Ok...

I'll be the first one to tell you I've got a unique style towards picking up women. I didn't go the easy route and study many love guru's, digest a bunch of openers, routines, and closes to attract women.

I took the long and scenic route. I read maybe two or three books on pick-up and honestly got bored with it once I applied the simple idea of getting off my ass and talking to girls. Sure, I got rejected several times at the beginning, but I wasn't a bitch and complained about it, go home and call my friends and ask what's wrong with me. I'd find a simple solution and build my game around simple principles I learned through trial and error.

Consider this a rude awakening...

Wanting to be a “PUA” was so cool back before Mystery plastered it into every nursing home living area with his VH1 show. These days, most guys cringe when they hear the three-letter acronym and only use the poo-ahs lexicon ironically.

Hilariously, I have swamped my leisure time on helping people snip away from the status quo in pick-up and help struggling, confused guys become normal and…actually start picking up chicks (wow, there’s a novel concept).

While most master pickup artists were busy practicing their calibrated back-turn technique for next year’s PUA Olympics, I'm watching Spongbob with my nephew and building a better life for my family.

Am I coming off snarky? I hope so, because I'm fed up with guys wanting to learn pickup and ending up learning how to impress men on the internet.

So, without further condescending ado, I present you my checklist for anyone who wants to leave PUA Land and who actually pickup hot women:

1. This is not self-development.
Sorry, but it’s not. How can tapping into something we all currently have inside us be discribed as development? At the chat rooms I offhandedly brought this up much to the shocked chagrin of many guys in the room (my brother could hear me laughing from across the house)

There’s nothing wrong with wanting to improve your life, but if that’s what you want to do, then you’re NOT doing pickup. If your goal is to pickup girls, put the Napoleon Hill book down, go to the bar, mall, library, restaurant, and start hitting on hot chicks.

2.This is DEFINITELY not spiritual enlightenment.
When you think of classic ladies’ men, who comes to mind? Brando? Heffner? Eckhart Tolle? If you honestly think reading The Power of Now is going to help you put your pimp foot forward, you’re living on another planet…or another “Nation.” Guys needs to put down the payote sandwich and get snapped back to reality.

3.Stop practicing your “skill set,” start focusing on the girl.
Picking up girls is not a set of skills to master as if earning Boy Scott badges. Instead, learning to effectively meet and attract women is all about shifting the way you see the world, how you relate to other people, and adopting empowering mindsets. It may take time, but once you “get it” most of your so-called game will take care of itself.

4.You don’t need to tease her for her to like you.
Guys. Seriously. Please stop with the teasing. Most “teasing” comes off really try-hard and contrived. I know the gurus told you that you can tease your way into a woman’s heart, but you can’t. In fact, most guys tease themselves out of sex.

5.Ignore everything Mystery ever wrote. Hey, I’ll be the first to admit that I read Mystery Method and drank the Koolaid just like everyone else. But, after enough time picking up girls in the world, I’m now campaigning for Barnes and Nobles to re-categorize that book under its proper genre: “Science Fiction & Fantasy.” You’d honestly find better pickup advice in The Two Towers than what you’d find in that book, or even anything Neil Strauss wrote either.

6.Openers were invented to create conversions among men, not to begin conversations with women.
I hate even using the term “opener” because I hate that such a term even exists. The idea that you need an “opener” before you can talk to a woman is complete emasculating bullshit. Simply letting noise come out of your mouth is enough of an opener for almost any girl. The opener doesn’t matter at all—what you do next is what counts.

7.If you want to be “social,” join Toastmasters.
There’s absolutely no correlation between “acting social” and getting girls. In fact, I’ve seen more instances were being a social butterfly made a guy look like a jackass. If you want to pickup girls, don’t be social—be sexual.

8.If it was fun in grammar school…it’s probably immature now.
I know guys think acting “wacky” and playing all sorts of “games” with girls is somehow attractive, but this whole “if it worked grammar school, it’ll work now” idea has got to stop. The only “games” that are going to get you closer to a girl are the ones that don’t involve clothes—not stuff you did when you were 7 years old on the playground.

9.The only guys allowed to give advice while out are the guys who’re hooking up with chicks, but since they’re hooking up with chicks, they can’t give advice.
See the paradox? So what the hell were you doing last Friday night giving your buddy some hot tips on his body rocking when you should’ve been hooking up with a girl? You’re ONLY qualified to give advice on girls while out IF you’re too busy to give advice with girls while out.

