My whole life I've been a complete FAIL with women. I've never had a GF and I'm still a virgin. Every girl I've liked, nothing has happened, and to my knowledge no girl has ever liked me, 1 girl in my whole life asked me out. I got bullied pretty bad at School by girls, maybe that has something to do with it.

Throughout School and University, no girlfriend never bothered me; my "life plan" was to concentrate on my studies, get a decent job, then a house then worry about girls later. I'm 28 in 2 weeks, and I'm still not overly bothered I don't have a girlfriend; what bothers me is I've never had one or had anything happen to date. It makes me sort of think that I've went this long without anything....at this stage in my life what is anything REALLY going to change, and is it not a bit late?

I'm fairly content being single. I have a lot of hobbies, things to do with my time and my job is quite demanding. I have a lot of friends and I generally enjoy life. I do often find myself quite busy with things - if a girl was to come along, and I started seeing someone it would be extremely alien to me, like trying to learn Japanese or something. Considering my 0% experience I explained above, I then think if I can't even get a girlfriend, what chance do I have of finding someone and then keeping them and having things work out? I'm kinda looking at it now whereby i say "Well, I've never had one, so i don't know what its like. I'm not missing anything as I've never had it in the first place, its not done me any harm so far" The worrying thing perhaps is when I get into my older years still like this and then i become lonely.

I have at least 7 good female friends, if you were to look at my FB page theres loads of pics of me with girls, you'd be fooled into thinking I'm a hit with the ladies. I've always been everyones friend. Everyone says I'm a nice genuine guy.

I don;t really believe in fate. I believe in your own actions affecting your own life/decesions, and if things don;t work out for you (barring acts of God, like the recent Haiti disaster, or things you can't control like the world recession) its because you haven't done it properly or its outwith your skillset. Learning game is apparently manageable by anyone....ignoring my phyiscal looks, if all it takes is to be a strong, confident genuine person and I can manage this is that all i really need?

I have over 40GB worth of PUA material (Yes - I've become one of those guys who just accumulates material and never reads it or really does anything about it) so its not like I don't have stuff to read or try. Last year I ended up in a mental hospital for 4 days with a mental breakdown due to a family bereavement. When I got out I saw it as a wake up call and decided I would put more effort into my life; I went to bed earlier and groomed myself better, saw a hypnotist to help improve my confidence and wellbeing, started going running to keep fit etc and even attended a PUAT bootcamp which went pretty well.

I work with at least 4 guys who are in their mid 40's+ - all single. Some people in life do life their entire life alone, I'm just wondering no matter what i try if thats going to be the same for me, like I said I'm almost 28 and nothing has happened so far.

In life in general, if you cant do something or you dont know how to do it, you learn or get taught; how to drive, how to do your job, how to do maths/englush, learn martial arts etc. But it saddens me that I have to resort to books and tactics" to try and get successfull with women, this should surely be a natural thing. If any of my friends found out about the books and stuff I have i would be a laughing stock, they would just say it doesn't work.

I suppose my overall point is, to try and wrap this up:

I think to myself that if the above is true about your own actions VS fate, if I put the effort in and try to change my ways...surely i will be successfull? I think on the flip side that given how unsuccessful I've been to date, trying all this pick up stuff surely can't make things any worse? Can i really go from an almost 28 year old with no experience to someone who generally gets on well....it could take me years?

Stop debating. Stop theorizing. Stop being so negative.

Just do it.

Thanks......that kinda is straight ot the point and true....but I am kinda struggling here.

Theres been a lot of views of this post - theres surely a lot of experienced guys on here, nobody else got anything to comment?

A lot of people have gone from nothing to everything. even late in their lives.. I read in some pua books about pple in their 40's getting laid for the 1st time, once they got guidance.

I think it's never too late, but it gets harder the longer you wait. just like going back to school or whatever. Also, a lot of people who had it good a few years ago are now having a hard time, and vice versa. I`m talking money, women, and socially but everything else could apply.

Just keep your head up cuz someone's got it worse than you. if you're determined than you can make it, just find the right surrounding, put into application what you learn, and don't get caught up in drugs cuz that shit mess up your life!!

You have way too much material lol, yeah I said it. Just get out there and do it. Putting yourself out there is the only way to gain experience, waiting for a girl to walk into your life will never work, you have to go out and find the girl to BRING into your life.

Its all on you buddy no pressure

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I'm pretty much in the same position as you are Tocasmiracle (that name from the song? what a video it has:)). I'm 27 and never had a gf or anything close, never been kissed etc.

Yeah I do wonder how the hell someone our age can go out and manage to keep a gf when lacking all that experience (even though we don’t have the skills necessary to get a gf anyway) . It's something most people get when they are 13 onwards and I guess learn as they get older and so the learning curve at the start is pretty gentle. We are basically 15 years behind and at this age girls will expect you to know these things.

