Reconciliation and how to behave



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PostPosted: Sun Dec 02, 2012 3:44 am 
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Hi guys, first time poster, long time lurker.

I've been reading about PU for a couple of years now - I don't consider myself a newbie to the game (I do quite well with women in general), but this situation has got my brain in a knot. This is essentially an issue of oneitis, but with a few more caveats, so if possible please refrain from the default GFTOW responses :) I'll attempt to cut a long story short.

My ex-girlfriend and I broke up around 2 months ago. Her ex-lover from Thailand who she hasn't seen in 2 years had contacted her on Facebook and she suddenly had major doubts about our relationship. Our relationship was very intense, very deep, and very connected.

In true AFC manner, thus ensued around 6 weeks of mental torture for myself, acts of desperation on my part, and mind games between the two of us, culminating in her slandering me online extensively and me feeling pretty damn shitty about myself. A few e-mails were exchanged where I attempted to take the moral high ground. We had a chat over the phone around 2 weeks ago about putting all this BS behind us and moving on with our lives, which made us both feel a lot better. Since then, we have been texting 3-4 times a week and have both agreed to try and be friends (at my suggestion). However, the mind games still continue. For example, I decided to protect my tweets because I had upcoming job interviews, to which she reacted by posting pictures of romantic postcards she had received from her ex-lover.

Despite this, we have agreed to meet in a few days for lunch/a few drinks as she is in my area for her dream job interview.

In all honesty, despite trying to put the whole experience behind me and learn from it as much as possible, I am still in love with her. If this interview goes well, and she gets her dream job, she will more than likely be moving from London to my area.

My question: how do I behave in this meeting? I know that I need to display higher value, make myself the prize and perform all the usual gambits in order to make myself attractive. Is there any other advice that you guys would offer? If a reconciliation of our relationship is possible, how do I behave in order to provoke it?

Thanks


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PostPosted: Sun Dec 02, 2012 5:02 pm 
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PostPosted: Sun Dec 02, 2012 6:29 pm 
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Actually, it sounds like she is a person you need out of your life, ignore her and stop talking to her.... Especially if she is fucking with your head this much. Screw trying to get her back she will just fuck with you more. Why on earth would you want to add constant mental fucks to your life?

Your obsession with her sounds pretty unhealthy to your own mental and emotional state, the only way to solve that is to eliminate her from your life. Just because you want her back doesn't mean she is the best thing for you, in fact in this case it sounds like it would be horrible for you.

Note: Don't be narcissistic, just because she does something doesn't mean it is in response to anything you do. Is she fucking with you or are you just in your own head? This is a common issue with a lot of guys on here they think every time a woman does something it is personal. Just because she posted that romance card doesn't mean it had shit to do with you.... If it did then you should certainly avoid this manipulative women who will make your life a living hell.

The other reason I would eliminate her from my life is she has ruined your confidence, you are insecure about everything in regards to her.... Get rid of her for yourself so you can get back to working on your self-confidence. Which reminds go buy a book or find a coach on self-confidence immediately and work on it.

Sorry but I won't give you advice on getting back with this girl because honestly I feel it would hurt you more in the long run.

Peace and Love,

Vic

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