Next steps. How to keep her interested? College newbie.



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PostPosted: Thu Oct 27, 2011 1:32 am 
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Joined: Sun Oct 09, 2011 9:00 pm
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Hey, guys. New to the game. Senior in college. Met a girl on campus. She's a junior, but mature, no playing games. Approached her on park bench. Used "shy card." Built rapport. Got number. Went on successful 1st date where I played the piano and then we had dessert and excellent convo. She loves the piano, plays herself. She's usually very responsive to txts. She always conveys enthusiasm and told me straight up she had a good time and was excited for 2nd date.

Went on 2nd date to a movie I was an extra in. Very slight kino escalation...nothing much. Asked her for plans after. She had none. Asked if i did. Told her bout a party I was 50/50 on going and asked her if she wanted to go. She said maybe. After talking bout other things, asked her if she wanted me to make a call and see the status on the party. She just said "it's fine, i can just go home." I asked "you sure?" She said, "ya." Txted her after date as a joke saying "i can change your name from "____ from the park" to your full name." She responded "hahaha. just curious, do you do that often? Like start talkin to girls like that?" I said "no, usually meet through clubs at school, introductions, etc. But i saw you and wanted to talk to you cuz i knew i'd regret it if i didn't. why do you ask?" She responded "just curious. it's cause it doesn't happen often! haha." I said "well i just did it and i'm glad i did."

I was told by friends next day I basically ditched her for party w/o realizing it. So I sent a txt that next day after date explaining I may have messed up and wanted to spend more time w/ her but she seemed to want to go home and that i only stayed at party for about 20 min. She responded at night saying no worries, and that she was confused but made sense. I asked "confused that i wasn't having a good time?" She said "no, that you had plans and maybe didn't want to hang out." I said "plans can change. thought you wanted to call it a nite. a misunderstanding, lol." She agreed. I told her "well let's make up for that lost time and get together this wknd." She said "it's halloween! going home away from school to visit my sis." I said "she's visiting from ohio?" She said "yes! surprised you remembered she's from ohio." I said, "lol, i listen. you told me she works at ______. okay now i'm just showing off haha :P" she laughed. told her my bro might actually be visiting me at school this wknd." No response.

Anyway, apologies for long background. But this last convo was on Sunday. It's Wednesday now and no contact b/w us. When should I txt her and about what? Should i txt her? I was thinking about something that reminds me of her. But, again, when? And we won't see each other this wknd, so prob not until the following wknd, assuming i get a 3rd date. How do i keep her interested till then? I want to make her as responsive as she was up until i "ditched" her, b/c it seems like it's dipped slightly. I kind of gave her power by messing up and admitting to it, but now want to move on and be in control like in the beginning.

Thanks so much guys. Really appreciate it.

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PostPosted: Thu Oct 27, 2011 3:43 am 
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Joined: Tue Oct 25, 2011 3:51 am
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Location: Tennessee
The set might already be lost, the beginning of sets (before you have sex) are easy to mess up, even a small mistake can ruin everything and once a set is ruined you cant fix it XD iv had to learn this from harsh experience.

You probably should of at least kiss her on the 1st date, definitly should have kissed her on the 3rd date. If you dont at the very least kiss the girl soon and within that short time span then its useally lost, its very imporatnt right after building some comfort to start expressing sexuality and then switch to seduction. If you stay at comfort building for to long then you get the dreaded LJBF (Lets just be friends) or it ruins everything all together.

And u already mentioned it but apologizing to her was bad, lowered your value, it might of even raised your value by blowing her off, makes you look even more imporant and like you have options.

So anyways might be a lost set, but definitly worth still texting her just whenever and see where it goes


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PostPosted: Sun Oct 30, 2011 11:55 pm 
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Joined: Thu May 26, 2011 8:16 pm
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I'm in a very similar situation with a girl right now. Last time I met her was Friday on a party, but things were not going too well and now I'm thinking about what to do. Have you already taken further step? Does anyone have more advice?


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PostPosted: Tue Nov 01, 2011 8:43 pm 
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I did take further steps. So Sunday was when we last had txted. Then I txted her on Friday about something that reminded me of her and that made her laugh. Convo seemed to be going well, but I could sense a slight change. She wasn't AS responsive/excited. I decided to disregard it, though.

Saturday, more txting. Then I said that I remembered we still hadn't played tennis, since we both play. She was totally down, but, out of nowhere, adds this serious txt of wanting to make sure we're on the same page and all. Said she knows we'd been txting a lot, but isn't looking for a relationship RIGHT NOW and would like to just hang out as friends.

BS, b/c I know she's interested in me b/c my intentions were clear when I picked her up at the park and she gave me her number. She's been giving a number of IOI's. So my take is she is just trying to take it slow and protect herself from getting hurt by trying us out as "friends" first. For instance, she expressed concern that I may be a player, so she probably still has that concern regardless of the fact I told her I'm not.

So I responded to her "friend" txt in a nonchalant brushing it off way with "okay, we'll set up a time to play tennis." She responds with "Yea! I mean, how do you feel about what i said?" Right there, she's still curious. She's still interested. I said "okay" but she wants more detail on what I'm thinking. She doesn't want to write off any chance of a relationship, which is why she wants to know my take on it all, and also why at first she said no relationship "right now."

I responded with "well i thought there was something there....but i'm cool with being friends." She said "okay, yea, just wanted to make sure we're on the same page and all." Notice, she didn't completely disregard there being something there.


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