I think i came across this sort of community type about a year ago. Since then progress has been very poor. I can see improvements in my persona but anxiety for approaching remains as bad as ever. It's come to the point i don't know where to go at again. I have established roots of the problems, but identifying them is one thing, and implementing them into place is another. So i'll go into more detail into this in the next paragraph to break this up nicely...
Ok, so i'm in my room at this time, listening to music, always feeling quite motivated in the sense of that i will be up for it tomorrow, and make sure to do something about it. However the day comes and motivation has gone. It seems like such a nice idea to myself, but i feel i must just get scared of the whole idea of it, maybe? I am a Uni student in year 2, and also have a job at a food store. There i work at the checkouts, and find talking to people easy, and i really do enjoy serving the hot and pretty girls there. I find myself almost thinking i'm in a position of power where i'm sitting and can make the conversation easily as long as they are receptive. I've made a few pretty girls blush, which i guess isn't a bad thing? But it's that sort of position i do well in, but then on the street, train platform, even in pubs when out, that confidence goes with meeting new girls, and i just can't do it. The amount of girls i have approached even on a night out drunk is frighteningly low, and i have no idea why i can't do this, but it seems to be my persona drops when in a position i don't feel overly comfortable in (even when i'm in clubs playing music i really like, i generally only go to underground venues playing house, dubstep, techno sort of music etc., not the clubs playing commercial music and such.). What i was wondering more than anything is how on earth do i change this? I was quite proud of myself the other day as i approached some girl on a night out, thought it was awkward as i saw she was crying and she said he bf had been gone for 10 mins and was worried (seemed like one of those girls to avoid), so i said everything would be ok, and then ejected. Felt happy as i actually approached even though after a fair few beers my body was so scared of making the approach (mad how my body was telling me just not to do it, but she was nice and receptive and didn't mind the approach).
So more than anything it seems like a situational sort of thing. In places i feel like i have power, like my house, and where i work i am confident. In other places i am not. How to cure this sort of thing?
The amount of times i've said i want to change and will change is getting mad now. I really need to show some progress, but i don't really know how abouts to do this, as too many times i've had these thoughts with no end product. It's all the mind i know, but it is taking the piss a bit now.
Would love to know what you guys think i could do. I feel like i need some sort of plan laid out to me in motion to what to do. Not something i could stick to but something i have to stick to somehow? Interested in day game and night game sort of thing. Where do you suggest i start, as it's almost at the stage i need to start, as i have hardly got anywhere in previous months. All the motivation given is highly appreciated
CHAT