10.Girlfriends are cool again.
I’m well aware that having a girlfriend to a pickup artist is considered extremely lame and “AFC.” Well, I got news for you…GIRLFRIENDS ARE GREAT. Seriously, what is cooler than being with a girl you really like on a lazy Friday night, cuddled up, enjoying pizza and wine, and watching Rambo 3? Wait, what were you doing Friday night? Talking game out at the bar? Yeah. That’s what I thought.

11.If you’re worried about “AMOGs” you have bigger problems than not being able to attract women.
If you’re leaving the house seriously afraid of getting “AMOG’d” by another guy, then you have what’s called A VICTIM’S MENTALITY. If that’s the case, learning to pickup women is the least of your concerns. People are not out to get you. The term I use for other guys who try to “steal” my date is “entertainment.” If you’re not looking for nearest bowl of popcorn when some “AMOG” rolls up on your girlfriend at the bar, then you’ve been spending too much time working on your skill set.

12.Sexual escalation is 90 percent of learning pickup, yet is only covered by 10 percent of the materials.
Teaching guys how to overcome their sexual anxiety is the real “magic bullet” of the pickup and dating industry—yet no one talks much about it. Learn to escalate fast, learn game. Period.

That is what I've learned throughout the 6 years I've studied pick-up.

What do you disagree with that other people preach about?

_________________
You all take 'er easy. And if she's easy, take her twice.

I'm inclined to agree with your sentiment. So many of the people who get into pick-up are complete and utter nerds - they view it as a science. They're completely lost in the water if they haven't rehearsed all of their negs, opener routines, DHVs and whatever. They can't just socialize with a woman for the sake of socializing.

As for what you said about Mystery... I would agree with you to a certain extent. I think he's completely insane (that fucking hat just makes him look creepy, too), but some of the basic groundwork he talks about isn't completely misguided. He's just got one method to an art - Saying Mystery Method is 'invalid' is like saying death metal is invalid - Sure, it's full of sweaty, self obsessed nerds who have no idea how society works, but hey! Who are we to complain. That's just their way of approaching things.

They/we're called Pickup *artists* for a reason. It's about trying new things, being creative. Not just following a certain set of rules.

Anyway, my rant's done. Your advice is pretty good, I must say.

Couldn't agree more with this post.
Especially with #1.
For the longest time I thought I was doing "self improvement"... Took me almost a year to figure out I was completely wrong.

Great post Tom.

Serj

_________________
Sinceriously,
Serj

But you forget for those who are AFC's this DOES help heaps. i have fucked 2x more chicks this year then i have in my life since i have really put my head down and read the game and some other shit and the forums.

also helps you interact with women better and know whats really going on when people are interacting (noticing other peoples body language and noticing their pickup attempts and where they fail/succeed)

Dont be butthurt if its not working as well for you as it does the pro's[/b]

[quote="Tom_"Maybe""]Ok...

1. This is not self-development.
Sorry, but it’s not. How can tapping into something we all currently have inside us be discribed as development? At the chat rooms I offhandedly brought this up much to the shocked chagrin of many guys in the room (my brother could hear me laughing from across the house)

There’s nothing wrong with wanting to improve your life, but if that’s what you want to do, then you’re NOT doing pickup. If your goal is to pickup girls, put the Napoleon Hill book down, go to the bar, mall, library, restaurant, and start hitting on hot chicks.

Some people don't get it or don't believe they have it in them the first place (which most do, you just need to be confident enough to show your best self and actually try to shag girls).

2.This is DEFINITELY not spiritual enlightenment.
When you think of classic ladies’ men, who comes to mind? Brando? Heffner? Eckhart Tolle? If you honestly think reading The Power of Now is going to help you put your pimp foot forward, you’re living on another planet…or another “Nation.” Guys needs to put down the payote sandwich and get snapped back to reality.

You're right. Anyone who thinks they are above normal men or in a cult or anything gay like that is a douche.

3.Stop practicing your “skill set,” start focusing on the girl.
Picking up girls is not a set of skills to master as if earning Boy Scott badges. Instead, learning to effectively meet and attract women is all about shifting the way you see the world, how you relate to other people, and adopting empowering mindsets. It may take time, but once you “get it” most of your so-called game will take care of itself.

Bolded is so true! I bet when other guys get it too they'll think "wow, it really was that easy and simple?"

4.You don’t need to tease her for her to like you.
Guys. Seriously. Please stop with the teasing. Most “teasing” comes off really try-hard and contrived. I know the gurus told you that you can tease your way into a woman’s heart, but you can’t. In fact, most guys tease themselves out of sex.

