Hi, sorry if this is a bit long, but here goes: I'm in love with this girl called Jane who I've known on & off for years. I'm obsessed with her and I'm desperate to have her and marry her. I'm so besotted I don't even care if she has sex with me, I just want her to love me. If I could win her heart I'd be the happiest guy in the world and would feel like a billionaire. However, if she turns me down I won't be able to take the heartbreak and I'm scared I'll kill myself to end the pain. I haven't got much to live for anyway, because the only thing I want/need in life is sexy girls, and girls never seem to be interested in me. I know I sound like a complete noob/loser/geek/virgin/idiot, and maybe I am, but I really want to establish a way to try and woo her, and I'm hoping you guys can help me.

So basically she's smart, funny, quirky and pretty, and she's got that special something I just can't put into words. She amazes me, but she's quite friendly and down-to-Earth. Now here's the weird thing: I'm usually extremely shallow with girls, and never understood the idea of loving someone for their personality before, but she's just perfect for me. I'll openly admit she's NOT the sexiest girl in the world, I probably see hotter girls than her every day, but for some reason she's the best, and I'd turn down a supermodel for her in a heartbeat.

Problem is, I'm a complete novice when it comes to girls, I'd probably be below AFC material. I'm a pretty successful guy, academically & financially, I'm average height and I don't think I'm bad looking, but for some reason I have no luck with girls. I never get girls flirting with me or even looking at me, and nightclubs seem to be nothing but endless disappointment for guys not lucky enough to be loud 6'2" studs with model good looks. I consider myself a virgin because I've never even kissed a girl who wasn't a prostitute. I don't think prostitute sex counts, it's fun but it doesn't mean anything. I did once date a really obese ugly girl, but we didn't do anything physical and I think she just thought I was better than nothing. I'm a bit shy but I'm not completely socially retarded, I just can't figure out what's wrong with me! I have absolute zero confidence with girls, because I'm a virgin and I'm hence convinced that no girls want me, particularly not decent-looking ones. This belief of mine is based on my past track record with girls, which is practically non-existent.

Despite this, I somehow have a way of acting confident/cocky, and I do this around this special girl Jane, by teasing her and acting like she doesn't mean that much to me (even though secretly she is of course everything to me). I gather from the PUA community that cocky/funny is a viable strategy, and I probably neg her a fair bit. My worst fear is for her to realise the geek I really am, so I take any opportunity to try and seem cool around her. She seems to like me, at least as a friend, she often talks to me/shows off and she once asked if I had a girlfriend, so I keep trying to convince myself that she fancies me, based on this. But I want to try and make her like me, and I've even considered plastic surgery to make her fancy me, face-wise. I'd do anything to maximise her opinion of me because I know I won't be able to take it if she rejects me - I'd rather be burnt to death than not have her.

Thinking practically, what could I do to try and win her heart? Should I tell her how I feel, straight ask her out, or practise on other, lesser girls first? (All other girls are automatically inferior to her though, even if they look physically sexier). Mind you, the standard solution to oneitis of FTOW (Fk 10 other women) seems damn near impossible for a sub-AFC loser like me. Anyway thanks a lot in advance for any help you guys can give me!

Yea they do, 80% of what you are saying isn't coming out of your mouth.. Womens intuition is 10x better than mens. They can basically feel what your thinking during a conversation.. Any guy thats gets women knows this to be true..

Just figured I'd correct that for you, you obviously don't wanna be helped, you just want someone to vent to. Carry on.

you have already made a serious mistake by letting these thoughts about her fester in your mind. Remember one of the simple pick up rules. The 3 second rule. Like the other guy said. You need to forget about her , at least for a while and move on to something else. At this point , I can't imagine you asking her out and it going well for you. You always have to have a handful of girls at your disposal , so you don't just have one that she's all you can think about. that will mess up your head.

Sorry for saying this, but what you're experiencing isn't love. It's obsession. Those are two entirely different things.

I've feel you man. I've had the worst cases of one-itis ever. Yes, in pluralis.

But I've also managed to have one of them fall in love with me. So I know how to counter this.

Yes, another counter except FTOW. But I warn you, it's a LOT more harder. But if you want to win her over, this is the only way...

The secret, is to take distance. Yup, you heard me. Distance. Stop hanging with her, stop calling her, stop everything. This will be huge, for her. She will sense this sudden change, and wonder what has happened. And as time distorts perception, her memories will be dazed.

At the same time, you will go through hell. The first days, or even weeks, will fill like crap. Maybe even suicidal. But whatever you do, DON'T CONTACT HER IN ANY WAY. That will ruin any chances. Just restrain yourself, and use all this time to MEET OTHER PEOPLE. Have fun with friends and force yourself to meet other women, even if you fail. Just do it.

This way, you will stop detoxinating yourself. Just trust me - you can be stuck with a girl for years because you're always left in the gray, but as soon you take distance she starts wandering off your mind. Slowly.

Then, let's say one month later, if she picks up contact again, answer COLDLY. Not as it's intentionally coldly, just act neutral and slightly disinterested. This will also be huge for her. If you had any chance with her to begin with, she will feel replaced.

There's more behind everything, but start off with this. 100% of the times I've usen this, I've went back from AFC++ to high value male, losing my obsession, and reigniting her attention. In one case, I became a former one-itis' one-itis. Ironic huh?

So there's still hope. But you have to go through hell for it.

I'd kill myself for her, if she told me to.

You’re so incredibly lucky, how did you manage that and why did you let her go?

I don't normally give a response if it's non-constructive but seriously dude, go f*ck yourself!! U received the answers you were looking for but you are too immature to accept them. I can honestly say I have never felt "head over heels" for a girl in my 25 years but I don't think the shit you are saying is normal/healthy. I would forget about banging girls and possibly see a mental health specialist.

Also Normally oneitis is caused by desperation(90% of time). You build up a false image of this women and worship her. If you do get the girl, you soon realize, she farts, she shits, she screws shit up, she says retarded shit, she nags, her pussy stinks, bad blow jobs, hates your family/you hate hers, ect...... The way you see these special girls is a figment of your imagination caused by the crappiness of your own life. Unless she actually one one those 10%! But even then, don't devote your life to trying to be with her.