This is the first in a series of "Wolf Tips". Somebody asked me to do this in a previous thread so I thought I'd give it a shot. Hopefully you guys find some of this helpful. I'm starting with a post on screening, because it's the first step to getting into a drama free long-term relationship. Dating is a numbers game and you should play the game until you find the right type of girl. This post is all about finding the right type.

Freaks, Hoes and Good Girls

Hopefully this is a recap for most of you. The theory has been around the community for a long time. I personally have found it to be very helpful when dealing with women. The main idea is that different types of girls want different things from their relationships. Most girls fall easily into one of these three categories. Guys should be able to figure out what type they are dealing with and act accordingly.

Good Girls - Girls who are happy in relationships when their significant other is happy. These girls will tend to go out of their way to do nice things for their guys: cook, clean, give them gifts, play out their sexual fantasies, etc. They are the easiest type to maintain a long term relationship with because they make it fairly easy for the guy.

Freaks - Girls who are happy in relationships when they receive attention and strong emotional states. This is the type guys fall for the quickest, because they generally come off as very vulnerable. This type thrives on validation, both positive and negative. They cause a lot of drama, are more likely to cheat on you (sex is a form of validation), and usually have some form of daddy issues. These are also the type of women who tend to stay in abusive relationships. Guys, don’t get into serious relationships with these types of girls unless you really know what you’re doing. The way to make this work is for the guy to be able to inject a steady amount of drama into the relationship (or find some way to give her strong emotional states).

Hoes - Kind of self-explanatory. These girls are happiest when they are receiving material resources (money, gifts, etc) from guys. They are only interested in dating high-status guys or guys who show a willingness to buy them things. When you meet them, they will probably ask you about your job, what car you drive and/or where you live. They will relentlessly tool a guy over to get what they want. They’ll try to get you to pay for everything. The best way to have a long term relationship with a girl like this is to play the “pimp”. Don’t put up with any of that stuff.. Be clear that she’s going to have to pay for her crap if she wants any chance of seeing you. Be fine with her tooling over her orbiters or get her to tool over her orbiters for your benefit (I.e. send her up to the bar to get you free drinks from AFC‘s).

In conclusion, if you’re goal is an easy drama-free relationship, then stick to good girls. If you like a challenge and/or really know what you are doing, then try the other ones. However, you got to have great game to make it work with the other types. The freak’s petty drama and the ho’s attempts to tool you over for money are just forms of shit-tests. If you fail the shit tests, then these types will eat you alive (I learned this lesson the hard way, like most guys).

Low self-esteem vs. High self-esteem

Low self-esteem girls tend to sabotage their own relationships. They tend to assume other people think of them the same way they think about themselves. They tend to think you’re going to leave them eventually anyway so they will act out to test that theory. They do not make good long-term relationship candidates.

High drive vs. low drive

Don’t get into a long term relationship with somebody who has a lower sex drive than you do. It’s just not a good idea. Try to screen for people without sexual hang-ups. Personally, I would not consider a serious relationship with a girl who isn’t at least somewhat open-minded about sex. I also would not date somebody who would use sex as a bargaining chip.

RED FLAGS (I HAVE PERSONALLY ENCOUNTERED)

- History of drug abuse and or alcoholism
- history of poor decision making (like a long line of douche bag ex-boyfriends)
- seems to be in a constant state of crisis
- history of depression (un-medicated or not good at keeping up with the medication) or has a mother who’s mentally ill
- works as a stripper
- unwillingness to give and/or receive oral sex (I.e. has sexual hang-ups)
- history of past sexual abuse
- thinks masturbation is gross (opinions may vary on this one)
- Assumes you will pay for everything and/or disappears to the bathroom every time a check arrives.

EDIT: Some additions Richard Pryor listed, that I really liked:

- No friends
- Some form of obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD)
- Bad relationship with her parents, especially her father
- History of eating disorder (anorexia/bulimia)

I’m sure I can think of lot more if I tried. Be cautious when you see girls with these qualities.