True, but sometimes you don't even have to do anything for her to like you. C&F works for some people (probably those who are actually funny) and being sexual works too as long as you're not creepy.

5.Ignore everything Mystery ever wrote. Hey, I’ll be the first to admit that I read Mystery Method and drank the Koolaid just like everyone else. But, after enough time picking up girls in the world, I’m now campaigning for Barnes and Nobles to re-categorize that book under its proper genre: “Science Fiction & Fantasy.” You’d honestly find better pickup advice in The Two Towers than what you’d find in that book, or even anything Neil Strauss wrote either.

Whilst I agree with the opening statement I fail to see how there's more pickup advice in The Two Towers. Mystery created a method that worked for him to pick up girls, despite all of its fallacies.

6.Openers were invented to create conversions among men, not to begin conversations with women.
I hate even using the term “opener” because I hate that such a term even exists. The idea that you need an “opener” before you can talk to a woman is complete emasculating bullshit. Simply letting noise come out of your mouth is enough of an opener for almost any girl. The opener doesn’t matter at all—what you do next is what counts.

+1[u/]

7.If you want to be “social,” join Toastmasters.
There’s absolutely no correlation between “acting social” and getting girls. In fact, I’ve seen more instances were being a social butterfly made a guy look like a jackass. If you want to pickup girls, don’t be social—be sexual.

Wtf is Toastmasters? You're wrong here, at my university I have a ton of girl friends, and girls have more girls as friends and when we get introduced I already have mutual rapport which makes it so much more easier. It's immediate acceptance by the girls, all you have to do is show her you're not a gimp and get her own her own, get with her. It's that easy.

8.If it was fun in grammar school…it’s probably immature now.
I know guys think acting “wacky” and playing all sorts of “games” with girls is somehow attractive, but this whole “if it worked grammar school, it’ll work now” idea has got to stop. The only “games” that are going to get you closer to a girl are the ones that don’t involve clothes—not stuff you did when you were 7 years old on the playground.

What games? Tig? Stuck in the mud? No clue.

9.The only guys allowed to give advice while out are the guys who’re hooking up with chicks, but since they’re hooking up with chicks, they can’t give advice.
See the paradox? So what the hell were you doing last Friday night giving your buddy some hot tips on his body rocking when you should’ve been hooking up with a girl? You’re ONLY qualified to give advice on girls while out IF you’re too busy to give advice with girls while out.

So, according to you, this forum should have loads of questions with no replies? What? If you have a girlfriend but know the answer to the guy's question, are you qualified?

10.Girlfriends are cool again.
I’m well aware that having a girlfriend to a pickup artist is considered extremely lame and “AFC.” Well, I got news for you…GIRLFRIENDS ARE GREAT. Seriously, what is cooler than being with a girl you really like on a lazy Friday night, cuddled up, enjoying pizza and wine, and watching Rambo 3? Wait, what were you doing Friday night? Talking game out at the bar? Yeah. That’s what I thought.

Bit ad hominem. You can have loads of fun with and without girlfriends.

11.If you’re worried about “AMOGs” you have bigger problems than not being able to attract women.
If you’re leaving the house seriously afraid of getting “AMOG’d” by another guy, then you have what’s called A VICTIM’S MENTALITY. If that’s the case, learning to pickup women is the least of your concerns. People are not out to get you. The term I use for other guys who try to “steal” my date is “entertainment.” If you’re not looking for nearest bowl of popcorn when some “AMOG” rolls up on your girlfriend at the bar, then you’ve been spending too much time working on your skill set.

So true. If you're worried about another guy taking your girl you're insecure or not comfortable with yourself, something that would probably be called inner game issues on this forum.

12.Sexual escalation is 90 percent of learning pickup, yet is only covered by 10 percent of the materials.
Teaching guys how to overcome their sexual anxiety is the real “magic bullet” of the pickup and dating industry—yet no one talks much about it. Learn to escalate fast, learn game. Period.

That is what I've learned throughout the 6 years I've studied pick-up.

What do you disagree with that other people preach about?[/quote]

Replies underlined.

You've hit the nail on the head with a lot of the things here. However are you talking solely about night game because many 'PUAs' do daygame and hit on girls during the day. Also what about the guys that need improvement on the girls that reject them.

I thought this whole pick up thing for normal people was to get the previously unattainable girls that show you no signs of interest (or you just didn't see them) into wanting to go on dates with you and sleep with you.

