| What's up fellas.
First off, my credentials. I've spent the last 5 years sarging in clubs. I've spent the last 3 years learning stuff from all the PUA masters, like Mystery, Style, DeAngelo, Cajun, and Tyler Durgen. What I post is sum of all my experiences from trial and error and stuff I've learned from the masters which has helped me.
Approach anxiety. All guys have it. You, me, master PUAs. Here's how to over come this, forever.
Think back to your childhood, about something you were afraid of doing. Perhaps it was riding your bike without training wheels. Or perhaps it was diving off the diving board at your pool. How did you over come this fear?
Well, once you summoned the courage, and took a dive, each dive after that became easier and easier. With each dive, your fear level goes down, and down. Before you know it, you were screaming at your mom so she could watch you as you fearlessly dove head first.
What happened? Well, the following in your head clicked:
A. Diving is easy.
B. You have the skills to be a successful diver.
Once these concepts clicked, diving became easy for you.
Opening is the exact same thing. The best way to overcome AA is to train your brain, that:
A. Opening is easy
B. You have the skills to be a successful opener.
Here's how to do it. The next time you go out, just open. Don't worry about escalating, or DHVing, or even number closing.
Just go into sets, and open. Once you've opened, you can bounce out at any time you want. If the conversation really goes well, stick around. If things get awkward, or you run out of things to say, just excuse yourself.
At this point, all we're trying to do is teach our brain that opening is easy.
A lot of guys hold back from opening. They're afraid of failure. This increasing their AA, and makes them less likely to approach.
In this case, ONLY FOCUS ON THE OPENER.
Here's what happens to a lot of guys: They see a set of girls. They want to approach. They think, "Okay, if I go over and open, then what do I say? What if the girls don't like me. What if I try and number close and the girl says no. I'll look dumb in front of everyone."
Most guys are so worried about what comes after the opener, they fail to approach. AA gets the best of them.
With no pressure to take the conversation anywhere, opening because a much easier thing to do. You can bounce out at the slightest sign of awkwardness. You have all the control in the interaction. Just say, 'nice meeting you,' or 'thanks for the opinion, have a good night.'
If you do this exercise over the course of a few nights, pretty soon something clicks in your brains. Something along the lines of, "Wow, opening is really easy then I thought. I"m actually getting really good at opening."
After only a few nights of doing this, opening because no big deal. In fact, you'll get bored with opening, because you've gotten good at it. You want to move on to other things, like escalating and # closing. But those are bridges you can cross when you get there.
A few words of advice.
1. Opinion openers work great for this exercise, as do situational openers. It's important to have two or three solid openers in your mind. If you rely only on making up openers on the spot, chances are you'll freeze, or you won't think of one in time. As you get better, you'll be able to think of openers on the spot, however, chances are you're just not there yet. Just be patient.
2. I've said it before, but don't worry about the conversation leading anywhere. Once you want to eject, eject. This will eliminate any of the pressure of needing the conversation to "go" somewhere. This gives you all the power, because you can end things whenever you want, and it won't be failure. In fact, it was a success.
3. Don't limit yourself to opening only in bars and night clubs. Beautiful women are all around us. Try opening them at malls, bookstores, grocery stores, Starbucks, or where ever. Remember, there's no pressure to take the conversation anywhere. You're in total control.
Before you know it, opening will be second nature, and you can move on to mid game.
Good luck my friends.
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CHAT