By things i don't mean just sex/kissing etc But also just how you go about your life with a gf. Are you supposed to be with her all the time, phone her a lot, always eat together? How do you act with her around friends (not that I have any anyway!). Simple things like going for a meal with her, hanging out with her and her friends. Just so many normal things that the girl is gonna expect you to know how to handle, or at least not make a total mess of it. We’ve not learnt it.

I too have loads of PUA material, read bits here and there but never really followed through on any of it. Still never approached a woman so I still can’t really say what their response will be.

I had got used to being alone, but lately I feel i really would like somebody there.. The idea that there is somebody who actually wants to be with you rather than anybody else..My god, it blows my mind.

So I have returned to this site and once again cracked open the PUA material. I’ve read stuff here and in the material about people going from nothing to being good with girls and having great relationships etc. So I suppose it is possible. But then I wonder if my certain circumstances would prove to the exception to the rule.. but then like I said, I’ve never gone out and done any of it so I don’t know. I’ve decided to spend all of my free time over the next week or so reading up on the material I have. But I suppose the best way to do it, as BackwardsMarathon and pretty much everything else you will read tells you, is to Just do it.

Hopefully I will get the balls to do just that!

Maybe this is what you need to hear.

I'm 27. I've been in two relationships, both of which were online long-distance relationships. I have no experience in personal relationships. I've always been terrible with women and, in general, social situations.

I started PUA a couple months ago. Although I'm facing a lot of struggles, it's already made a huge difference in my life. In fact, I've had loads of experiences just as side-effects from getting out there and looking to meet people -- I've played music on stage, danced with people I've never met in ways I've never moved before, and have a complete turnabout in terms of my views of myself and where I stand in my life relative to others.

I still have some trouble opening and haven't really nailed A2 yet (MM). Despite this, I attracted a cute 18yr-old just by virtue of my new appearance and general outward demeanor. As in, she actually hit on me. Because of my studies in this, I've been able to take advantage of the opportunity and actually move it somewhere instead of immediately flubbing like I've always done before.

Not that I'm saying you should wait for a girl to hit on you, but things will happen to you if you take proactive steps in your life to try to make them happen. It won't always be as you expect or plan, but you usually do have to do something if you want some results.

Now the question is just whether or not you have any motivation. You're here, which is a good thing, but why? Do you care about getting a girl or not? Would you really like to experience that in your life, or are you just worried about being perceived as a failure by others?

Figure out what you want before you do anything else, or it's going to fuck up any game you try to put together.

Look at it this way . . .

Most of the guys on this forum have nothing to offer girls other than a few lines memorized from books or the Internet and they still manage to do well . . .

You have a life. . . you have an education . . .you have a job . . .

Most girls in their mid 20's are DYING to find guys who are centered, balanced, and can offer them an "instant" LIFE. See . . . girls are in the same boat as you. Regardless of the # of cocks they've sucked or the # of guys they've allowed to ram their vagina, girls in their 20's are asking, "What else?" . . . And many come to the realization that their looks and their willingness to spread their legs can only carry them so far.

You're actually in the BEST position to try this out. At a "professional" 28, you can go young . . .you can go old . . . You have the pick of the lot. Don't bother comparing yourself to 19 year olds who've managed to fuck a bunch of insecure chicks. Those girls will ALWAYS be around and they are STILL there for you picking if you desire.

You are in position to get ANY TYPE of girl you desire. You're right . . . this "game" should be natural. Everything should come easy . . . but if you're a professional, then you know that in order to obtain goals, you're going to have to learn to use some tools. These PU tactics are no different than learning a set of skills required to be efficient with your career. If you have a pile of PU material, then you probably already have enough skills to go out and apply them in the real World. Go ahead and give it a spin. It's just a tiny tweak and not an overhaul.

Nobody one on this Earth can change their past, but every single person in this World has the power to change their future.

I don't think there is some set time period involved. It would take me about a month to get you laid half-a-dozen times based on what you've said.

A couple of points:-

1) No girl has ever asked me out and I'm older than you. Chicks just don't do that usually, no big deal.
2) You have a good circle of female friends. That is a huge deal and where most guys struggle.

Your lack of experience is a problem in your own head. I have dated women over 35 who behaved more stupidly than a typical teenager on a first date-so much for experience. I didn't give a crap and most women probably won't either-unless you telegraph the fact.

That said, you haven't given us nearly enough info to help you. You say you have a ton of PUA info, so why aren't you using it? Normally I'd guess it was crippling approach anxiety, but you don't even need to approach much if you have seven female friends, you should meet enough girls through their extended social circle.

Anyway stop the-my-life-is-so-terrible-and-everything-is-bad horseshit.
No it bloody isn't. I know several guys who are ten years older and who will absolutely never get laid, have no female social circle and believe PUA is evil or something, trust me you are nothing like as badly off as them.

Did you consider that attitude might be holding you back? If you act like that around your girl friends they will telegraph that to any prospects you encounter-no one fancies a whinger.