_________________
I don't even need directions from you, but I'm gonna get an erection from you.

This is mainly a good post, but there are some points I disagree on.
No, the main aim of PUA is to get women but improving you life IS something that many people need to do in order to fulfil the primary goal. If you are un-employed and living with your parents (and you are over 23ish) then you need to get your shit together before anything else. Just in the same way as if your really un-fit you should really aim on improving that first. The way to look at it is you should always try to improve your limiting factor if you can.
Think of it in money terms, you may have the greatest investment idea ever that will earn you millions and you can practice it all you want - but if you haven't done a few weeks work at a fast food joint to get your start up money then guess what, you ain't got anything to invest

This is narrow minded of you. Don't simply say something doesn't work when frankly it does. The reason some people come off as dicks/stupid when they tease is because they don't know how to or do it constantly. However, know when to have a bit of fun for goodness sake! I am not saying there is always a need to tease a girl (or your friends for that matter) but if the situation presents itself why not - never had a girl you on a date with playfully hit you in the arm cos you teased her about her my little pony collection? Guess what, that was her flirting with you....
Sorry man, but that is just bullshit. Nothing sets you up with a girl better than being introduced by a mutual friend as an awesome guy (note: this is why point 1 isn't right) who everyone loves. Let me give you an example from my own life, clubbing the other night I was chatting to two beautiful girls for about 20mins and during that time 2-3 groups of people (men and HB's) came up to give me high 5's and say how awesome I am and told the girls how I am "such a legend" and the event organiser even walked past and offered me a free bottle of champagne. These were MASSIVE dhv's for me and played their part in me closing one of the girls. This all came about BECAUSE I WAS SOCIAL.
I think what you are trying to say is social without sexual = not picking up girls. Social with sexual = lots of women.
If you honestly believe this then you must be boring as hell to go out with. Don't get obsessed with picking up women! Seriously, on a night out I will open a few sets but I will also hang out with my friends and try to help some of them out as well. Does this mean I don't get any action? of course not. You don't have to be getting with women all the time, there are other ways to have fun without becoming obsessive about hooking up with chicks 24/7.

A prime example is I had just k-closed a girl at a bar and we went back to the table to chat for a bit with our friends (as her group and mine had mixed) and one of my mates was failing with this girl because he simply wasn't touching her or acting interested (he was trying to play it cool and she was giving him loads of IOI's) - so I sat next to him and quickly told him that she was into him and that he should physically escalate and talk about the fact he just finished his body guard qualification and show her some stuff etc.


All in all though man, you made some good points but try not to go from one extreme to the other. Being a successful PUA isn't all about just being a sexual guy just the same as it isn't all about being a social, inner game junkie - its about a balance.

Madals

You know, I clicked onto this thread and started reading this and I thought to myself...

"gee, I've read this someplace before..."

One question Tom...why you ripping off my buddy Rob Judge for?

pla·gia·rism/ˈplājəˌrizəm/
Noun: The practice of taking someone else's work or ideas and passing them off as one's own

All you did was take an article that Rob Judge wrote and replaced a few things. Stop being a KJ and stealing other peoples work.

The article by Rob Judge: http://www.robjudge.net/2010/09/taking- ... f-garbage/

_________________
Never get broken up with again: the-addiction-formula-never-get-broken- ... 88794.html

[quote="Tom_"Maybe""]Ok...

I'll be the first one to tell you I've got a unique style towards picking up women. I didn't go the easy route and study many love guru's, digest a bunch of openers, routines, and closes to attract women.

I took the long and scenic route. I read maybe two or three books on pick-up and honestly got bored with it once I applied the simple idea of getting off my ass and talking to girls. Sure, I got rejected several times at the beginning, but I wasn't a bitch and complained about it, go home and call my friends and ask what's wrong with me. I'd find a simple solution and build my game around simple principles I learned through trial and error.

Consider this a rude awakening...

Wanting to be a “PUA” was so cool back before Mystery plastered it into every nursing home living area with his VH1 show. These days, most guys cringe when they hear the three-letter acronym and only use the poo-ahs lexicon ironically.

Hilariously, I have swamped my leisure time on helping people snip away from the status quo in pick-up and help struggling, confused guys become normal and…actually start picking up chicks (wow, there’s a novel concept).

While most master pickup artists were busy practicing their calibrated back-turn technique for next year’s PUA Olympics, I'm watching Spongbob with my nephew and building a better life for my family.

Am I coming off snarky? I hope so, because I'm fed up with guys wanting to learn pickup and ending up learning how to impress men on the internet.