In the future, when you ask a question on the forums about a particular situation, then it would help us if you let us know what kind of girl you are dating. For example, I am dating a high-drive, high self-esteem good girl. That should already tell you a lot about her personality. Incidentally, she’s pretty awesome and we don’t really ever have issues even after a year and four months.

EDIT 2: Further reading - Dogsoldier's fantastic post about Freaks, Hoes and Good Girls. The post focuses on how to spot the different types in a club scene and how to pick them up.

http://www.fastseduction.com/discussion ... 32&fid=173

-Wolf

This is good and I think there are more types than just hoes good girl and freak girl.

Probably, but I think there is some wisdom in keeping the theory basic. It's more or less a training tool and it covers most situations. I can count on one hand the number of girls I've met who didn't fall easily into one of these categories. They are out there, but they tend to be fewer and far between. Furthermore, some girls take time to show their true colors.. you may not know until you're actually in a relationship with them.

-Wolf

Good post Wolfwood.

Regarding red flags:

1. What do you do when you encounter a red flag? Proceed with caution or simply bail?

2. What do you mean by "history of depression (un-medicated or not good at keeping up with the medication) or has a mother who’s mentally ill". Does that mean that a woman who has had a history of depression, but taken the medicine is not a red flag?

From what I've experienced, depressed girls on medication are also a definite red flag.

WoW! That was really useful post. I caterogized my girlfriend in 2cnds and also few others I have had. Now I know a bit more how I should act so thanks for the post

@Richard - Red Flags indicate that you should use caution before entering into any kind of long term relationship with that person.

@TMG3 - Sure, use caution when you find out somebody has a history of depression. However, some forms of depression are 100% treatable with medication so keep that in mind as well. When I made the list, I was only drawing from my own experiences. The one girl I dated who had a history of depression AND took her medication regularly was just fine.

Well, you described my girlfriend of 24 allright.

My GF is:

Freak (She creates drama atleast once a month, she needs a lot of validation, has daddy issues)
Low self esteem
Low sex drive (I have a really high sex drive. I would like to have sex 2x a day if I could, but for us it's once every 3 weeks. And on top of that, I have taken upon myself to stop mastrubating (I think I was addicted), so it's even harder for me to sleep, concentrate, not feel anxious and very horny)

and as red flags:

- Depression
- Seems to be in constant state of crisis
- Unwillingless to RECEIVE oral sex

and if I take Richard Pryor's list from the other red flag topic, I have:

- Her body issues exceed normal limits. If she can't eat a meal without calculating calories, etc. (Well, she's a dietitian. Don't see it as strange for her in that regard)
- History of eating disorder.
- No friends at all
- She carries hand sanitizer in her purse. OCD
- Bad relationship with her parents, specially her father
- She is obsessed with her pet (not sure why this is bad)

And I'll add this one myself:

- She has no hobbies or activities (all she does is help out cleaning the house of her parents)

--

When I read all of this, it makes me wonder. I somehow still keep thinking that she will eventually change for the better. I have stopped trying to change her though. That's just too much energy spilled for me. But I've noticed that whenever I try to distance myself from her, she creates drama and I have to come to her and fix everything (by showing my validation off on her)

And the lack of sex... driving me nuts.

I'm a very patient person. I've been with her for a year now. I think most guys would already have runned away from her where they in my place. Why do I stay? Is it because it's my first relationship? Because I don't want to be alone? Why do I keep trying eventhough it probably takes years and years for her to let even ONE of these problems go?

I've just given her an expensive ring for our 1 year anniversairy. I keep investing in her. When I'm supposed to do homework, I instead look on these forums, read books how to have a better relationship, how to not have drama, to have better sex.... It's all I do for the past year.

It's not like there are no good times, we do have good times, and I live for those moments. But sometimes I feel like the negatives outweight the positives (that's how I feel right now).

