Met a girl in bar, not too sure where to go now...



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PostPosted: Wed Dec 05, 2012 2:06 pm 
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So I've been going to this local bar for sometime and seen her in there a few times before hand, before it's been too loud/busy to have a decent conversation, this time however we both ordered at the same time, she'd forgot her money...so I offered to get her the drink.

Then we sat down chatted for some time about general things, I got her another drink, from there we went to another bar around 1am sat (just me and her) for around an hour, still chatting about what kind of things we were into etc.

Offered to walk her home, when we got to her front door I went in for a kiss close, she said not at first, I said ok cool, kissed her on the cheek and walked away. Then she shouted "Don't feel bad" something I'm overthinking...

Any suggestions?


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PostPosted: Wed Dec 05, 2012 4:39 pm 
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A k-close should never be rejected. I'm thinking back over the years, and can't think of a single instance where I actually went to the door with the girl to try and get the good night kiss. That's like shit from the 80s bro. That's not how it's done anymore.

Even if the chemistry is going great, it becomes awkward once there is pressure to kiss each other at a specific moment, like before you say goodnight and go your separate ways. That's why you can't be an AFC and wait till the last minute! You need to go for the kiss before that. Besides, wouldn't you rather kiss her while the date is still going, then kiss her again a few minutes later, then maybe have a chance to keep escalating? If you wait until the very end it's doubtful she's going to start making out with you on her doorstep and invite you in to fuck.

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PostPosted: Wed Dec 05, 2012 5:33 pm 
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Thanks for the reply, I'm going more for a relationship at the moment, I'd like to add also I didn't number close either (at this moment anyone reading this is cringing) all I have is her Facebook, I'd like to rescue things...possibility?


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PostPosted: Wed Dec 05, 2012 6:35 pm 
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Website: http://www.nemweb.dk/en/pages/dubliexplanation
What I read I really liked it. Thank you for your information!

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PostPosted: Wed Dec 05, 2012 7:25 pm 
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Ninja is spot on here.

From what you wrote it seems like things were going well and she must have been in to you if she's going to another bar with just you. Yet you ended up with no number or kiss.

Getting a girls number in this situation is easy. Just say "we should hang out next week" or something to that effect, maybe something more specific than just "hanging out" but a hang out is low pressure so its good. (You're talking to her about what she likes so you can say you should do something she would find fun.) Then you'll have to get her number, how else are you going to organize it? It's pretty flawless dude, just don't be scared and just do it.

You also could kiss her before or after you got her number. If you want to do it and you think she would want to too just do it.

Nothing bad will come from a potential kiss-rejection. If you tried to kiss her one of the following will probably happen:

MOST LIKELY SCENARIO: You're making out with the girl.

BEST CASE SCENARIO: You're making out with the girl and the rest of your game is strong enough you can escalate to sex.

LESS LIKELY BUT NOT BAD SCENARIO: She IS in to you but she just was shocked and rejected you by accident, or maybe she just need more time. You'll be able to tell if it's one of these, she might tell you.

WORST CASE SCENARIO: She rejects you because she IS NOT in to you. (You now will not waste any more time with this girl)

IN EVERY SCENARIO: SHE GAINS ATTRACTION FOR YOU BECAUSE YOU ACTUALLY HAVE GUTS.


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PostPosted: Wed Dec 05, 2012 8:18 pm 
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That helped a lot thanks man. Final little question, next time I see her what would be the best approach/escalation to start with?

My main worry is to seem too clingy etc...


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PostPosted: Thu Dec 06, 2012 5:43 pm 
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Just be playful, touch her on the arm or lower back or something. Dance with her if its in a friendly environment for that. You should be able to tell if she is still in to it or not and if she is then just go for the kiss.


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PostPosted: Fri Dec 07, 2012 1:04 pm 
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You know how sometimes you'll be out and about and you'll stop and stand somewhere and talk for a minute and decide where to go or what to do? Next time that happens, lean back against a wall, all relaxed and casual. Maybe even bend your knee and put your foot against the wall. The key here is to look super relaxed and comfortable in your own skin and not be afraid to take up the space your in. If she 's like "Ok, let's go get some food first." Wait for her to start to walk away, then extend your arm and grab her and pull her back. Remain in your kicked back position. Then pull her in closer to you and seductively say "Where you goin', I'm not ready to leave yet." Try to envision this scenario and picture how your posture and attitude should be. This is such a confident and cocky way to show a woman that you are in control of her, and yet come across as cool and sexual.

She'll like that you grabbed her like that, because women like to be man handled and positioned by men. It'll also kind of snap her out of her current state of mind, because one minute she's thinking she's going to be walking somewhere, and now she realizes you don't give a fuck about that and your just standing there holding her arm and looking into her eyes. What you've done here is created a "moment." This is the time to kiss her. At that point, you look at her lips and say "Come here" and pull her in and kiss her.

Even if she turns away as you try to kiss her, just let her. She'll turn away, blush, then start to walk off. Then she'll look back at you. Remain in your laid back position and smile at her, then follow her and head off. Even if she rejects your kiss, you can still convey confidence and let that build the sexual tension. This will also let her know that you'll probably be trying to kiss her again later, and she'll be more receptive to it.

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PostPosted: Fri Dec 07, 2012 11:49 pm 
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Thanks a lot for the advice everyone.

Do you think a Facebook message would come across as needy? Or should I send one to DHV?


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