So, without further condescending ado, I present you my checklist for anyone who wants to leave PUA Land and who actually pickup hot women:

1. This is not self-development.
Sorry, but it’s not. How can tapping into something we all currently have inside us be discribed as development? At the chat rooms I offhandedly brought this up much to the shocked chagrin of many guys in the room (my brother could hear me laughing from across the house)

There’s nothing wrong with wanting to improve your life, but if that’s what you want to do, then you’re NOT doing pickup. If your goal is to pickup girls, put the Napoleon Hill book down, go to the bar, mall, library, restaurant, and start hitting on hot chicks.

2.This is DEFINITELY not spiritual enlightenment.
When you think of classic ladies’ men, who comes to mind? Brando? Heffner? Eckhart Tolle? If you honestly think reading The Power of Now is going to help you put your pimp foot forward, you’re living on another planet…or another “Nation.” Guys needs to put down the payote sandwich and get snapped back to reality.

3.Stop practicing your “skill set,” start focusing on the girl.
Picking up girls is not a set of skills to master as if earning Boy Scott badges. Instead, learning to effectively meet and attract women is all about shifting the way you see the world, how you relate to other people, and adopting empowering mindsets. It may take time, but once you “get it” most of your so-called game will take care of itself.

4.You don’t need to tease her for her to like you.
Guys. Seriously. Please stop with the teasing. Most “teasing” comes off really try-hard and contrived. I know the gurus told you that you can tease your way into a woman’s heart, but you can’t. In fact, most guys tease themselves out of sex.

5.Ignore everything Mystery ever wrote. Hey, I’ll be the first to admit that I read Mystery Method and drank the Koolaid just like everyone else. But, after enough time picking up girls in the world, I’m now campaigning for Barnes and Nobles to re-categorize that book under its proper genre: “Science Fiction & Fantasy.” You’d honestly find better pickup advice in The Two Towers than what you’d find in that book, or even anything Neil Strauss wrote either.

6.Openers were invented to create conversions among men, not to begin conversations with women.
I hate even using the term “opener” because I hate that such a term even exists. The idea that you need an “opener” before you can talk to a woman is complete emasculating bullshit. Simply letting noise come out of your mouth is enough of an opener for almost any girl. The opener doesn’t matter at all—what you do next is what counts.

7.If you want to be “social,” join Toastmasters.
There’s absolutely no correlation between “acting social” and getting girls. In fact, I’ve seen more instances were being a social butterfly made a guy look like a jackass. If you want to pickup girls, don’t be social—be sexual.

8.If it was fun in grammar school…it’s probably immature now.
I know guys think acting “wacky” and playing all sorts of “games” with girls is somehow attractive, but this whole “if it worked grammar school, it’ll work now” idea has got to stop. The only “games” that are going to get you closer to a girl are the ones that don’t involve clothes—not stuff you did when you were 7 years old on the playground.

9.The only guys allowed to give advice while out are the guys who’re hooking up with chicks, but since they’re hooking up with chicks, they can’t give advice.
See the paradox? So what the hell were you doing last Friday night giving your buddy some hot tips on his body rocking when you should’ve been hooking up with a girl? You’re ONLY qualified to give advice on girls while out IF you’re too busy to give advice with girls while out.

10.Girlfriends are cool again.
I’m well aware that having a girlfriend to a pickup artist is considered extremely lame and “AFC.” Well, I got news for you…GIRLFRIENDS ARE GREAT. Seriously, what is cooler than being with a girl you really like on a lazy Friday night, cuddled up, enjoying pizza and wine, and watching Rambo 3? Wait, what were you doing Friday night? Talking game out at the bar? Yeah. That’s what I thought.

11.If you’re worried about “AMOGs” you have bigger problems than not being able to attract women.
If you’re leaving the house seriously afraid of getting “AMOG’d” by another guy, then you have what’s called A VICTIM’S MENTALITY. If that’s the case, learning to pickup women is the least of your concerns. People are not out to get you. The term I use for other guys who try to “steal” my date is “entertainment.” If you’re not looking for nearest bowl of popcorn when some “AMOG” rolls up on your girlfriend at the bar, then you’ve been spending too much time working on your skill set.

12.Sexual escalation is 90 percent of learning pickup, yet is only covered by 10 percent of the materials.
Teaching guys how to overcome their sexual anxiety is the real “magic bullet” of the pickup and dating industry—yet no one talks much about it. Learn to escalate fast, learn game. Period.

That is what I've learned throughout the 6 years I've studied pick-up.

What do you disagree with that other people preach about?[/quote]

Just quoting the whole thing incase he tries to edit it.

_________________
Never get broken up with again: the-addiction-formula-never-get-broken- ... 88794.html

Consider this an official warning for violation of forum rule 3