Pre-requisite. -my comments are in square brackets.



About a month back I walk up to this girl and ask, 'Hey do you catch
the 89?' She answers, then I say, 'So where does that go?' Then I walk
away cos my bus drives by.


About a month later she's standing in the bus shelter
all alone. I walk into the bus shelter with a big grin.
I catch eye contact and just smile. She smiles back.

Then I say,'Hey do you catch the 89?' She laughs then says. ' Yeah,
have I just missed it?' Then we fluff for a few minites. She tells me
she is a teaching assistant in an infant school. Her bus arrives. So I
grin and say,'Hey I guess that's your bus?' Then I take out a folded
note and give it to her. the note reads:

'I hope you can help me. There's this girl who
catches the 89. I was wondering what her name is?
Text your answer to 0703877570'

(cheesy I know but they dynamics of the situation made it necessary. I
think it would have difficult to number
close her in front of other people.)


Later that evening...

S
Hi guess who its the girl who catches the 89 bus.
You should've just asked my name in person Its
S. And yours is..?

Me
Wow S.That's unusual is it turkish?
call me [tweeby]. Howz ur day bin kiddo? X

S
Lol, no. Its Irish. My friends call me s if you can't
pronounce it. My days been alright, hectic but that's usual
with work days. and yours.

Me
Dayz bin proper busy.Surfin the internet looking 4 pix
of puppies n kittens dressed un human clothes. Ha. Going out
now so mite need waking up 2moz if u catch me at le bus stop.x

S
Oh right..aww. Anyways have fun tonight, dnt drink too much
so u can actually wake up 2mo:-D Yea hopefully catch you 2mro at
the bus stop. x

Me
Oh no guess who's woken up late. U jinxed me! Ha. Oh my at
least my house mate has asprin 4 me head.x

S
I knew it! Does that mean late to work or no work? I hope
ur headache gets better.

Me
Late to work......Again. Neway hav a gud day. N dont let the
kids bully u xx (note: shes a teaching assistant at an
infant school)


S
Heyyyy i dont get bullied,,lol. You pgpg


S
You have a gd day is that what i was saying. Lol. Spk to
u later. x


Me
Hey, if those kids pick on u i'll come over n confiscate
their bucket n spades and colouring books! Ur adorable! xx

S
Either you're trying to wind me up or you're blatantly
flirtin.... :->


Me
Hey hey yeah i wasnt trying t wind u up. If i say somthing
outta line just holla I'm so tired i wanna fall asleep!
Question. Wats ur fav restaurant? Main course and desert? x

S
Dont worry, what i meant by winding up ws jus teasing, not
in a bad way. Anyways get some rest after u finish work.
Restaurant? Dnt have fav's, any as long as thy do veg stuff..
whyy?

Me
Alreet, i dont mind le teasin either :0 C ya tomoz. Nite nite.
x

S
Missed u at the bus stop today.

Me
yeah public transport pffft! And a fly flew in my eye to top
it of! Poor me! x

S
Lol, i think the fly must've died by going into ur eye. Only
joking. anyways spk to u later. x

Me
Now u've hurt me. We're sooooo over! Ha. X

S
Loll! Heyyyy i didn't know we were going out. I Still dont know
u well enough. We've got to hang out together so i kno u better,
right?

Me
So u wanna hang out? Ur pretty direct aren't ya sunshine! Its only cos
u hav cute dimples wen u smile that i'm even entertainin le idea

Wat
u eatin 4 lunch?

S
Yep, thats just how i am. Just thought its better to get to knw each
other.. becs i hardly kno u. i just had cheese and salad sandwiches.
You?My lunchtime is over now.Chat to u later x


Me [this is late in the evening]
Hey nite nite. I've got a gift 4 ya but u'll hav 2
wait til 2moz 2 find out wat it is.Xx


[its now the morning and I'm chatting to her at the bus stop
her bus is about to drive off so she runs to catch it. Throws
her arms around my neck and hugs me before she goes. I txt her
"now she'll hav to wait tomorrow for her gift"]


S
Now you have to tell me what is was.

Me
Nooooooo way missy?! X

S
Lol, 2mro is too long to wait. The anticipation
is killing me alrdy. x


Me
Well S [mention her name for nlp bonus value] i
woz going to take ur hand, lead u
down the backstreet behind Kmart. Then I'd ask u to
close ur eyes and hold out ur hand. Then I'd take ur
hand in mine and i'd lean in and kiss u gently. Then
u'd open ur eyes and smile coquettishly and i'd say
'that gift is JUST for u. Don't go telling anyone else
about that shyt.' [Here i'm deliberately planting the
seed of kissing her. It removes plausible deniability
because she knows exactly what I'm going to do if I
ask her if she wants my gift - but i believe
the pros outweigh the cons] But i guess u've spoilt le
surprise so i'll hav 2 get u a kinder egg instead! Ha Xx.

