Well, I'm her boyfriend, so...", in a way that was obvious he was not her boyfriend.

So, without missing a beat, I asked him what he does to generate some rapport, he said "It doesnt matter", and he + his friend brought her away from me. She was slightly disappointed in a "thats ok" playful way, play-hitting the guy from behind as she followed him.

Bar 5: Went back to my usual bar, with some usual people and with some not so usual people. There was one girl there that looked like a stripper, but I knew her...she was usually in a group and I would just say hi because she had a boyfriend and I didnt feel there was a chance anyways. She was very talkative and social with me and many other guys...I suspect she broke up with her BF. Her friend didnt like me that much, but I think the stripper girl did.

It went well, but her friend was talking to her a million miles an hour, probably trying to cockblock. I negged the stripper girl herself for talking fast. She said her drink was mostly Red Bull, and I smiled and said "Is that why you're talking so fast?" she was smiling and said "What, Im a fast talkerrrr". Anyways, for some reason I didn't feel the confidence of being able to continue on, so I made myself scarce to "talk to my buddies". There was another guy she was talking to that claimed to be a doctor. I challenged him, and it became apparent he was lying. But they talked anyways...its like she knew and it didnt matter.

He didnt get her either. By the end of the night, she had made her way to the older mid-30s guy (looks like she likes older guys) and gave him the most undivided attention. Overall, my sticking point was not being able to continue and thinking she would get sick of me. I did light kino (which is big for me), but I didnt create opportunities for more.

Another girl that is engaged but goes out and is very open and sociable, and I ended up talking to her an her friends about a lot of real life non-PUA stuff....barely worth the sentence to portray the idea.

Still a virgin....

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I'm Rod Green from Marketing. Actually, I'm not. You're dreaming as of this very second.

Just give it time mate. The key when you just start off is to build confidence and get rid of AA.

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Previously Rugby7

My PUA Journey (2014): http://bit.ly/1yYjtSV
MY PUA Journey (2015): the-342-journal-vol-2-rugby7-vt187356.html
My Workout (Read this): http://bit.ly/1zIQncY

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