Hi, I'm guessing that is not an intro you are used to hearing and perhaps my situation is a little different from most on this board. A little background and then it might make some sense.

I am in my 40s and happily married and NO, I AM NOT LOOKING TO CHEAT ON MY WIFE!!! However I am in a situation where I need to develop some game.

Back in my youth I was a total, clueless AFC and rarely had any dates and never tried to approach any women. I was the absolute classic "nice guy" and heard the "lets just be friends" line from just about every woman I knew. If I did try to make some pathetic approach on an attractive gal I liked I would get shot down in seconds and then she would try to set me up with one of her fat and pathetic friends while she banged some bad boy loser that treated her like dirt.

I managed to get lucky (and yes it was pure luck) and had a few LTRs over the years and eventually (as in after I turned 30) I met the hottie of my dreams and we eventually married and had a family and lived happily ever after.

So why I am here? Well my wife and I have started swinging and now that I am over 40, bald and have spent the last 15 years raising kids, paying bills, putting a spouse through school etc I am back in the market where I have to learn to talk to and approach women all over again. I have learned from my painfull past and know that I do not have any natural game and that I have to learn a whole new skillset and so here I am.

Now I know what you are thinking (because I used to think this too) you are thinking, "yeah but swinger chicks are already a slamdunk and you don't need any game."

WRONGO!!!!!

Ladies in the swinger community already have husbands and are already happily married to their own "nice guy." They are only going to fuck guys that turn them on and that they find hot and attractive. Swingers still need to look sharp, be outgoing on confident and need to be able to approach and flirt and charm just as much if not even MORE than a single guy picking up single chicks in meat-market.

I am looking forward to learning more about pick-up and learning some new skills at this new stage in my life.

For me you voluntarily want jump into boiling water. May luck be with you because you will need it.
I'd never do such thing myself. You say you live happily and you want jeopardize that ? Well, it's your life. Learning style and confidence is one thing, doing risky moves - completely other.

Thats a pretty narrow minded response right there. While swinging aint my thing either (Im 29 and single) I know friends of a similar age who have been with their partners and dabbled with a bit of swinging. I have on many occasions questioned why they would 'risk' what they have and their response has always been we trust each other.

Just cos the OP says he's happy doesnt mean his sex life couldnt do with a bit of turbo injection! Good luck to you man. We all get up to all sorts of freaky shit, even if its not swinging. Horses for Courses!

I realize there are a lot of people that are not into swinging or think that it is wrong but I have to admit I'm little suprized at the negativity here. I figured this would be one place a swinger wouldn't generate a lot of shock and horror.

Oh well, I accept that it is not for everyone and I do not try to convert those of different mindsets. All I will say is that is that we have been doing this for several years and have had our share of successes and challenges and while it is not for everyone, it has worked quite well for us and we enjoy greatly. If you consider something that a couple does together for the mutual enjoyment and benifit for each "risky moves" then so be it, we are risk takers.

I know a ton of other middle aged couples that have been married 15 years and they sit around the house getting fat and lazy and pretty much hate each other and are both sexually frustrated and dissatisfied and they lay alone with their thoughts at night dreaming of many of the activities that we have the giblets to go out and do.

I'm not sure what kind of "risk" that you think it is that we are doing but I have seen the results of people that never take some form of risk and I want no part of it. NOTHING VENTURED, NOTHING GAINED!!

Dude

Listen admittedly I have played a wrong hand myself, with a woman who fancies me but I have made it out that I am above her, but I trully believe that the only limits a person has are the ones they impose on themselves.

Dont worry about what you consider your shortcomings, everyone who goes to these swinger events is on an equal platter.

Be charming, be confident, show women you know what you want and I guarntee you success. If you act shy or lack confidence, women can spot a loser from a 100 miles, show them you are unique, show them that you are confident thats why you are in a successful relationship because you have already proven yourself.

Dress smart, different to everyone else be unique, dont try to hard be indifferent and above all realise how important eye contact is use it as your weapon of choice, undress women with your eyes and trust me they will want to at least get to know what you think of them. Everyone wants compliments make the woman feel beautiful, sexual remember the reason you are here is to fulfill the fantasy.

I wish you the best of luck


Alatheia00

Dude

Listen admittedly I have played a wrong hand myself, with a woman who fancies me but I have made it out that I am above her, but I trully believe that the only limits a person has are the ones they impose on themselves.

Dont worry about what you consider your shortcomings, everyone who goes to these swinger events is on an equal platter.

Be charming, be confident, show women you know what you want and I guarntee you success. If you act shy or lack confidence, women can spot a loser from a 100 miles, show them you are unique, show them that you are confident thats why you are in a successful relationship because you have already proven yourself.

Dress smart, different to everyone else be unique, dont try to hard be indifferent and above all realise how important eye contact is use it as your weapon of choice, undress women with your eyes and trust me they will want to at least get to know what you think of them. Everyone wants compliments make the woman feel beautiful, sexual remember the reason you are here is to fulfill the fantasy.

I wish you the best of luck


Alatheia00

It's not negativity, I have nothing against it.
I only cannot imagine how your wife feels seeing you fucking other woman and you see her being fucked by someone else but if you are sure it is pleasure for her (I know it is for you) - I wish you all the best.