TheArtArtist: you might want to start a thread because it seems your relationship is very unhealthy. I'll go ahead and offer my advice here.
Yes, it is strange. It is called obsessive compulsive disorder. Are you able to go out to restaurants with her or is she so anal about food that she doesn't eat food other than the one she cooks?
Ah, this explains it.
Your woman suffers from OCD. I don't think you should suggest she goes see a shrink, but there are pills for this. If it gets out of control (constantly washing hands, can't touch door knobs, etc) then it's a big problem.
Want to elaborate?
It's bad for two reasons. First, the fact that she has no friends is related to the fact why she's obsessed with her dog. Second: you don’t want to be kicked out of bed at night because her dog can't sleep on the floor, or forced to sit in the backseat while Max rides shotgun because he gets car sick. See where I'm getting?

People who are obsessed with their animals have people issues. The fact that she has no friends proves this.

Recommendation: start masturbating again. If you're only getting laid once every 3 weeks, it's unhealthy for you to be that long without releasing your manhood.

Lets try not to get too far off topic. If anything, TheArtArtist, has illustrated why screening is so incredibly important. You cannot have a healthy, drama-free LTR with a girl who is completely unsuited for the role. Moreover, Art has allowed this girl to get away with really bad behavior so she is unlikely to change in the foreseeable future. He now runs to her every time she has a new crisis (i.e. he's become Captain Save-a-ho) and only gets laid once every 3 weeks. That sucks.

Art, I feel for you.. I've totally been there before. You'll have to decide for yourself how much you can take before you decide to break it off. You'll be happier in the long run when you do. There are a ton of women out their who are a lot less stressful to deal with and who will want to have sex with you a lot more often.

-Wolf

One problem with such screening that is coming to mind is that girls may hide such flaws until they have you emotionally invested. In my experience with the depressed girl she managed to hide her depression for several months.

That may be true. Nobody's going to catch everything right away, but the point is to not miss the glaringly obvious red flags.. The ones right in front of your face that should tell you RIGHT AWAY not to get too emotionally attached.

-Wolf

That was areally thruthful post, however on the freaks part I agreeded with everything except I've found that women that have been abused in their past either by parents or husbands are the least likely to cheat as they are desperate for security and love obviously if the guy is low value she would cheat becuase he's not offering her secuirty. But anyway another sound post!

Awesome post.
For some reason I meet a lot of freaks. And not only do they cause a lot of drama, they just generally love it.

Last girl I was seeing also had daddy issues. It's weird, they say in psychology that women with daddy issues usually go for bad boys. And when you read it you're like: "yea right, that's just a general conclusion, it's probably not correct 7 out of 10 times.". But it's actually fucking true. Almost all woman with daddy issues go for bad boys.

Anyway it makes sense, badboys cause a lot of drama too, they don't give a shit about the girl so they disrespect her (especially when she gives him crap). But if he did ONLY that he'd lose her. So he's nice to her sometimes too. This creates an emotional rollercoaster of drama, love/hate relationships, etc.

It mind boggles me every time to hear they stay in abusive relationships, but they delude themselves and only think about the good times. Because there are some good times... they just don't think with their minds, but with their hearts;
"I LOVE HIM!" *drama drama drama, emotional spike, emotional spike, emotional spike.*
"YES, THIS IS LOVE! I TRULY LOVE HIM!*

yuck.

I've also heard them telling me stories about how they cheated on their boyfriend, and rationalize it away with:
"Yeah, I cheated on him, but it's his fault, cause he didn't give me enough attention."
or
"I only cheated on him, cause he never took me to any place fun"


With these girls I sometimes just purposefully pick fights and cause drama, only to make up for it later. It's hard too, cause with every fight you sometimes feel the fear of losing her. I guess you can't handle these girls if you're afraid of losing them.

I don't like it, but if I get too sweet to them they lose interest... no drama = boring to them. I guess with them it's what gives them that occasional "spark" they need in a relationship.

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Awesome That was really good post.I caterogized my girlfriend in 2cnds and also few others I have had..........

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