I have attraction, now what?



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PostPosted: Tue Apr 24, 2012 1:59 am 
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Have a few girls with whom I'm currently texting, but seems like I'm stuck in very light attraction, like playful shit. My question is how do i transition to making a deep connection, without them being liek ' where is this shit coming from'. Oh yeah, i play the asshole, heavily during the intial interactions. And how do i get day 2's from girls who text me , intiate contact, and even ask me to hang out. But we just end up like keeping it so light and playful that its like we're both like 'wait is he/she serious, are we actually hanging out.'
And what do I say to actually get a day 2 once i feel like I've got enough comfort. P.s. im only 19 , the other girls are like 17 , 18, so parents and shit are involved, coffee seems boring, movies is too much, idk?
Alot of really advanced guys on here so thanks in advance, advice has been stellar since i joined last week lol.
Thanks


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PostPosted: Fri Apr 27, 2012 4:32 am 
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Shit man im on the same boat lol


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PostPosted: Fri Apr 27, 2012 5:27 am 
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Sounds like you're using MM/MB method roughly.

Image

If that is your method, work upwards.

As for how to go from c+f during attraction to deeper during comfort, just avoid coming across like a totally different person. Don't switch from 100% funny 0% deep overnight, make it gradual.

One way I do this personally is by mixing deep and funny elements of the same topic, so for example tell a funny story, give it a deep part, end it on a high note.

I hope that makes sense, ultra tired so that's potentially lacking clarity.


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PostPosted: Sun May 06, 2012 3:34 pm 
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i suck 2 at comfort building,its like building attraction is simple and if i feel and see the attraction is there,i wanna hook up,number close etc.knowing i need 2 shift 2 comfort building and once im in the comfort building phase the attraction slowly dies and i stay stuck in the comfort zone,so i think it works a bit like..build attraction,build comfort,build attraction,build comfort,build attraction,build comfort etc.u have 2 mix it and keep it balanced wich is the hard part


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PostPosted: Sun May 06, 2012 7:57 pm 
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Simplify your system. You're doing too much work.

Meet the girl. Get her number. Invite her on a date (NO fluff texting. NO pointless texting. MAKE THE DATE). Kiss close before the halfway mark on the date. Sex close by the end of the date. Go from there.

That's my system. Simple and direct. No possible miscommunication.

(As far as date ideas, there's a thread about that. A park works, play football and play-tackle her and transition into making out. A movie works.)


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PostPosted: Mon May 07, 2012 1:44 am 
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Quote:
Simplify your system. You're doing too much work.

Meet the girl. Get her number. Invite her on a date (NO fluff texting. NO pointless texting. MAKE THE DATE). Kiss close before the halfway mark on the date. Sex close by the end of the date. Go from there.

That's my system. Simple and direct. No possible miscommunication.

(As far as date ideas, there's a thread about that. A park works, play football and play-tackle her and transition into making out. A movie works.)
that needs more experience and confidence...

usually playfulness in texting is good. when a girl says something which could possibly piss you off, even as a joke, you could say, "oh I should totally give you spanking as punishment" and when you actually see her, slap her ass once see how she reacts, if she gets a little mad tell her that was the punishment. of course if she doesn't get mad or even if she playfully gets mad, it's another IOI


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PostPosted: Mon May 07, 2012 4:42 am 
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that needs more experience and confidence...
No it doesnt, have you ever tried it?

Besides, confidence comes from experience. Screw up on 2 dates and I guarantee you can get a kiss by the third girl.


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PostPosted: Mon May 07, 2012 7:40 pm 
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Increased compliance testing: Compliance tests are like the male versions of shit tests, small requests you make that she will, hopefully, adhere to. The idea rests on two principles. First, it’s easier to make a person agree to a larger request if they have already agreed to a smaller one (or series of smaller ones). This is the essence of increasing a girl’s investment in you, the more she does for you, the more attached she becomes to you. We are more likely to hold on to things we have invested in, whether that investment takes the form of time or emotions. Second, if she does something for you, her mind rationalizes that she must like you. Taking advantage of cognitive biases is the foundation for most sales and psychotherapy techniques, and applies equally enough to seduction.

So in the context of a pick-up, this might play out as:

1. “Can you hold this for me”
2. “Watch my stuff for a minute”
3. “Come to the bar next door”

And so forth. Each request is a bit heavier than the previous one, and presupposes a greater amount of rapport. You’ll notice also that beta game suitably takes the opposite approach, doing more and more for a girl which increases YOUR investment in her, but NOT her investment in you.



Distorting Rapport: Mystery’s method estimates that it takes about 6 hours of rapport to sleep with a girl, and on average, that’s probably correct. Unless you’re mingling with hookers pretty often, aim for 5-7 for each exchange. But if you think about, 6 hours isn’t a lot of time. His method relies on distorting rapport to increase the emotional depth of a relationship.

(a) Bounce: Change locations with her (makes her think she's spent more time with you than she actually has)
(b) Connect with her: Reframe what she says in her perspective to “connect” with her emotionally. (makes her think you "get" her)
(c) High-octane dates or conversation (dilates her emotional response to you)
(d) Breaking norms: Anything from making fun of another person together to breaking a law (hopefully a small one).
(e) Establishing anchors: Stimuli that illicit specific emotional responses (gets her to think about you)
(f) Giving her something: Scarf to dog tag, can be anything. Can’t be too cliché or you’ll come off as try-hard; needs to be the right amount of cliché. For instance, if it’s with a girl who isn’t that attracted to you, she’ll call you a loser for giving her your scarf. But do the same thing for a girl deeply attracted to you, and she’ll guard that scarf with her life. (same as above)
(g) Mirroring: Cherry pick words that she uses and/or slightly mirror her body language (while still maintaining the Alpha frame of yours. Gets her to reciprocate with you emotionally).




Physical escalation: First, a point of clarification. If a girl likes you, it doesn’t matter how stupid you sound or look when you’re trying to escalate. I was once palm reading a demon stripper in Zimbabwe, you think she would’ve refused because she knew what I was trying to do? Of course not, she only cared about my money. She wasn’t going to call me out to risk losing $5, that’s a lot of money down there. Similarly, a girl who likes you isn’t going to call you out for what you’re doing; she WANTS you to do it, she is looking to give you opportunities for it. That’s why stuff like palm reading and blatantly hackneyed approaches will always work. Stop thinking “what if she knows what I’m up to?” OFCOURSE she knows what you’re up to, women are far more intuitively trained in the crimson arts than men. It doesn't matter.

A girl who wants to fuck you will let you escalate. Remember that she WANTS you to escalate. ALWAYS ASSUME ATTRACTION

From what I can gather, escalation becomes fairly easy after a certain point. Once you break into intimacy, you’re pretty much on auto-pilot.

And always take 2 steps forward, 1 step backward. You can't make it too easy for a girl or you risk setting up too much of an LJBF climate. You'll want to occasionally BREAK RAPPORT (ignore her, neg her, etc) to explosively gain attraction. Push and pull at different times.

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My Blog: www.solvemygirlproblems.com


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PostPosted: Sat Nov 09, 2013 1:42 am 
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these are really good replies. I was a dark newbie at the time and didnt even thank you guys.


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