S
Quit fantasizing. I think i prefer the kinder
egg compared to the other gift. Joke. Hope
ur having a gd day. x


Me
[After freezing her out for a day I decide to go for a
high risk approach, if this works I can cut a week or two
of cute little baby games out. There are no smiley faces or lols
in my msg. I am unapologetically imposing my frame onto her]

OK look kid, i'm gonna be straight up honest with ya. Let's
stop with these txt games. Believe me, i can play these games
all day long.. But i don't want to. I know u said u wantd t
get t know me and i genuinely WANT the same but wer not in school
anymore. I LIKE u and i know u feel the same. I apologise for
my honesty but not 4 my actions. I missd u at le bus stop today
hav a gud day. Xx


S
Hey, i'll tell u one thing about me, I honestly
don't and wasn't playing any games because i'm not
that kind of person. I'm sorry u felt that way. I just
found u odd becs u had a funny way of showing that u
are interestd in me. And u are right that i am beginning
2 like [of course Ha] u but i need 2 get to know u better..
and don't apologise for ur honesty, i appreciate honesty!
Hopefully see u 2mro and we'll sort this, yea? xx
[LOL]

Me
Cool.X


S
Cool but I stil want my gift. Haha :-Px

Me
U will get it- and u just made me smile, Xx [reward that shit]

-------------------------------------------------------

Ok, now to the point where I fucked up. I organised a day 2, as
expected she doesn't flake but makes up an excuse, no surprise.

Later SHE organises a day 2, but I unfortunately my cousins are down
for the weekend and I have to entertain them.

We meet up at the bus-stop and she again organises another day this
time during the week day. But I mis-interpret the msg however, I just
ignore the fact that I mis-interpretd the msg and continue as all is
Ok.

And then nothing, for three days, no msgs and I don't see her at the
bus-stop.


CONCLUSIONS

And boy this is hard to write as I was sooooo close.

-Don't apologise about your sexual frame, apologise for her reactions. Impose your frame as the leader and the man on her as soon as possible.

-WINDOWS of FUCKING OPPORTUNITY exist for BRIEF periods. I should
have SACKED off my cousins and gone to meet her as she had little
investment and that would have been the perfect time to consolidate and

remove any doubts she had in her mind.

-Perhaps I was entering seduction too early before building comfort.
She said in her msgs, so many times, 'I wanna get to know you better'
and I just ignored it and carried on being sexually agressive ( I've not posted everything)


Hope someone takes something back from this. Sorry about the length of
the post, but I'm on a journey so I like to catalogue this shit. As
they say, onwards we plough.

_________________
*Justice renders the WEAK his due*
My Journal
here-vp445642.html#445642

Well I am not an expert but my feeling is the following. I really liked the msgs you were sending each other. But the message where you say that you could be playing these games all day and you prefer to be direct and honest was kinda stupid. I didn't like that message. I think these message that you claim to be childish are fun and girls really like these games. Ey, even I liked reading these messages. The conversation was quit funny. But than you ruined it with that message at the end.

I also think that when you didn't meet her because of your cousins, that shouldn't be a problem. You have a life of your own and she has to accept that in the same way you accepted her excuse when she couldn't show up the first time. If that really was the problem than it is better to not date her in the first place because a relationship with such a person is gonna make you very unhappy.

The real problem as I see it, is that you misinterpreted the message but didn't tell her anything about that. She expected you to be there but you didn't show up and you didn't contact her to tell her the real reason for that. So possibly she thinks you are a bastard. You are waiting for 3 days for her to contact you while you were the one that didn't show up. I think you should be the one to start sending msgs again and ask her why you don't hear anything from her anymore. She will probably say because you flaked on her without telling her any reason. Than you can go on explaining the real reason.

This is actually priceless Tweeby. This can happen to me... and actually, I know it will happen to me someday somehow. But again, it's all about the lessons we can take from it.

_________________
On the Road to Manhood, my new learning journal: http://bit.ly/TEVapM
(My old learning journal http://bit.ly/eYRWL4)

Very detailed field report and I like the way you wrote it, I actually enjoyed reading it like I would a story. Anyway, I felt that you used some pretty decent strategies (I really like your strategy with the note, and I don't think it was cheesy at all.). However, I would recommend in the future you don't be so reliant on texting, face to face is more powerful. Besides if anything, in my opinion at least, you always want to appear as someone who is too interesting and busy for texting. Good Luck next time!